Forum behavior: Split from "Newly Certified Diver OOA at Gilboa"

[24940]

Unfortunately some people express themselves badly in the written medium. That said, I think some of the comments here have bordered on destructive rather than constructive criticism. Please stay and make a contribution towards changing that on SB. There are those who can debate well and succinctly, and not resort to personal attack.

I think personal experiences are worth reading about, and if we can learn from them as well then that's a bonus.

And may I say, in my opinion when people are hounded off here, then that reflects badly on ALL of us.

Yes, people can be blunt. You will never change that. Some of the most valuable lessons to be learned on this board come from what I believe you would consider to be rude members. For some of us, it's a bit like watching people run around with their face on fire. We scream "DUDE! YOUR FACE IS ON FIRE!!!!" and they reply with something like "I'm sorry, but I find your tone offensive and hostile. Besides, who are you to say my face is on fire?"

While I don't condone personal attacks, I don't think anyone benefits from beating around the bush or sacrificing the message for the sake of someones feelings. "Honey, are your cheeks feeling a little warm? Can I get you a fire extinguisher?"

FisherDVM, suck it up.... People don't agree with you, so what? You got called on a few things, think about them and move on. Crap people, it's the internet.... You contribute, you learn... it's a beautiful thing.

Much is read into posts that only exists in the eye of the person reading the post. Change your perception and you'll completely change the board. It's a lot easier and less frustrating than attempting to change members.

 

[ScubaSteve]

Wow people. I cannot believe I made it through the whole thread. fftopic: I have a couple points to add on how people acted rather than the original point.

Fisher....you have been mauled and attacked by some, and supported by others. We, as humans are all asses. Some hide it better than others but that is life. It is also in our nature, as you have exhibited, to get defensive when our "abilities or actions" are called into question.

I do believe that others should never post a destructive post here and sometimes all that takes is a second read before you introduce your mouse pointer to the "POST REPLY" button. Too often the written medium is misunderstood because you lose all descriptive actions and mood indicators when not in person. Harsh words are not always intended to be harsh. Sometimes it is only for "shock value" and that is all, but I can support you in saying I probably would have reacted the same way to this post had it been mine.

NOW for the bigger issue. Scuba Diving is a DANGEROUS sport and I don't care who says otherwise. Humans do not have gills. For this reason, we are somewhere that we really have no right being. Since this is a dangerous sport, every single one of us MUST, absolutely MUST be able to take properly delivered criticism and turn it into a positive learning experience to correct something. This may not be the absolute best area to get that criticism because

"Too often the written medium is misunderstood because you lose all descriptive actions and mood indicators when not in person. Harsh words are not always intended to be harsh."

but there are a tremendous number of good intentions out there that just want to have everybody love the sport of Scuba Diving.

We all need to step away from a post when our emotions get in the way. I think the threads would be better received and people would learn even more from them if we could do this. Hopefully you are here to read this. For now, I have my popcorn here and will follow this thread and many others.

 

[livinoz]

Yes, people can be blunt. You will never change that. Some of the most valuable lessons to be learned on this board come from what I believe you would consider to be rude members. For some of us, it's a bit like watching people run around with their face on fire. We scream "DUDE! YOUR FACE IS ON FIRE!!!!" and they reply with something like "I'm sorry, but I find your tone offensive and hostile. Besides, who are you to say my face is on fire?"

While I don't condone personal attacks, I don't think anyone benefits from beating around the bush or sacrificing the message for the sake of someones feelings. "Honey, are your cheeks feeling a little warm? Can I get you a fire extinguisher?"

FisherDVM, suck it up.... People don't agree with you, so what? You got called on a few things, think about them and move on. Crap people, it's the internet.... You contribute, you learn... it's a beautiful thing.

Much is read into posts that only exists in the eye of the person reading the post. Change your perception and you'll completely change the board. It's a lot easier and less frustrating than attempting to change members.

Okay, let me respond in the type of language you have used here, why don't you suck it up? I AM NOT the only one here who found some of the replies to this offensive but you have decided to single me out because of the opinions I hold and have expressed elsewhere. I am perfectly aware this is the internet and apparently people can do and say exactly what they please. And I am not stupid enough to believe it's alright to condone unsafe behaviour, but there are means of expressing yourself that are far from offensive and have just as much impact.

I believe that when someone is attacked because of their language, and "judged" because of their grammar and punctuation then that's unfair when English is NOT their first language. And when their professional competence is also called into question, than that becomes absolutely untenable. I am tired of the argumentative tones of people's replies to some topics; if that's the way you want to be, go right ahead, but it's not for me or for some other people who prefer civilised debate instead of personal attack. When anyone is hounded off here, especially someone who has much to offer in the way of experience and information, then that IS a cause for concern, at least it is for me. No wonder people are reluctant to share their experiences if all they get in return is a form of bullying and abuse. But, if that's the way you all want it, fine, go right ahead. I, for one, won't be taking any further part in this board, no doubt to your immense relief.

 

[24940]

Okay, let me respond in the type of language you have used here, why don't you suck it up?

What exactly would you like me to suck up?

I AM NOT the only one here who found some of the replies to this offensive but you have decided to single me out because of the opinions I hold and have expressed elsewhere.

I think you are over estimating your importance to me. I quoted your post because it clearly represents a view which I have seen from others. From my experience, people who hold this idealistic view often can't see the forest through the trees and frequently miss out on the most important points conveyed in a post. It's a shame you seem to feel picked on, but that's your issue, not mine.

I am perfectly aware this is the internet and apparently people can do and say exactly what they please. And I am not stupid enough to believe it's alright to condone unsafe behaviour, but there are means of expressing yourself that are far from offensive and have just as much impact.

Offensive is subjective. I find whining offensive. I find people who rush in to tell others how they should behave offensive. I respect others opinions of what they find offensive, but draw the line when they start telling us how to behave. I find there are far more offended people out there than there are offensive people. Clearly, you appear to be offended by a post I made, which was posted with no intent of offending. I'm offended you found it offensive, so where does that leave us?

I believe that when someone is attacked because of their language, and "judged" because of their grammar and punctuation then that's unfair when English is NOT their first language.

I feel such attacks reflect poorly on the person making the attacks. I don't care about fair. I do care about safety and facts.

I am tired of the argumentative tones of people's replies to some topics; if that's the way you want to be, go right ahead, but it's not for me or for some other people who prefer civilised debate instead of personal attack. When anyone is hounded off here, especially someone who has much to offer in the way of experience and information, then that IS a cause for concern, at least it is for me. No wonder people are reluctant to share their experiences if all they get in return is a form of bullying and abuse.

This all sounds rather argumentative to me.

But, if that's the way you all want it, fine, go right ahead. I, for one, won't be taking any further part in this board, no doubt to your immense relief.

My immense relief? You truly do overestimate your importance to me.

 

[ScubaSteve]

Okay, let me respond in the type of language you have used here, why don't you suck it up? I AM NOT the only one here who found some of the replies to this offensive but you have decided to single me out because of the opinions I hold and have expressed elsewhere. I am perfectly aware this is the internet and apparently people can do and say exactly what they please. And I am not stupid enough to believe it's alright to condone unsafe behaviour, but there are means of expressing yourself that are far from offensive and have just as much impact.

I believe that when someone is attacked because of their language, and "judged" because of their grammar and punctuation then that's unfair when English is NOT their first language. And when their professional competence is also called into question, than that becomes absolutely untenable. I am tired of the argumentative tones of people's replies to some topics; if that's the way you want to be, go right ahead, but it's not for me or for some other people who prefer civilised debate instead of personal attack. When anyone is hounded off here, especially someone who has much to offer in the way of experience and information, then that IS a cause for concern, at least it is for me. No wonder people are reluctant to share their experiences if all they get in return is a form of bullying and abuse. But, if that's the way you all want it, fine, go right ahead. I, for one, won't be taking any further part in this board, no doubt to your immense relief.

Liv, I whole heartedly agree with you in what you say here. I am not agreeing with you as it pertains to any one individual but the issue you touch on here is very real. Abrupt is non-constructive in my humble opinion. What does abrupt mean?

1. sudden or unexpected
2. curt or brusque in speech, manner, etc.

People can definitely be abrupt but we all need to realize that being abrupt is simply a method of expressing one's self. Perhaps those that are abrupt can take the time to sit back and think that if their ABRUPT post can be misinterpereted, then maybe they misinterpereted the original post. Further, it is possible that the only reason things go out of control is because they are abrupt and give nobody a chance to breathe and correct the misunderstanding. I said it in a previous post....human nature makes us put up our guard as soon as someone attacks us (and that is what being abrupt is, don't kid yourself). It is called self-preservation and can rarely be controlled by us. If we use constructive rather than destructive tones in our posts, more people will read (AND LEARN which is what this is all about - learning from our mistakes and experiences) and fewer events will get out of control like this one has.

I personally love a good fight, but this one has just gotten stupid!!!! Keep it above the belt people.

 

[jon m]

Hey, I've taken enough hints from you, DocVikingo, and others. As you can see my profile is deleted. I'll request NetDoc to remove my account.

this is pretty sad...
lost a good contributor

 

[El Orans]

We don't delete profiles.

Let me elaborate on that.

We don't delete profiles once they have posted.

If we'd delete a profile and the related posts, lots of other users would be affected as they would reply to something that would no longer exist.

In cases like this we recommend that the user profile is cleaned of all personal info. We'll also stop all notifications to the linked email account. When requested, we can also change the user name to something anonymous.

Hope this clarifies things a bit.

 

[FF-EMT Diver]

Hello, decided to come to this forum to learn from others mistakes, I would like to say that I appreciate everyone's opinion/contributions to the forums, Yes I see both sides of the picture, As a FF/EMT am I ready for every situation NO WAY! but I will do all in my power to help someone but I would gladly turn it over to someone with more exp. I dont think Fisherdvm posted to glorify anything he or anyone else did just stating a fact of what happened although he did not know all the details of the incident, Also for the benefit of the doubt let's say that the ones responding back were not trying to pick him or his skills apart, Although I wuold say to you if this were not your intention you should begin to pay more attantion to the way you present yourself, Trust me there is no bigger turnoff than someone acting like they know it all. SO WHY DON'T WE DROP THIS ARGUMENT RIGHT HERE SINCE NONE OF US HAS ANY POINT TO MAKE BECAUSE IT SURE SEEMS LIKE THE EDUCATION YOU GAIN FROM THIS FORUM IS BEING OUTWIEGHED BY ALL THE CRITICISM, Thanks for listening and let's move on.

 

[The Chairman]

I have split this discussion about forum behavior from This Discussion. Enjoy.

 

[300bar]

, Yes I see both sides of the picture, As a FF/EMT am I ready for every situation NO WAY! but I will do all in my power to help someone but I would gladly turn it over to someone with more exp.

Man did you hit the nail right on the head.
As a new Mod,I see both side and sometimes some more.Am I ready for all the ***** I see,NO WAY!but I'll do anything in my power to help each and everyone the best way I can.The only thing I need is that you,my fellow members hit the darn "report"button.That's the one in the lower left of every post.As soon as you hit it,tell us your beef and we WILL look into it.Oh and yes I gladly turn it over to someone with more experience,but they don't take over:rofl4:

KEEP HITTING THAT REPORT BUTTON WHEN YOU SEE ANYTHING YOU DON'T LIKE.
(When you think it violates the ToS)