This video from ISE's Achim was helpful to me for my backplate and strap adjustments. It uses your body parts as a reference, so it will have some adjustment for different body types built-in. Achim is a tall and very fit guy, so his advice might not be perfect for every body type, but it is a good starting place.
The main takeaway I have from reading a lot of these types of threads is, most folks will start with their shoulder straps way too tight. I know I did. You ideally want a whole lot of slack in the shoulders, and very little slack in the waist and crotch. The waist strap holds the rig to your body, the crotch strap keeps the waist strap in place. And the shoulder straps, frankly, don't do anything at all in the water, they just make it easier to carry the rig around topside. For example, this guy removes his shoulder straps entirely to illustrate the point that shoulder straps are not needed to keep the rig in place while underwater.
Edit to add: regarding your idea to use an STA. I have an STA, and have mixed feelings about whether it is helpful or not. It does make it a little easier to change tanks on the boat, and it is about a pound negative, right near my spine, which is nice. And, like you say, it does bump the regs back a bit. But it does so by bumping the tank back a bit as well, which makes it more difficult to achieve a stable trim. The more negative your tank is, the worse this instability problem is. I do not think it is the first solution to your current issue, it would be better to correctly adjust what you have, before purchasing an STA.