A risk worth taking ????

[Randy43068]

he'll be around a long long time yet. As some wise posters said, get another opinion if he's willing.

Consider his state of mind if he didn't dive any more? I know it's only a hobby/sport (whatever) but it may be that important to him. As you said, he'd just dive with someone else....

I am more concerned with his impact on me rather than him. I can't change his actions! I MIGHT could slow him down, but he's still going to dive. I bet if I called him right now and told him I wasn't diving with him anymore.....I'de call home this weekend and mom would tell me that Dad had gone diving. That's just how he is.

I guess I'll continue diving with him. It's just HORRIBLE thought that Daddy could not plan our next dive. And, I know that the rest of my family will not understand. (but who really cares)

 

[Randy43068]

discussed this with your dad? See what he's got to say about it. Tell him what you're telling us here on SB.

Yes, I understand what your saying. Not offended.

I WILL help my Dad. He knows that. There is NO way that I couldn't. I just don't know if I should go at all. He's going though. Should I risk not going and not being there to help, or going and having to watch him have a heart attack or worse?

My Dad and I have a great relationship. It is all based on diving. We talk scuba, we go on trips, buy gear, ect... We are the only divers in the family and it has brought us close. This dilema will DRASTICALLY change our relationship. No matter what action I take. I want to choose the best one. That's why I'm asking fellow divers. Only fellow divers will understand.

 

[scubajoh44]

Yes, the scooter is a great idea!!

Yes, I'll talk it over with him. I'll see if I can pry the condition out of him. You deffinately hit the nail on the head when you said he may feel like he is loosing control. He is a proud man and would never allow that to happen. Maybe asking for help on how to handle situations would help me get the info I need.

and Yes, maybe he'll loose his C-card pretty soon. Doesn't it take about 2 weeks for a new one?

 

[MikeFerrara]

There's more to life than diving and apparantly the doctors feel that physical or mental stress may shorten his life. I would ask him if one more dive is more important to him than 10 more days or years with his family. Of course some people might pick the dive. None of us have any insurance of longevity and any one of us might fall under a buss long before his condition takes him. I know I need to look out for the busses and he knows he needs to look out for the stress and the busses.

 

[Walter]

If they know him where he gets his fills, he probably doesn't need the card.

 

[Ber Rabbit]

like you are more concerned with the impact the guy would have on you, if he died while diving, rather than being concerned with him.

When you get down to it the impact is only on the living as the dead are, after all, dead. I firmly believe in living life to its fullest and hopefully getting the good parts on video I want to go to bull riding school and have my husband come out and video it--he won't because he doesn't want to watch me get maimed or killed by a bull. I respect that, after all he's the one who's left behind so I haven't signed up (so far).

A bit of selfishness on Jo's dad's part is understandable, being advised not to do things you love is hard. She is so willing to give of herself to the point of being willing to bear the emotional scars of watching her dad die. That takes a lot of guts and I hope he appreciates her unselfishness as he continues his own selfish behaviour.
Ber :lilbunny:

 

[scubajoh44]

They ALL know him.

 

[Diver0001]

It's a little creepy to come to terms with, but everybody dies eventually. The concept of a "good death" is unfortunately only clear after witnessing a bad one.

Bullseye, bother. I have every intention of dying under water too.... and I fully expect that my kids will say at my funeral "dad died 80 metres underwater and an hour over his NDL.....exactly where he would have wanted it...."

My worst fear is being 68 and hearing my doctor tell me "Mr. Turner, you have to go home and wait on the couch until death comes to you".

F--k that! My doctor may know how to prolong my death but I know how to live my life! and believe me, Mr. Death is going to have one hell of a fight on his hands when he comes for me....

And somehow, I think the older you get, the more true that statement rings.....

Your dad apparently has a strong preference to continue diving, and really, I can't blame him. Given the choice of a reasonably quick death from a heart-attack or drowing while diving, and a long drawn out death in a hospital, I'd pick diving too.

Terry

Notwithstanding this and what I said above, I think it's logical and reasonable for his loved ones to think this is weird....

R..

 

[Randy43068]

When you get down to it the impact is only on the living as the dead are, after all, dead. I firmly believe living life to its fullest and hopefully getting the good parts on video I want to go to bull riding school and have my husband come out and video it--he won't because he doesn't want to watch me get maimed or killed by a bull. I respect that, after all he's the one who's left behind so I haven't signed up (so far).

A bit of selfishness on Jo's dad's part is understandable, being advised not to do things you love is hard. She is so willing to give of herself to the point of being willing to bear the emotional scars of watching her dad die. That takes a lot of guts and I hope he appreciates her unselfishness as he continues his own selfish behaviour.
Ber :lilbunny:

good point, but if your husband said you have to stop diving because it could hurt you, I beleive you'd have a different take on it.
Besides, he's a LOT older'n you. That makes a difference, to my mind anyway.

 

[skybird]

my question is what is the medical condition? If it is heart related, has he been to a cardiologist?. I love my "family doctor" and trust him but he sends me to specalists when there is something specific such as heart. There are so many things to consider to asnwer the question if he should dive.