The Ultimate Product

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Well, don't forget that Preparation H was originally developed as a furniture polish before they found other applications for it.

Seriously who was "that" guy. I guess it went down like this:

Wife: OOoh honey, will you polish the furniture today?
Husband: Yes dear.
-----
Husband: <grumbling> stupid furniture polish, doesnt she know I have hemorrhoids?!</grumbling>
Wife: Hows it coming along dear?
Husband: Well im done! Furniture is all taken care of, and wouldn't you know it, that polish solved my hemorrhoids too!

This salesman must have been that couples son.
 
My only question is which shop you sent him to as you shoved him out of your door?
 
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Wife: New Shimmer is a floor wax!

Husband: No, new Shimmer is a dessert topping!

Wife: It's a floor wax!

Husband: It's a dessert topping!

Wife: It's a floor wax, I'm telling you!

Husband: It's a dessert topping, you cow!

Spokesman: [ enters quickly ] Hey, hey, hey, calm down, you two. New Shimmer is both a floor wax and a dessert topping! Here, I'll spray some on your mop.. [ sprays Shimmer onto mop ] ..and some on your butterscotch pudding. [ sprays Shimmer onto pudding ]

[ Husband eats while Wife mops ]

Husband: Mmmmm, tastes terrific!

Wife: And just look at that shine! But will it last?

Spokesman: Hey, outlasts every other leading floor wax, 2 to 1. It's durable, and it's scuff-resistant.

Husband: And it's delicious!

Spokesman: Sure is! Perks up anything from an ice cream sundae to a pumpkin pie!

Wife: Made from an exclusive non-yellowing formula.

Husband: I haven't even touched my pudding and I'm ready for more!

Wife: But what about black heel marks?

Spokesman: Dirt, grime, even black heel marks, wipe clean with a damp mop.

[ Husband accidentally sprays Shimmer onto the floor ]

Husband: Oh, sorry, honey, I'll clean that up!

Wife: Oh, no problem, sweetheart, not with new Shimmer!

[ Spokesman laughs continuously as he approaches the camera ]

Spokesman: New Shimmer, for the greatest shine you ever tasted!

[ fade ]
 
https://www.shearwater.com/products/teric/

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