The one thing I cannot seem to get: Equalizing

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Equalizing definitely gets better the more you practice it, and soon enough it will become second nature. As others have said, in addition to practice, you need to find a technique that works for you. Most divers are taught Valsalva, but it's not really the best and can cause damage if you blow too hard. And that's what a lot of new divers do when they can't equalize. Personally, I use the Lowry technique, which is when you pinch your nose, blow ever so slightly (I barely use any pressure) and swallow. That's the only technique that reliably works for me, but definitely try them all because you might find a better one for you.
What do you do when you have no more saliva to swallow? I was doing this (minus the slight Toynbee blowing) and my mouth dried out 20 mins in from the dry air.
 
You shouldn't need saliva in order to swallow. At least I don't.
Hm... so I suppose I have to learn how to do this with air and a reg in my mouth.

I know how to do this maneuver, so I could definitely practice it.
 
I find it much easier if I equalise early and frequently, like almost every meter for the first few meters.

Slow down your descent (or even pause) if you need to equalise and feel too task loaded.
I had a bad-fit mask during my cert so one of my two hands was dedicated to holding the skirt down and pinching my nose (instinct to breathe out via nose too strong at first). It was a feelsbad moment when even the 15 year old with my group was 20 feet below me waving up... at least I saw a shark on my cert dive lol.

I'll try to focus next time on equalizing early and I'll see how it goes. My instructor was absolutely centered on soft skills and emergency skills during the cert, and mentioned equalizing as we were about to descend to 15 feet in a pool... I'll work on breaking this bad habit and try to focus on doing it early.

One other thing, what are the general thoughts on FFMs? Are they hard to equalize with? Are they rec or specialty? I was reading up on them and the idea of establishing positive pressure inside to resist flooding did intrigue me. Is it something worth looking in to later on?
 
I did learn BTV when I was a child, in the sixties. I did learn it during the boring hours at elementary school.
Not being allowed to move from my desk, I spent a lot of time exercising control on all my muscles, including those which move the ears, the hair, which curve the tongue, etc.
So I got control on the specific muscles which open the tubes: this causes sound to enter the ear through them, and I was finding it funny, so I was doing it often. As any muscle, doing exercise makes them stronger and improves control. So I reached the point of being able to open the tubes for as long as I want.
When I was ten I started free diving in the sea. I did see all my friends and my brother struggling with their ears, until a youngster did explain them the Valsalva method. This appeared nonsense to me: what the hell was this problem? I did not experience it, as I was able to equalize instintively...
BTV was "discovered" in the nineties in France, and when I did read about it, I was already a diving instructor.
Only at that point I did understand that what I was doing since when I was a child was BTV, and that also others can do it.
At that point I attempted to teach this technique to my students, but I got mixed results.
Some people have good control of their muscles and learn BTV easily. For others it is more difficult, and can activate the muscles which open the tubes only doing other actions, such as swallowing.
A third group of students simply are unable to use BTV and need to close the nostrils with fingers for equalizing, as it is required with most other methods.
 
About FFM. I did use them for special dives, as search of dead bodies in rivers, equipped with an intercom.
I do not suggest them for rec diving, also because the trick I did usually employ with my students who had problems equalizing was to ask them to remove their mask and breath from the reg without the mask.
This triggers a number of instinctive reactions, one of them is the contraption of the muscles which cause an involuntary tube opening. You cannot do this easily with a FFM...
And evacuating water from a flooded FFM is not easy...
 
You can practice on land using otovent. There are tons of exercises and instructive videos online like this one:
 
About FFM. I did use them for special foves, as search of dead bodies in rivers, equipped with an intercom.
I do not suggest them for rec diving, also because the trick I did usually emy with my students who had problems equalizing was to ask them to remove their mask and breath from the reg without the mask.
This triggers a number of institive reactions, one of them is the contraption of the muscles which cause an involuntary tube opening. You cannot do this easily with a FFM...
And evacuating water from a flooded FFM is not easy...
Oh wow... I've seen a few videos from creators like Adventures with Purpose doing cold case searches and I cannot fathom the mental fortitude you would need to do them. Life is so precious :/

Interesting on the "flooding to help equalize" idea. That really works for some people?
 
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