Significant Others who don't dive

[FaithC]

I am getting my OW cert in June. My husband cannot dive due to his asthma. When we vacation I would like to dive, and he is fine with this as long as its one day only, not a full dive trip. So I have 2 questions:

1. I obviously lack a dive buddy when we are away, what is the standard protocol for going on a dive boat without a buddy? Do you let the dive operation know ahead of time? Do you get paired with the DM or a stranger?

2. I would love to go on some of the trips my LDS organizes, do most trips allows Sig. Others to go? Is there a reduced rate for someone who isn't going to dive? I just can't go without him, I think it would be unfair and somewhat cruel to go on a tropical trip without him. Still not sure if he would go for this as I'm sure I'd be diving the whole time.

Thanks!
-Faith

 

[crosshairs]

you probably wont be the only single on the boat, and they will know that your going to be a single when you sign up.....so they will pair you up with someone...in my case,when I vacation with my girlfriend, I often go on boat trips without her. She does dive, but not as much as I do so I often go alone while she may go lay on the beach.....its never been a problem yet.....

as far as trips with your LDS, it all depends..some will let non divers go for a reduced rate, others may not....just check with them on the trips your interested in

 

[TMHeimer]

1. Tell them you're without buddy ahead of time. Everyone else, of course is a stranger you could be buddied with. If you wish to go with a DM tell them- -usually a charge.

2. I've heard some dive ops (U.S.) have a reduced rate for non divers. My wife and I travel a lot together, so it is no big deal for me to do a week's tropical dive trip alone. Besides, you will be diving most likely every day, and that's why it makes no sense for my wife to be alone (ie.-who wants to go out on a boat and sit while all others are diving?--that would seem more unfair--plus it would cost twice as much for both of you to travel there). It is also possible there won't be topside activities where you go and if there are some, you may be just interested in relaxing after a day of diving.

 

[drrich2]

I just can't go without him, I think it would be unfair and somewhat cruel to go on a tropical trip without him.

I'm thinking you can, and if he has the ability/option to get certified & dive and chooses not to, it's not your fault, so to speak, that he doesn't.

That said, you guys might enjoy cruising. If you pick a cruise with an itinerary hitting highly diveable islands, you can go diving, but still spend much of your vacation together doing couples stuff, such as going to the evening shows.

Richard.

 

[vincent54]

My wife is a non diver and we never have a problem. When I boat dive, I'll buddy up with whoever is a single or just follow the dive master,no worries. Sometimes my wife will go on the boat, at least on Cayman Brac there isn't a problem. The diving is only a small part of a trip, so don't leave him home. I usually just dive in the morning anyway. Share your photos and stories with him. It is all good. Cheers

 

[261311]

Possibly because I'm not married and unacquainted with the politics of such, am I the only one here who thinks you don't need to take them everywhere with you? Them joining you on a few trips is fine and actually really cool but I'm sure they have their own fun with their friends without you by their side 100% of the time. If it's a cool place, for sure take them- but if you're going for diving, you can't be 100% responsible for their fun always

 

[drrich2]

261311:

I see it as you've laid it out, and I am married. That said, doing things separately (especially if said things take a week, cost a couple grand+ and are 'extra fun' - such as tropical Caribbean adventures) can be a hot topic in marriages.

I'm an only child & an introvert, so for me to say 'run off, have your fun, let me know when you're coming back' is natural and logical. My wife, who had 4 older siblings, tends to resent my stance sometimes (I like her family but see little reason to hang out with them - one of them calls me the Christmas Husband, because that's about the only time they all see me).

To sum it up, every couple has to navigate the issue themselves.

Richard.

 

[dmoore19]

Some trips my wife wants to go, some she doesn't. She is going to Coz with me next week, she is not going on the Aquacat with me. The way it works is that she goes to Alaska to visit her son, I get to go diving. Everybody gets something and everybody is happy.

 

[Damselfish]

LDS trips - they're certainly not going to tell you you can't bring your significant other. But, I've found a fair number of people on LDS trips have SOs who don't dive and that's exactly why they're on the group trip without them. It works out well for some people and helps with the instabuddy problem. It's something you might want to consider, maybe not very trip but sometimes. What kind of discount is available for a non-diver is going to depend on where they're going but I'd expect them to pass through whatever the non-diver rate is wherever they're going. You can look at websites for some dive resorts to get an idea but and you'll always see non-diver rates. Usually even a liveaboard will have some token discount for non-divers, but it will be pretty small since it doesn't cost them much less to have a non-diver.

What does your husband like to do? People might be able to suggest destinations or trips that are better compromises than others.

 

[Kilili]

I think it would be unfair and somewhat cruel to go on a tropical trip without him.

Each relationship is different, but he might love to get rid of you for a week or two, or even longer.
You deserve to have time of your own.
Nothing "unfair or cruel", I think. You want to dive, he doesn't, so leave him behind. Lots of people go diving without their spouse. How many hunters and fishermen bring their wife along?
As far as the "one day only" stuff, you get to maybe pick one day out of the vacation, and he gets to pick the rest? If all you "get" to dive is one day out of a vacation, why bother getting certified in the first place.