Shaking off anxiety after bad experience. Need advice.

[Fotoz4FX]

Hi Ann...
I'm not going to try to help you overcome your anxiety because I personally think that a little apprehension is an alert trigger that can only befriend you in your continuing education to becoming a better diver.
I've been diving for well over 35 years now and I too am apprehensive about my dives... I think of what could go wrong and how I would deal with it... entanglements (I dive a lot of wrecks in NJ), silt-outs, what if the line on my wreck reel breaks... what do I do if I lose my buddy or get disoriented and cannot find the way back to the anchor line... there are dozens upon dozens of things that could go wrong, in fact, just last night not only did the battery on my dive watch crap out on me during a dive (70') but my dive computer flooded too. I look at these things with logic as you need to do.
I had the foresight to purchase an analog pressure gauge in lieu of the battery operated computer substitute for that reason... and the incident gave me calm to know that I could guage my dive on my buddies computer since I was on nitrox and he was on air... I knew my nitrogen buildup would be less than his and so I continued the hunt (we were bug hunting on a wreck off Atlantic City at night).
Ann... you had a bad experience which made you apprehensive but you are diving with a renewed awareness and that my dear will make you a better diver.
I am an instructor and I don't think that taking an advanced course is going to help you become less apprehensive about your dive experience but certainly diving with more experienced divers or DM's will help your psyche with regard to knowing that someone can help you if a problem occurs.
The important thing to do is what you've already started to do Ann... when you fall off a bike, you get back on it and try again - with a renewed respect for gravity.
You go girl... I think I can speak for all of us when I say you are facing your hurdles and overcoming them... that alone gives me a great respect for you.

 

[TSandM]

There's a bit of a Catch-22 here. You need skills to be safe in the water, but working on skill can itself cause anxiety, and failure to execute skills to your own satisfaction can cause more. The more worried you get, the harder it is to execute skills well because your tension gets in the way of a smooth performance, and when you stumble, the underlying tension gets magnified in a very unpleasant way.

My reaction to reading your original post is that, if you are good enough at the skills not to panic if you get a little water in your mask, then just go diving. Do some easy dives -- shallow, safe dives in quiet water. Recapture the joy, the flying sensation, and the wonder of the undersea world. As you begin to relax and savor being underwater, THEN challenge yourself with a skill or two.

After I failed to pass Fundies, I got wound up in trying to improve the things I did poorly. Several dives were spent just trying to get stuff right. Things just got worse, and I got discouraged and very self-critical. The joy went out of diving for a short time. I got very good advice from a couple of valued friends . . . They told me to quit practicing and just dive for a while. They were entirely right, and what was funny was that, as I dove for fun, some of the things I was trying to perfect improved themselves.

 

[annlaur]

Lynne
I know exactly what you mean. I had the hardest time doing the mask removal skill in a few feet of water with the instructor in Marseille, and even when I managed it I was struggling not to panic. During the following dive someone kicked my mask off at 15 m (45 ft) and I replaced it with no problem. The next day, though, back to practicing skills and even before I start flooding my mask I feel my heart pounding... Go figure !

As for being grateful for the anxiety as it keeps me aware... I agree to that to some extent. A little bit of anxiety might help to dive safe, but too much of it puts someone in jeopardy if it's not controlled, as it impairs judgement and decision making.

Anyways, I wanted to thank you all again for the great answers and feedback, and let you know that a couple SBers living in Europe have PMed me and offered their help. I'm really looking forward to getting wet again and meeting people from the board.

Good dives to all
Anne-Laure

 

[Frog Dude]

There are 2 drills that may help you lose you apprehension you feel when diving.
When you take a shower, wash your face and hair first and then wear your mask and snorkel for the rest of your shower. You want the mask and snorkel to feel natural on your face when you are wet. Yes, every shower.
This sounds silly I know but it WILL work.
After a week of snorkel showers, fill your mask with water and put it on you face.
Tilt you head up as if you were looking forward. You can keep your eyes closed if it helps. Try to keep the water in for a count of 5 and then purge it like you were taught.
Do this when you start your shower and again before you get out.
In about a week when you are comfortable for the full five count and purging, but your snorkel in and try breathing through it with the water still in your mask.
Again the 5 count then purge.
Work up to 1 minute with water in the mask, breathing through the snorkel.
Don’t get discouraged if you can’t do it right away and don’t let one setback stop you from progressing. You want to teach your brain that a flooded mask is nothing to get excited about. Also that you can still breath with a flooded mask.
Keep us posted on you progress or PM me if you like. The other drill I will tell you about when you have mastered the flooded mask.

Frog Dude
Trying to be useful as well as ornamental.

 

[Frog Dude]

The second drill I was going to tell you about is now posted in the general diving section under Brain Diving. You will develop confidence the more you are exposed to an activity. The flooded mask drills are something you can practice anywhere and is a safer alterative than trying in a pool.

Frog Dude
Experience is a wonderful thing.
It allows you to recognize a mistake before you make it again.

 

[annlaur]

Thanks for the advice.
It's funny, I never had any trouble with water on my face while taking a shower (I even have to restrain myself from washing my hair every day, because I love that feeling). But it's a whole different thing with a mask and snorkel on. So unnatural... I've only done it twice so far, though. Can't wait to try the flooded-mask drill but I don't want to rush it.

I will keep you posted on my progress.

Anne-Laure

 

[ChrisA]

Thanks for the advice....... So unnatural... I've only done it twice so far, though. Can't wait to try the flooded-mask drill but I don't want to rush it.

You are answering your own question. Anything you have only done a few times would feel un-natural. After 100 times it becomes rotine. The trick is to find water near where you live and dive there often. I can't imagine anyone who dives only a few times a year on vacation ever gainning and retaining much in the way of skills. The answer is dive, dive, dive.. and then do some more

I wonder about not being able to take a mask off in a pool. Don't we learn to swim in a pool as kids with no masks? By the time we start to learn scuba I'd think that most of us would have been swimming around in pools with no masks for years and having the mask _on_ would be the new experiance. Maybe that is the way to think of it: When you have the mask off think of yourself as a 9 year old kid diving to the bottom for coins.

 

[Storm]

Ann-Laure

First off I'm not going to blow smoke up your backside. (It's the last thing you need after having a truly bad diving experience). You've had a really bad diving experience, and have suffered a hit to both your diving confidence, and your in-water comfort.

The road back is not short, nor is it going to be easy, buit it is NOT insurmountable. I know as I have been there. My eighth dive was a trust me 100 footer that, through a combination of my own stupidity, and an inept DI had me OOA, at 80 feet, and wondering by 60 feet if I was going to be able to say goodbye to my dive buddy, (who happened to be my wife).

It shook the hell out of both my self confidence, and my confidence in the whole dive instruction industry....AS IT SHOULD.

It took an entire off-season (eight months) of practice, pool sessions, and reflection to put me on the road back to open water diving.

Here's the short if it.

You've had your confidence shaken....justifiably so. How do you gain that confidence back.....gets wet, or get out. It's a simple as that. Find a dive buddy (preferably a qualified local dive professional with a good reputation), and start, in a confined water setting, with the basics. S drills, buoyancy are good to work on, but even if you just spend 30 minutes, lying on the bottom of a pool blowing bubbles, and can maintain a relaxed breathing pattern, and not feel any anxiety, you'll find yourself on the right road. Join your local dive club and dive with them...both confined and OW dives.

Start an Incident Dive Log, within your dive log. Write down every aspect, mistake and error in judgement you THINK you made and the one’s you think your DM's made. Talk to the local experienced divers, and dive professionals about your incident, and your panic attack. Write down their observations in your log.

You will find that your road back will not be as long as you may fear, but here's an important tip. Once you've overcome the lingering effects of those bad dives (only after you've fully recovered and are diving confidently again), review your Incident dive log at regular intervals. This will keep all the mistakes and judgemental errors fresh in your mind so you'll be able to improve your situational awareness, and hence become a better and safer diver.

I've been down the road you're currently on, and have turned it around myself....so will you. If you want to talk, PM me.

One final gruesome note (but it should be mentioned).

Be prepared, mentally and emotionally for the potential for it NOT to come back. It's sad, but a possibility. I know of at leas two experienced divers who packed it in after having a serious near miss. However, most diver recover from these types of incidents…I am sure you will as well.

Do not worry if you feel your confidence is shaken….most divers’ confidence would be as well. It normal…in fact a little apprehension, if controlled and dealt with appropriately, before each dive will keep you on your edge, and that’s a good thing..

Good luck and safe dives.

 

[annlaur]

My eighth dive was a trust me 100 footer that, through a combination of my own stupidity, and an inept DI had me OOA, at 80 feet, and wondering by 60 feet if I was going to be able to say goodbye to my dive buddy, (who happened to be my wife).

Hew ! And I thought I had a bad experience... Glad you made it.
I've actually been contacted by a SBer who's also a dive instructor living in France, and he's offered to take me on a few dives in the Med to help me get started again. We're supposed to meet around coffee next week, see how we can work it out and I can't wait.
I'm also going to sign up with a local dive association, and I hope they'll let me do just what you mention in your post : stay down at the bottom of the pool, just lay, working on my breathing and buoyancy. That plus the shower drills should help.

Another question for you SBers : a friend of mine (who used to dive) has mentionned taking up yoga. Now I'm a really busy girl and have never felt an interest for this, but if it really helps, I'm willing to give it a shot. Anyone has done it ? Does it really help you "control" your mind ?

Thanks again everyone for your posts. SB is great (except it's so hard to press the log out button and get back to work...)

Cheers to all
Anne-Laure

PS : My log book is already sort of an incident dive book. From dive 1 I've filled it with everything I experienced U/W : sights, marine life, weights needed, equipment, problems I had, how I felt, comments about the Instructor or DM, things to work on... I've been laughed at as most people just seem to fill in their depth and BT, but I like the idea of a real dive diary.

 

[mislav]

From dive 1 I've filled it with everything I experienced U/W : sights, marine life, weights needed, equipment, problems I had, how I felt, comments about the Instructor or DM, things to work on... I've been laughed at as most people just seem to fill in their depth and BT, but I like the idea of a real dive diary.

That's what it's there for! I do the same thing and I know some other that do it, too. Never worry about that and continue to do it. Those who laugh probably can't remember much of what happened on their dives - we can.