Rude Divers on the Boat

[Doctorfish]

Texasguy, I disagree.

Wealth does not buy social adjustment or good behavior. Often the opposite. Rich people can be incredibly self absorbed, selfish and entitled.
Rude behavior is not unique to any one social class.

 

[Texasguy]

Texasguy, I disagree.

Wealth does not buy social adjustment or good behavior. Often the opposite. Rich people can be incredibly self absorbed, selfish and entitled.
Rude behavior is not unique to any one social class.

I disagree with you disagreeing with me.

You are talking about snobby people. Yes, there is that. But most of it is passive aggressive. Then you have people who call 911 when their hamburger comes not the way they ordered it form a drive-through and it is not the higher class who does this, believe me. Don't have to be rich to feel entitled. What about self absorbed people who spit in the floor or draw in a restroom? You are talking about qualities that every social class can have. My point is that wealthier people have less of that on display.

You bring up selfish? Really? That is like the most common quality anyone can have. The only difference is lower class will tell you to go f-k yourself and, perhaps, will want to fight you, higher class of people will maintain civility to save everyone's face, even if they are selfish, it is how they were brought up.

I'll give you an example. Hell's kitchen, a guy is pissing on the wall. Two outcomes, people will either ignore him because they piss there too or will verbally attack him and possibly kick the **** out of him mob style. In Hamptons people will totally ignore the guy because they were brought up not to note vulgar behavior and not to succumb to such. Image is everything. Sure, they might call the police but there is NO open confrontation and it is my point. If a higher class person wants to upset you, it is likely to be done in non-confrontational passive aggressive way.

 

[mikeycanuk]

Texasguy, I disagree.

Wealth does not buy social adjustment or good behavior. Often the opposite. Rich people can be incredibly self absorbed, selfish and entitled.
Rude behavior is not unique to any one social class.

That reminds me of something that happened one the way out to French Cay from Provo. We were looking at all the fancy houses and hotels when someone commented that place was like $1000+ a night. To which the "rich dude" snorts "that's where we are staying". I figured when I first saw the large dive knife strapped to his ankle, something was up with this guy. What really bugged us was his son was 12-13 and ours was 11 and there was an attempt at communication between the boys before rich dad stopped his son cold. I guess communicating with the commoners is verboten...?? Even my offer of help was refused when he got back on the boat. Sheesh. Fall down on your own next time. He was easily ignored but why be such a di8k?

 

[KevinG58]

In my experience over the year, it seems there's usually one or two. Though usually it's more unaware behavior, than things done out of rudeness. Maybe I give too much credit but I know a few times someone has pointed out something I was doing. D'oh! I'm that guy?

The one thing that will burn my boat is the buddy / friend of a diver that insists on talking to them while they are gearing up, and stand in my station-space to do it. It's like, you're going to see them in an hour! Clear the deck! If you are helping them gear up, shouldn't you stand in front of them? I get stepping to each side but then move back after the scan/adjustment, eh? Even then I try and tell myself don't let them ruin my dive / day, it's just a few minutes inconvenience.

Dive boat decks can be crowded. Lots of gear, people flailing to get into or out of exposure protection and their harness & BCDs. Some contact may happen. On multi-day trips the rhythm usually gets worked out quite naturally, people time their gearing up and congestion is reduced. This can be done on shorter trips and smaller boats, by talking ahead of time maybe on the ride out to the site?

Nudity? Well that's a new one on me. I have seen a few accidental flashes (no, I'm not that guy in any of those cases). It doesn't bug me but I understand mileage varies.

Once at Coco View I saw a guy that would make very rapid course and depth changes, often colliding with other divers. On the swim in from drop-off dives I saw him twice swim directly over divers hugging the bottom and checking it out, in the front yard. I do think a divemaster spoke to him because he got much better, very suddenly.

In the end I think these behaviors are in the very small minority. Don't let the few ruin a great sport for you. Dive on.

 

[dmoore19]

One would think the equalizer would be getting out of the water and having that snot hanging out of your nose and your hair is mess up. I guess not.

On the live aboards I have been on it was fairly easy to get away from jackasses like that. The other end of the table, a different table, the back of the boat, a different deck. There was 1 that I just couldn't stand to be around. She was easily avoided. I do admit that I had a discussion with her and we determined that further communication would not be necessary. It became easier to stay away after that.

 

[DivemasterDennis]

Learn how to scuba dive they said. You'll make new friends they said. I think they were lying.

While I have made good friends with a few divers over the last few months and a few great DM's and Instructors I think I am batting a 1000 for sharing boats with genuine rude divers. I've had a fellow diver on a boat lose his ever loving mind, because I used my alternate during a safety stop after biting through the tabs on my primary during the dive. According to him I should have had a snorkel too and I was putting my perma buddy in danger by using the alternate. In fifteen feet (5 meter ) of water he was in so much danger. The DM did step in on that one.

I've had a diver tug my regulator hose to get my attention when my attention wasn't really that mandatory (they weren't my buddy, they weren't in trouble and I have seen a filefish before).

I had an older lady tell me in a round about way that I shouldn't be diving with more experienced divers like her because I got low on air at 55 minutes after a pretty deep dive and we all had to ascend. Like those five minutes were the ruin of her vacation.

And I will never forget the woman who got buck naked in front of my husband because obviously wearing anything under a wet suit is not mandatory.

But this last guy took the cake. I found a cute little cowfish, posing all nice in front of a barrel sponge, so I proceeding to get myself in position for a nice shot, trying my hardest not to scare the little guy. This diver actually shoved me out of the way, using both hands in order to line himself up for a shot. Probably scaring the crap out of the cowfish and totally freaking me out.


So what can you do? I guess I can tell the dive op I won't dive with this person anymore? But they do every dive daily so I won't be diving for a while. I can tell them there actions are inappropriate, but if an adult doesn't know that shoving another adult or getting naked isn't right I'm sure me telling them isn't going to help. I guess I can go to another dive op, but I otherwise like the op.

I have only been diving five months, so it really seems like I have gotten lucky with this boat mates, or is this par for the course and I should just take up shore diving?

What to do with really rude divers?

I have several suggestions, all set out in our books, The Scuba Snobs' Guide to Diving Etiquette, and the Scuba Snobs' Guide to Diving Etiquette, Book 2. It sounds like you are ready for them. Any online book store, paperback or e book.
DivemasterDennis

 

[nimoh]

I disagree with you disagreeing with me.

You are talking about snobby people. Yes, there is that. But most of it is passive aggressive. Then you have people who call 911 when their hamburger comes not the way they ordered it form a drive-through and it is not the higher class who does this, believe me. Don't have to be rich to feel entitled. What about self absorbed people who spit in the floor or draw in a restroom? You are talking about qualities that every social class can have. My point is that wealthier people have less of that on display.

You bring up selfish? Really? That is like the most common quality anyone can have. The only difference is lower class will tell you to go f-k yourself and, perhaps, will want to fight you, higher class of people will maintain civility to save everyone's face, even if they are selfish, it is how they were brought up.

I'll give you an example. Hell's kitchen, a guy is pissing on the wall. Two outcomes, people will either ignore him because they piss there too or will verbally attack him and possibly kick the **** out of him mob style. In Hamptons people will totally ignore the guy because they were brought up not to note vulgar behavior and not to succumb to such. Image is everything. Sure, they might call the police but there is NO open confrontation and it is my point. If a higher class person wants to upset you, it is likely to be done in non-confrontational passive aggressive way.

None of this really applies to any dive boats (expensive or inexpensive). If I were to pee on the deck, I would get a direct "eeewww! use the head for that!". I am pretty sure nobody would ignore me, nobody would punch me and nobody would call the police

 

[Steve_C]

None of this really applies to any dive boats (expensive or inexpensive). If I were to pee on the deck, I would get a direct "eeewww! use the head for that!". I am pretty sure nobody would ignore me, nobody would punch me and nobody would call the police

On a couple boats I use frequently it says no wet wetsuits in the head. Better to do it in the water and do a suit flush before getting on the boat.

---------- Post added April 7th, 2015 at 02:11 PM ----------

Higher social class? I may buy that they are less likely to belch at the dinner table. However, friendly? Probably not. My observation is that those who consider themselves higher class are less friendly. Too worried about blowing their cool by starting a conversation. They are much less likely to talk to strangers in their group or go out of their way to be accepting. There are many exceptions of course but I have seen this behavior every where from churches to five star resorts to country clubs and in several countries. Unless they think you have "status" and then they can get all chummy. My experience anyway.

Social consciousness certainly does not apply to their driving on the highways.

 

[Hickdive]

But this last guy took the cake. I found a cute little cowfish, posing all nice in front of a barrel sponge, so I proceeding to get myself in position for a nice shot, trying my hardest not to scare the little guy. This diver actually shoved me out of the way, using both hands in order to line himself up for a shot. Probably scaring the crap out of the cowfish and totally freaking me out.

That's an easy one to deal with; simply fin away, over their head, flailing and flapping your fins (hands too if you wish). An "accidental" swatting around the head and in the face with your fin tip, the viz ruined and the subject scared away and they'll soon learn to wait until you've moved off before risking being in your space again. If they complain back on the boat just apologise and blame your "inexperience". :blinking:

 

[MXGratefulDiver]

Higher social class? I may buy that they are less likely to belch at the dinner table. However, friendly? Probably not. My observation is that those who consider themselves higher class are less friendly. Too worried about blowing their cool by starting a conversation. They are much less likely to talk to strangers in their group or go out of their way to be accepting. There are many exceptions of course but I have seen this behavior every where from churches to five star resorts to country clubs and in several countries. Unless they think you have "status" and then they can get all chummy. My experience anyway.

Social consciousness certainly does not apply to their driving on the highways.

That's not been my experience at all. In fact, the wealthiest diver I know personally would probably be Calvin Tang ... and he's one of the nicest people you could ever share a dive boat with. Great diver and underwater photographer too ...

... Bob (Grateful Diver)