Post Your Pretty Funny Stuff Here

[inventor]

After a local man went missing for 4 days the police launched an investigation. Apparently he came in off the road and promptly forgot his anniversary. His wife being very upset told him that the next day their had better be something in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in less than 6 seconds. She later admitted to police that the next day there was indeed a package with a bow in the driveway. When she opened it she found a brand new bathroom scale. It appears she is still working out a deal with police to lead them to the body.

 

[inventor]

The Voca People - YouTube

 

[inventor]

Oh, and this...

The Llama Song | Flash Videos

 

[Jax]

The Voca People - YouTube


Can't figure out how to imbed the video.

Oh, and this...

The Llama Song | Flash Videos

I forget what works for flash.

 

[inventor]

Tarun tarah! I is getting edumicated.

 

[dmoore19]

[video=youtube;nGeKSiCQkPw]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGeKSiCQkPw[/video]

 

[Doc Harry]

Q: Why do scuba divers roll backwards off a boat?

A: Because if they rolled forwards they'd still be in the boat

 

[WOODMAN]

A man picked up a cab and told the driver where he wanted to go. They took off, and a few minutes later the man changed his mind and decided to go somewhere else. He reached over and tapped the driver on the shoulder to give him the new destination, and suddenly the driver shrieked, and jammed on the brakes. The cab spun around twice, nearly missing a hapless passing truck, and came to rest on the median with it's nose up against a lamp pole. The driver was hyperventilating in the front seat, and the passenger was scared silly. :shocked2: He said to the driver "I'm so sorry- I didn't mean to startle you like that!" The driver replied "No, sir, it's not you. You see, this is my first day on the job as a cab driver, and I spent the previous 30 years working for a mortuary as a hearse driver..."

 

[AlbertaDan]

A couple that had ben married for quite a while used to fight about everything. They got along like cats and dogs. One day this old couple (we'll call them Frank and Helen) were having one of their usual fights but it turned worse than normal. Frank told Helen, "When you die I'm going to dance on your grave next to your new headstone. Here Lies helen cold as usual"

Helen as usual had one of her snappy comebacks.

"That shows how little you know. Women live longer than men. So I'll be dancing on your grave next to your new headstone.
Here lies Frank stiff at last"

 

[mlkco]

SEX AFTER DEATH?

A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and inform the other if there was sex after death. Their biggest fear was that there was no after-life at all.. After a long life together, the husband was the first to die. True to his word, he made the first contact:
"Sue..........Sue"


"Is that you, George?"


"Yes, I've come back like we agreed."

"That's wonderful!? What's it like?"



"Well, I get up in the morning, I have sex. I have breakfast and then it's off to the golf course. I have sex again, bathe in the warm sun, and then have sex a couple of more times. Then I have lunch (you'd be proud - lots of greens). Another romp around the golf course, then pretty much have sex the rest of the afternoon.

After supper, it's back to golf course again. Then it's more sex until late at night. I catch some much-needed sleep and then the next day it starts all over again"

"Oh, George, are you in Heaven?"
No, I'm a rabbit in Kansas.”