Hi all,
I am new to diving and finished my open water about three weeks ago. Unforunatelly my check out dives did not turn out the way I wished they had and I would like to ask the more experienced folks for some advice, since this experience messed really bad with my mind and confidence in persuing diving.
I do not want this post to become endless, so I will try to cut it best I can.
I was always fascinated by the beauties of the underwater world but I always had a lot of respect for scuba diving and there has always been some kind of feeling/anxiety that kept me from trying scuba. Recently I kept thinking a lot about it and if it was a §Çear that resulted from not knowing anything about scuba (like the typical Ÿhat if©å ) or just my immagination how I ÅØould feel.
I took a ŵry Scuba class (pool) prior to my open water to find out how I really felt about it and if I wanted to take the class. I talked about my concerns with the instructor and was doing totally fine. I did not have any problems with any of the skills during ÅÕry scuba or my OW sessions . It was a 2 week course, I had a really good instructor!, we were only two students and got a LOT of personal attention.
After finishing the pool sessions I got really nervous about going into the ocean for the check out dives, I donÃÕ know, pool was not = ocean for me. I was worried about some kind of situation coming up that I would not know how to handle. I talked to my instructor, thought he should know.
On our first dive, I was nervous, but we really took it slow and he always watched us like a hawk. We did some skills on the surface,descended, did some skills at the bottom, went for a swim, no problems.
On our second dive I was still nervous and my breathing was far away from §Ïormal? At about 15 our instructor asked me to remove my mask, put it back on and clear it, like I have done several times in the pool sessions without any problems. He had us do some other skills like clearing our masks on that dive before, without any problems.
I removed my mask and realized, that I was not breathing at all. My heart was pounding so hard as if it would want to jump right out of my chest. I remembered the §Ïever hold your breath ringing in my head and tried to take a deep breath but my chest felt so tight that I could not get a breath out of that regulator. Instead I had a lot of water entering (through my nose, I guess). I tried again©Ôame result. At that point I simply lost it, I could not see, I could not breath, done, I bolted to the surface. The instructor immediatelly grabed and held on to my BCD on the way to the surface. It seemed like an eternity. He inflated my BC on the surface, grabed my hand and insisted that I looked at him. After I had calmed down, he told me that I had spit out my regulator under water I had not even realized.
I will never forget this feeling of panic, it is the worse I have ever felt.
I felt ashamed that I had comletely lost control over myself and have put him in this situation. All I could say was that I was sorry.
I finished all three dives that day and the two following the next day. Yes, I know, maybe I should have called it, but I know ,if I had, I would probably not have gone back into the water . The instructor had me clear my mask a lot with no pressure at all and I finally took of that mask at the end of our last dive after refusing a couple of times before. Not because I was comfortable with it, but because I thought, if I do not do it now, it will just get worse.
I got certified that day, but I was not ready to go out there again unless I had myself under controll and with an experienced buddy. My instructor offered to take me out on some dives to work on skills if I wanted to or just to become more comfortable.
The first week after the check out dives I was seriously considering quiting, because every time I thought about diving my heart started pounding against chest again. My memories of that weekend are more like a dream I had than reality. I felt really misserable. It got better after I finally decided not to quit and work through it.
I read up on a lot of stuff (including all the good advice on scuba board, thanks for that) to find out what was ÅØrong with me and worked hard on my mask skills during the last few weeks. I spend hours in the pool (still do, to keep going)and in shallow open water (kneeling on the bottom at 5 with a friendÃÔ tank). I went on a dive with my instructor a couple of days ago, he cut of 4h of his time to go on a 45 min. dive with me! Yes, I did take of my mask on that dive, and yes, it took some effort, but I was in control. I think I have improved a lot, since I can now take of my mask in the ocean without the panicky feeling coming up, controlling my breathing and staying calm while doing the skill. I think the most important change for me was, I now keep my eyes OPEN under water, even if it is not sharp, at least I can see.
But even though, I have some serious questions, that are eating me up.
1) Are there many students having these kind of problems/feelings?
2) Will I be more prone to panic again in the future, if I already panicked once? I know that panic does not belong under water. This leading to my next question.
3) Should I be diving at all? I had somebody telling me, źou should not be in the water at all? I do not want to quit, but I do not want to be a hazard to myself or even worse my buddy!
Sorry, for the long post, but I would really appreciate some advice.
Thanks.
