No more insta-buddies

[FritzCat66]

I wonder why this guy felt the need to buddy up, when he obviously had no plans to remain buddied?

I'm usually by myself on the dive boats, meaning I might be there with some pals, but not particularly buddied up with anyone. I like it that way, and am certified and equipped for solo. I don't want to be anyone's instabuddy nor do I want one of them to be my instabuddy.

Sounds like this guy basically has the same attitude, but for some reason still feels the need to "buddy up" at least in name if not in deed. Perhaps he feels that the line item "buddy" must simply have a check next to it before getting into the water.

People who want/need/expect dive buddies should say so and make an effort to be good dive buddies. People who don't want/need/expect a dive buddy should say so and take their solo diving responsibly. The problem occurs when someone from either party claims to be the other.

One exception: Some narrowminded dive ops still insist that "all divers have a buddy" before entering the water. In those situations, I have sometimes connected with another odd-man-out diver just to satisfy the dive op's checkbox. But in that case I make it clear that we're "buddies" on SOSD terms only (same ocean, same day).

Everyone just needs to be clear on their intentions regarding the whole dive buddy thing. Sounds to me as if that's this guy's greatest failure.

 

[donhealy]

I've had many insta buddies over the last 18 years. Most were good but a few; well..... Its a good thing that I have good skill sets and am tolerant (well kind of).

Bubbletrouble has got it right. I always ask virtually all the questions. When you do, it gives you a much better understanding of what to expect during the dive. It also allows you to size up the insta buddy.

Two things I always go over are hand signals, dive plan and what to do if we are separated.

 

[orm]

Personally I think that Insta-buddy is a bit of a derogatory term. Why not just Buddy?

Anyways, people's experience and skill sets are hugely different, we're all here to learn regardless of the number of dives logged ... some people need more learning than others granted, but we're all here in the big Scuba boat of life, rubbing elbows and trying to get on.

Can you sing? How good of a diver are you, are you a good driver? All subjective responses, it's up to us as 'experienced' insta-buddies ourselves to assess and deal with what we're presented with.

 

[Pauly854]

They say that the only stupid question is the one not asked. So having been away from diving for a few years, I am not familiar with the term DIR. Help!

 

[Pauly854]

GOOGLE answered my question. I should have "Done it Right" before I asked.

 

[knowone]

The "R" is actually code for "their way."

 

[drbill]

As someone who did over 150 dives with instabuddies before finding the same dive system - I can't agree more. Standardization of training and equipment makes diving with "strangers" within our system a very easy and pleasant experience.

Sigh, I guess that means we are not made for one another, Kathy (as dive buddies)!

Seriously, I once calculated my "incident" rate diving solo vs diving with a buddy (including my favorite buddies who I've never had a problem with). It was 20X higher diving with a buddy, and MUCH higher if diving with an insta-buddy. I ceased that practice a long time ago (even if the lady is intelligent and gorgeous) unless I'm on a dive boat and have to dive buddied up per the captain.

 

[Eric Sedletzky]

Actually the whole PADI training philosophy is SUPPOSED to be about a standardized protocol to follow so any PADI diver from any country should be able to buddy up with another PADi diver from anywhere and be on the same page, but it doesn't seem to work like that does it?
Not that I'm a proponent of PADI, quite to the contrary, but I'm just saying that PADI had that in mind a good 25 years before DIR was even thought of.

I think the guy (with his 200 dives) was probably a solo diver mostly, probably never had any close calls or threatening situations, had a certail level of comfort in the water, and really didn't know how to be a good buddy. It sounds like he was independantly minded and had the same ocean same day attitude. He probably had some bad habits that he just made do with, and figured a loose grouping was good enough and if you were to have said something about your concerns afterward he'd be like "What! ?".

 

[on_two_wheels]

As you guys could probably tell from the lack of recent involvement, I've kinda moved on from this topic. One thing to point out: If "insta-buddy" is derogatory, might consider the sensitivity level. That's like saying referring to a brown haired woman a brunette as derogatory. Is it not a buddy that was not a buddy before you got on the boat? They are made in an instant (i.e. "can I buddy up with you") and are then a buddy.

As for why not just buddy, people I know and dive with are my "dive buddies." There IS a difference between those divers and a diver I've known 20 minutes on a boat. Why "buddy?" Why not dive mate? Why not dive friend? Words people....just words. Hell, I was his insta-buddy.

 

[Tigerman]

As you guys could probably tell from the lack of recent involvement, I've kinda moved on from this topic. One thing to point out: If "insta-buddy" is derogatory, might consider the sensitivity level. That's like saying referring to a brown haired woman a brunette as derogatory. Is it not a buddy that was not a buddy before you got on the boat? They are made in an instant (i.e. "can I buddy up with you") and are then a buddy.

As for why not just buddy, people I know and dive with are my "dive buddies." There IS a difference between those divers and a diver I've known 20 minutes on a boat. Why "buddy?" Why not dive mate? Why not dive friend? Words people....just words. Hell, I was his insta-buddy.

BEING the insta-buddy you should have thick enough skin to handle something as benign as being called an insta-buddy.
I know for sure that I wouldnt travel alone to far away places if I didnt have a minimum of confidence..