Barracuda2
Contributor
I thought you guys might get a laugh out of this.
If you don't laugh out loud after you read this you are in a coma! This
>is even funnier when you realize it's real! Next time you have a bad day at
>work ... think of this guy, Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global
>Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling
>rigs.
>
> Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent
> it to radio stat ion 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne, Indiana, who was
>sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won.
>
>
> Hi Sue, Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.
>
> Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down
>lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you
>realize it's not so bad after all.
>
> Before I can tell you what happ ened to me, I first must bore you with a
>few technicalities of my job.
>
> As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to
>the office. It's a wetsuit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So
>what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water
>heater.
>
> This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats
>it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver thro ugh
>a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose.
>
> Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times
>with no complaints.. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working,
>is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wetsuit. This floods my
>whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.
>
> Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to
>itch. So, of course, I scratched it.
>
> This only made things worse.
>
> Within a few seconds my butt started to burn I pulled the hose out from
>my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened.
>The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit.
>Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick
>to it.
>
> However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate.
>
> When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was act ually grinding the
>jellyfish into the crack of my butt I informed the dive supervisor of my
>dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the
>fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.
>
> Needless to say I aborted the dive..
>
> I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops
>totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my
>chamber dry decompression.
>
> When I arrived at the surface,&n bsp;I was wearing nothing
> but my brass helmet.
>
> As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running
>down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt
>as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't
>poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.
> So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much
>worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved&n bsp;up your butt.
>
> Now repeat to yourself,
>
> "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job."
>
> Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself,
> Is this a jellyfish bad day?
>
> May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!!!
Laura Ritterbach, LSW
Diversion Foster Care of Ohio, Inc.
Assessor
diversionfostercare@fuse.net
If you don't laugh out loud after you read this you are in a coma! This
>is even funnier when you realize it's real! Next time you have a bad day at
>work ... think of this guy, Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global
>Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling
>rigs.
>
> Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent
> it to radio stat ion 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne, Indiana, who was
>sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won.
>
>
> Hi Sue, Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.
>
> Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down
>lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you
>realize it's not so bad after all.
>
> Before I can tell you what happ ened to me, I first must bore you with a
>few technicalities of my job.
>
> As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to
>the office. It's a wetsuit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So
>what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water
>heater.
>
> This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats
>it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver thro ugh
>a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose.
>
> Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times
>with no complaints.. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working,
>is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wetsuit. This floods my
>whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.
>
> Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to
>itch. So, of course, I scratched it.
>
> This only made things worse.
>
> Within a few seconds my butt started to burn I pulled the hose out from
>my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened.
>The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit.
>Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick
>to it.
>
> However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate.
>
> When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was act ually grinding the
>jellyfish into the crack of my butt I informed the dive supervisor of my
>dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the
>fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.
>
> Needless to say I aborted the dive..
>
> I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops
>totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my
>chamber dry decompression.
>
> When I arrived at the surface,&n bsp;I was wearing nothing
> but my brass helmet.
>
> As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running
>down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt
>as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't
>poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.
> So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much
>worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved&n bsp;up your butt.
>
> Now repeat to yourself,
>
> "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job."
>
> Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself,
> Is this a jellyfish bad day?
>
> May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!!!
Laura Ritterbach, LSW
Diversion Foster Care of Ohio, Inc.
Assessor
diversionfostercare@fuse.net
