going to the bar

[Mako Mark]

This guy was lonely and so he decided life would be more fun if he had a
pet. So he went to the pet shop and told the owner that he wanted to buy
an unusual pet.

After some discussion, he finally bought a centipede (100-legged
crawler) which came in a little white box to use for his house.

He took the box back home, found a good location for the box, and
decided he would start off by taking his new pet to the pub to have a
drink.

So he asked the centipede in the box, "Would you like to go to Frank's
with me and have a beer?" But there was no answer from his new pet.

This bothered him a bit, but he waited a few minutes and then asked him
again, "How about going to the pub and having a drink with me?"

But again, there was no answer from his new friend and pet. So he waited
a few minutes more, thinking about the situation. He decided to ask him
one more time; this time putting his face up against the centipede's
house and shouting, "HEY, IN THERE! WOULD YOU LIKE TO GO TO FRANK'S
PLACE AND HAVE A DRINK WITH ME?"


A little voice came out of the box:...........

I heard you the first time! I'm just putting my freaking shoes on."

 

[pennypue]

A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool.
After catching his breath he ordered a banana split.
The waitress asked kindly, "Crushed nuts?"
No," he replied, "arthritis."

And Mark,

If a man speaks in the forest,
and there is no woman there to hear him,
is he still wrong?

DUH, of course, he's wrong. He spoke. Is this a trick question?

 

[Kayla]

LMAO you guys.... too funny! Thanks, I needed that this morning! :dazzler1:

 

[TwoTanks]

And Mark,

If a man speaks in the forest,
and there is no woman there to hear him,
is he still wrong?

DUH, of course, he's wrong. He spoke. Is this a trick question?

How about if he says "My wife was right, I should have brought a compass"

Is he still wrong?

 

[pennypue]

How about if he says "My wife was right, I should have brought a compass"

Is he still wrong?

Irrelevant, he was already wrong before he even spoke.

Wonderful clause.