Not for nuttin, but...
Flounder are rather dumb creatures. A flounders idea of hiding is to lay on the bottom and look like the bottom. Which, I will grant you, works remarkably well most of the time. However, when you have espyed Mr Flounder from on high, and gently floated downwards towards his humble hiding spot you will notice that Mr Flounder does nothing.
You see, Mr Flounder thinks you don't.
See that is.
Specifically, Mr Flounder thinks you can't see him, all lying there looking like the bottom. So instead of taking off as fast as his little flounder arse can swim, he lay's there on the bottom, perhaps softly whistling a little flouder ditty to himself, secure in the knowledge that you can't see thru his milleniums worth of evolutionary camoflage. Ah, but Mr Flounder has a brain the size of a milk-swollen grape-nut. Not a lot of ammunition to do battle against you, a blood thirsty red-blooded American male, resplendant in your $2000 worth on the latest and the greatest high tech gear your LDS and the internet can provide you! You've spent thousands of dollars on scuba gear and you are going to bring home dinner, damn it!!! It don't matter that that flounder is costing about $256.00/ once! He's YOUR'S. He's DINNER!!!!!! You're going to show your wife you still got it. Hell, afterward, you might just drive down to the Cape and go to the Mill Hill Club! You da man! You are a hunter! All of that going to the gym once a month is starting to pay off!
What to do? Do I try to measure him? Do I stab her with my spear? (Now THAT'S phallic imagery at it's finest! And notice the subtle change of gender so that PTN doesn't appear to be the Cambridge representative from the North American Man Fish Love Association!) Do I try to gram him by the gills and wrestle him into submission?
No indeed, young Jedi! Here is a trick from the old masters for you to try. Reach down to your catch bag and gently bring it up in front of you. Shake any lobsters inside towards the bottom. Open it up and lay it open wide in front of Mr/Mrs Flounder. Tap Mr/ Mrs Flounder on the arse and try to contain you giggles when he swims joyfully into your net.
Yup, that's right, flounder are dumb. They will swim into your catch bag for want of anything better to do. And the best part of that is, no holes in the fillets where you would have otherwise jabbed her with your spear. (Ohhh, that's not bad imagery either!)
Try it next time. It works. Garrrr-oooon- teeeeed!!!!
Paulthenurse
ps
Works on codfish, too.
Your milage at the Mill Hill Club may vary!
PTN
