'Fess up!

[Mako Mark]

Travelling in Nicaragua I decided I could wait untill the next town before using the bathroom, as the bus station one looked pretty damn gruesome and the next town was only an hour away.

It turned out that it was two and a half hours, and it turned into a full blown intestinal circus that I swear, to this day nearly ruptured something.

I managed to make it to the next town and stepped off the bus before all hell broke loose in my jeans and filled up my shoes.

The only saving grace was this was not in the middle of town and there was a storm drain nearby that I dissappeared into to decontaminate myself. I had a full pack of clean clothes and some soap, so apart from the shock of it all, it wasnt really all that embarrassing as no one really saw.

The funniest thing about it was that it traumatized my travelling partner more than me, he ate immodium like tic tacs for the rest of the trip.

 

[murphdivers286]

Here I go.

A partner and I were serving a warrant on a 25 years old male. When we got to the apartment, my partner found him hiding on the outside 2nd floor balcony. When I met him at the door, there was an older lady standing next to him. (so I thought). The warrant was for failure to pay child support. He tried to explain all about not having the money to get out and he would bring it in when he goes to work tomorrow, blah blah blah. While, I tried to be sympathic with him. I told him, "you could have your mother bring the money to the jail".

That went over like a f@&t in church. He looked at me and stated, "SHE IS NOT MY MOTHER, SHE IS MY WIFE!!!!". My face started to turn all different shades of red. I couldn't speak. I started to studder, "I I I"M SSSSORRY MA'M".

I still ended up arresting him, but the ride to the jail was very quiet. My partner got a real big kick out of it. To this day, I never assume anything anymore. Lesson learned.

 

[wstein]

My husband and I were having a rare private dinner in a little diner, when in walk 4 of our friends and piled into the booth with us.Before they had arrived i had been about to put my foot in my husbands lap...you know how that goes. Well the guys didn't leave and foolishly I decided to continue my massage. Finally they left! I asked my husband how he enjoyed it....when i saw the blank expression on his face, I understood the ear to ear grin on Toms.

DOH!!!!!

I have way to many embarassing stories to tell. Here is one, don't know if it is embarassing or just plain funny.

When I was in the Marine Corps, my unit was deployed over in the Med. There was this large joint NATO training op and my company was picked to play the part of aggressor forces on the the island of Sardinia. The Italian army was our taxi service while we were there. One night I woke to the urges of nature saying it is time to pee. Well I get up, and walk over to some of those willow tree's where the branchs hang all the way down to the ground. Well I step partically into the branchs and get ready to relieve myself when I hear this blood curdling scream from the tree. I part the branches and look down and there was 3 Italian soilders sleeping. Opppsieeeeeees

Paul

 

[newbie@scuby]

Seabear sorry about the experience, I went thru a similiar one with my x, but two teenage girls in our house with alcohol. According to him it was my fault, he was just trying to entertain them while I was at work. (their parents had let them come for a visit with us) try explaining that one.

Now for one more(in a long line of my f@@$^%ps..) The pantie incident I alluded to in the questions and answer game.

It started with miscommunacation I thought my date was going to call at 7, as it turned out I was supposed to meet him then. He called I dressed quickly and left for the diner, when I got I decided to run to the restroom--check my hair etc.. What I didn't realize was that a pair of my panties were stuck in my pants leg(I grab them straight from the dryer) and they fell out without me knowing right in front of the cash register. I took my time in the bathroom, only to come out and a total stranger tell me I had lost my panties. I thought it was a joke,so I ignored her. Then the waitress came to our table and told me, still thought it was a joke. Then people start staring, so I finially decide to play along(this is a place I frequented and they constantly pulled stunts) and I get up and announce OK u got me I play along. I go over and then I realize(Oh my god) they are mine. How do u finish a date after that?

 

[aussie_shark_bait]

Seabear sorry about the experience, I went thru a similiar one with my x, but two teenage girls in our house with alcohol. According to him it was my fault, he was just trying to entertain them while I was at work. (their parents had let them come for a visit with us) try explaining that one.

Now for one more(in a long line of my f@@$^%ps..) The pantie incident I alluded to in the questions and answer game.

It started with miscommunacation I thought my date was going to call at 7, as it turned out I was supposed to meet him then. He called I dressed quickly and left for the diner, when I got I decided to run to the restroom--check my hair etc.. What I didn't realize was that a pair of my panties were stuck in my pants leg(I grab them straight from the dryer) and they fell out without me knowing right in front of the cash register. I took my time in the bathroom, only to come out and a total stranger tell me I had lost my panties. I thought it was a joke,so I ignored her. Then the waitress came to our table and told me, still thought it was a joke. Then people start staring, so I finially decide to play along(this is a place I frequented and they constantly pulled stunts) and I get up and announce OK u got me I play along. I go over and then I realize(Oh my god) they are mine. How do u finish a date after that?

Well....how about you have seen my nickers now lets see yours????

 

[newbie@scuby]

Wish I would have thought of that, I did talk to a guy later who confessed that one day he was in Pizza Hut and went to put his jacket on, when he put his arm thru the sleeve a pair of his wife's panties flew onto the table next to him. Can u imagine asking those back or do u just run?

 

[SueMermaid]

Oh, and I had allowed myself to be set up on a blind date by a co-worker. Why, I do now know. I chalk it up to naivete.
I work in a bug lab, and at the time, I raised cat fleas for research. Yes, the little bitey things. I met this guy (who turned out to be SO WRONG in too many ways to mention here) for a beer at a local cantina. I sat across the table from him over my beer and quesailla, when a stray flea jumped out of my hair and onto the table right between us. It happens when you work with fleas sometimes they like to hitch a ride. (people don't get flea infestations tho, they much prefer cats and dogs).
Anyway, I loooked at the flea and calmly put my finger over it, and picked it off the table. I am still not sure if my date saw it, but honestly, I didn't really care.

 

[baltimoron]

c'mon!!! i want to hear more stories!!!! these are funny!!! don't be shy!

 

[SeaHunt]

I once met a friend of mine after work at a nearby watering hole. We’d been sitting at the bar throwing back a few when a friend of my friend joined us. By this time I’d had enough so that the mouth was engaged, but the brain wasn’t. I noticed that my friend’s friend was hitting heavy on the girl bartender. Well, she was as wide as she was tall, with a face only a mother could tolerate to look at. Anyway, this went on for sometime. When she left to serve others at the opposite end of the bar, I asked the guy why he was hitting on such a FUGLY woman.

His reply was, she’s not FUGLY, she’s my girlfriend.

 

[Scubaguy62]

See next post.