Buoyancy, trim and awareness of your self and your buddy are a lot different in a blue water night dive than they are on a reef or in a pond. In the story presented I find a few constriuctive suggestions. First- buddy diving. You should have functioned as a buddy team starting before the dive, discussing the plan and clarifying what each of your believed to be the plan. There was communication later, but limited. Second, ask question of the dive leader if there is uncertainity. The leaders have done this dive a bunch and what is routine for them is not for you. There are no dumb questions. Finally, it is rarely constructive when debriefing a dive to tell someone how "they could have been lost." I am all for a strong admonition on improper and dangerous conduct, but here, the impact of the comment (crying) was not what should have been the focus of the conversation. When doing a new or unique dive, always follow buddy dive protocal, and always ask plenty of questions of the dive leader before the dive and be sure you are on the3 same page. BTW, what pelagics did you see?
DivemasterDennis