Dumbest things you've seen a newbie diver do

[Mortis65]

I have one, self inflicted.
OWA, DrySuit. Practice dive in a pool getting used to my drysuit.

Forgot to hook up the inflater hose to my drysuit. Got in the water and tried to do the PADI boyancy using my drysuit. Needless to say, it wasn't pretty. My feet sloshed in the drysuit for bit as I walked out, and connected my hose.

 

[Jimmer]

I was at a dive with a group of us that had all been diving many years. We all got suited up and in the water, except one very experienced diver who was a bit behind us. After a few minutes on the shallow bottom, we ascended to see where he was. We saw a MASSIVE pool of water on the gound and a scattering of dive gear. We all started howling, when it dawned on us that the other fellow had jumped in with his drysuit COMPLETELY unzipped.

I'm not even sure how he got out on his own, but we found him on his back with his feet in the air, draining his drysuit.

That was the end to his diving for the rest of the day.

 

[DiverLS]

I was diving off the Vision, Truth Aquatics about 15 years ago. My dive buddy was in the bunk with the flu. I knew it was the flu because I did the bunk thing in day 3 while he dived.

Anyway, I was looking for an insta buddy. The conditions were not good. At the dive briefing, we were told to go down the anchor line and swim into the current. Well, I approached a young lady, reacently certified and asked her. She said she didn't think so. Well, I wanted to go so bad I pushed her to jump and she did. Right off the side and dropped straight down. I had no choice but to follow her.

Once she bounced off the bottom and got her bearings she saw a "swim through" so she belined to that. I could see her tank would hit and boy did it, sending shards of the reef in all directions.

I did get her to work her way into the current but she tired with the kicking, she refused to "finger walk" across the reef. When I spotted the boat above us, headed her to the anchor. Just as I was signalling her to head to the anchor she gave me the OOA sigh. Sigh.

So I tried to donate my octopus and she declined. WHAT? So I grabbed her guage. She had 700 lbs. So I signalled the direction to the anchor. She ignored it and pushed off the bottom, getting whipped off by the current.

She did manage to not exceed her LARGEST bubbles in her ascent. Again, I had not choice but to follow but used a safe ascent. Because the dive was short (20 min) and our max depth was about 35 feet, I did not do a safety stop.

When I surfaced, I swam against the current and reached her. She was waving madly for the boat to come pick us up. I could see the current line and knew we would make it if we tried. So I was signalling OK and she was asking for help. The crew gave up and sent the zodiac for us.

Once we were back in the boat, I asked her why she would not "finger walk?" She said "so I won't damage the reef." And I asked her why she bolted to the surface when she had 700 lbs. She said "I had to be on the surface with 500 and didn't think I had time. I also asked her to demonstrate the low on air and OOA signals. She said "what?"

So I learned, when she said she thought the conditions were too much for her, I should have listened. Even though she did some really stupid things, I did the worst. I pushed a diver into a situation after they said no.

 

[Ed Palma]

I was using a rental shortie that zipped up the front on my recent trip to Mexico and found after going in that I couldn't get the #$*#(% thing off by myself...lol. There was nothing I could grab that would let me start peeling it off. I'm in the process of buying my own equipment and top on my list is a wetsuit that I'll be able to put on and pull off by myself...lolol.

Kristopher

Oh how true! But for my case, I was in my LDS, looking to buy a vest with a hood (no zipper). You know how they say that you've got to make sure your exposure protection is the correct fit? Well, this one was a bit snug. As I started to peel it off, I started having difficulty as the whole thing was right around my head. My arms weren't free yet, and all I could think of was the possible reaction of people if they found me dead of asphyxiation in the changing room.

Was able to remove it by calming down a bit and removing it bit by bit before my air ran out.

 

[Ramsy]

I don't know if the person I saw do this was a "newbie" as he was wearing a drysuit, but on a boat dive, this person was so eager to get in the water that as soon as the boat dropped anchor, he asked and got permission from the divemaster to get in the water. However, he jumped in the water without his fins. He did not realize his mistake until I noticed his fins on the bench a few seconds after he took his giant stride and asked if he wanted his fins. At that point, he started to freak out a little and his regulator started to free flow. Unfortunately, he did not know how to stop a free flowing regulator, which added a little more anxiety to his situation, as people were yelling to him how to stop the free flowing regulator. After all of that, he ended up diving solo!

 

[Ramsy]

On another boat trip, an advanced open water class was taking place. Two of the students had opted to try drysuits. You could tell as they were wearing DUI drysuits with the "rental program" labels sewn on the neck of the suit. I watched as the class got its briefing from their instructor. As I watched, it struck me that one of the rented drysuits looked "off." It took me a minute to realize why it looked "off." The person had donned the drysuit backwards (i.e. like a wetsuit that zips up in the back.) I actually was quite amazed that he was able to do that as I would have thought it impossible to put your feet in the drysuit backwards. However, I can now say that I have seen it done. I politely told him that he was wearing the suit backwards and he quickly fixed it.

 

[fisheater]

On another boat trip, an advanced open water class was taking place. Two of the students had opted to try drysuits. You could tell as they were wearing DUI drysuits with the "rental program" labels sewn on the neck of the suit. I watched as the class got its briefing from their instructor. As I watched, it struck me that one of the rented drysuits looked "off." It took me a minute to realize why it looked "off." The person had donned the drysuit backwards (i.e. like a wetsuit that zips up in the back.) I actually was quite amazed that he was able to do that as I would have thought it impossible to put your feet in the drysuit backwards. However, I can now say that I have seen it done. I politely told him that he was wearing the suit backwards and he quickly fixed it.

Even more amazing that he could "quickly fix" wearing a DS backwards.

 

[Dave1981]

I saw someone turn up, and complete a 40m dive for the deep specialty first thing in the morning after being out drinking until 4am the night before. Then try to hide dcs symptoms due to not wanting everyone to know what they'd done. Ticket for 1 to the chamber after they passed out on the dock on the way in.

Another was a dive family on vacation, the kids were maybe 14-15 and doing AOW. They had their own gear which was the cheapest BC you've ever seen, coupled with the cheapest reg set and no alternate. So the first dive, the BC power inflator gets stuck on and corks the kid from about 15ft. For the deep dive next the instructor recommends shop BC and regs, no cost to rent. All brand new and good gear, the Dad says no way, has to use his own gear and as an ex navy diver he knows best, so sends the kid off on a 30m dive with no alternate and known faulty BC, they didn't even give it to the tech for a quick look. Dumb dad and I have no idea how the instructor even allowed it.

 

[Belce]

Not asking the question they have in their head.

 

[DiveDocMD]

Doing a Molasses Reef dive out of Key Largo. We were on a dive catamaran and, given the choppy conditions, there were only 3 divers. I was moderately experienced at the time and one of the other divers was a guy I had been buddied with a couple times earlier in the week. The third diver was a newbie and accompanied by 2 friends who were going to snorkel.

I like the feeling of rolling seas and, once through the cut, moved up to the front of one of the pontoons for a rocking ride. I had asked the boat captain to let me know when we were 20 minutes out from the dive site so I could be kitted up and ready to splash. The guy I knew was doing the same.

Our newbie and his friends sat near the back of the boat I guess to maximize the inhalation of engine exhaust.

At the captains signal 2 of the 3 of us started getting ready and things timed out just right so as soon as the boat tied up we were splashing. Our third, the newbie, just then started to get ready. After about 15 minutes noodling around under the boat he finally made it into the water and joined up with us. I started out in the lead meandering through the spur and groove reef and staying at around 35 to 40 feet. If you want to go deeper in that area you should bring a shovel.

I kept checking back to make sure the newbie was still with us until, on one check, he was gone. Crap! We made a quick survey of the area then a slow ascent to the surface. Called to the boat who told us he was with them and we could go on with our dive.

After a bottom time of 60 plus minutes we made our safety stop and got back on board where the captain was immediately casting off and heading back.

Our newbie was stretched out on one of the back benches, the contents of his stomach (apparently an all you can eat buffet) spewed out on the back deck.

Yes, he learned that the best way to minimize sea sickness is to minimize time on a rocking platform and get in the water as soon as possible.