Personally I'd try and drag it out for as long as you can before you have to get too commited.
Dating
- Thread starter ling
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Ling- that absolutely wonderful feeling of falling in love is a great experience, but according to scientific studies it may fade in a few months or a year. Of course the feeling is worth it IMHO!
What is important in a marriage is that the two people involved develop that deeper love for one another based on mutual respect that carries a couple on for years.
I know a couple with a story that really interested me. Mike said he didn't "love" Jan at the time they married, but he knew she was someone he wanted to commit himself to in marriage. He said that love would evolve over the years they were together. After 25+ years together they are still happily together and committed to the marriage.
Basing a decision for marriage on the initial feelings of "love" (often somewhat superficial responses like physical attraction) may not be enough for a marriage to last. However if the relationship evolves with mutual respect, "real" love that can cement the relationship can maintain the bonds.
So "love at first sight" may turn into lasting love in time given mutual respect, the commitment to make it work, etc.
Now you can all see why I'm still single! Too philosophical about it.
Dr. Bill
What is important in a marriage is that the two people involved develop that deeper love for one another based on mutual respect that carries a couple on for years.
I know a couple with a story that really interested me. Mike said he didn't "love" Jan at the time they married, but he knew she was someone he wanted to commit himself to in marriage. He said that love would evolve over the years they were together. After 25+ years together they are still happily together and committed to the marriage.
Basing a decision for marriage on the initial feelings of "love" (often somewhat superficial responses like physical attraction) may not be enough for a marriage to last. However if the relationship evolves with mutual respect, "real" love that can cement the relationship can maintain the bonds.
So "love at first sight" may turn into lasting love in time given mutual respect, the commitment to make it work, etc.
Now you can all see why I'm still single! Too philosophical about it.
Dr. Bill
cobaltbabe
Diva of the Deep
You have way too much time on your hands. I firmly believe that you have to have a physical attraction to the person you are with. You have to be able to laugh as well as love. Respect is a must. Yes "Love/Lust" may fade with time but a really good friendship will last forever. I am very lucky that my first marriage has spawned an incredible friendship. Luckily my ex respects and likes Ontario Diver so again I am a very lucky person that way.
Cobaltbabe-
Yep, time on my hands. Just sitting here at the computer in the midst of the "monster" (LA) waiting to catch my plane tomorrow to La Paz and the Sea of Cortez.
Of course a physical attraction is usually necessary for initial attraction (although I've dated women who I did not find highly attractive physically, but quite attractive in terms of personality and intellect). But I've seen too many relationships where that was the primary basis and did not suffice to develop a long-term relationship once the ecstasy of lust diminished.
No question that I am usually attracted to a woman on the basis of physical appeal. However, I am also attracted to women who I really enjoy based on those other attributes. Sometimes a woman who is not drop dead gorgeous is so nice and the conversation so rewarding that the attraction is based on that.
It reminds me of a female friend of mine who years ago "switched" from heterosexuality to being a lesbian. We talked about the transition. She said she had never even contemplated it, but that when she met her partner there was such a connection at what she referred to as the "soul" that it was inescapable.
As for me, I'm looking for a drop dead gorgeous Asian woman diver with a PhD and a great sense of humor (she'd need it to survive being with me!).
How soon is that flight to La Paz???
Dr. Bill
Yep, time on my hands. Just sitting here at the computer in the midst of the "monster" (LA) waiting to catch my plane tomorrow to La Paz and the Sea of Cortez.
Of course a physical attraction is usually necessary for initial attraction (although I've dated women who I did not find highly attractive physically, but quite attractive in terms of personality and intellect). But I've seen too many relationships where that was the primary basis and did not suffice to develop a long-term relationship once the ecstasy of lust diminished.
No question that I am usually attracted to a woman on the basis of physical appeal. However, I am also attracted to women who I really enjoy based on those other attributes. Sometimes a woman who is not drop dead gorgeous is so nice and the conversation so rewarding that the attraction is based on that.
It reminds me of a female friend of mine who years ago "switched" from heterosexuality to being a lesbian. We talked about the transition. She said she had never even contemplated it, but that when she met her partner there was such a connection at what she referred to as the "soul" that it was inescapable.
As for me, I'm looking for a drop dead gorgeous Asian woman diver with a PhD and a great sense of humor (she'd need it to survive being with me!).
How soon is that flight to La Paz???
Dr. Bill
cobaltbabe
Diva of the Deep
Does that mean I don't have a chance? ;-0
A little something I heard once, in regards to love and marrige:
One may love many times in their life, but they may only once be truely in love.
One may love many times in their life, but they may only once be truely in love.
Marie (cobaltbabe)- of course you don't have a chance, you're already taken! One thing I don't do is mess with existing relationships... they're hard enough to maintain as it is.
However, Marie, I'm ever the diplomat and am always willing to compromise as long as the other qualities are present.
Darn, still 28 hours until I board that plane!
Dr. Bill
However, Marie, I'm ever the diplomat and am always willing to compromise as long as the other qualities are present.
Darn, still 28 hours until I board that plane!
Dr. Bill
cobaltbabe
Diva of the Deep
I would never do that either. I was just playing with you. 
ut:
ut:
Why is it women always want to play with me? Sigh.
Dr. Bill
Dr. Bill
