I don't think any one here is suggesting to "rely" on anyone.
I don't know about anyone else, but my training for accelerated deco dives is to plan one of two ways. Either, plan so that I can complete all my deco on back gas (in which case, my deco cylinder just lets me get out faster), OR, plan so that I don't need more than half of the deco gas I'm carrying. The latter is the generally preferred method. When planned that way, the training is that if I lose my deco gas (e.g. deco cylinder valve O-ring blows out), my buddy has the deco gas I need. And vice versa.
On a deco dive planned that way, I believe I am totally relying on my buddy (in the event I lose my deco gas).
Are you suggesting that everyone else here plans a different way than I was trained? Do you all always plan such that you can complete all deco on your back gas (or other gases you are carrying for yourself), if necessary?
If you plan your deco the same way I was trained, then isn't everything you say about this subject built on a foundation of relying on a buddy?
Tom's plan seems eminently pragmatic. But, I do wonder how well that plan would survive a direct strike from the real world.
"We're not out yet, but my isolator is closed and my buddy has just drained his side of my tanks dry. I have 700 psi left in my tank."
Will you fight your buddy off until he drowns in order to get out? Even if you think you could possibly get out and have 250 psi left in your own tank (but you can't really be certain)? If you haven't made the decision, in advance, that you WILL fight off your buddy until he drowns, then why bother closing the isolator in the first place? Will you have a mental milestone? "If he makes it to here, I will open the isolator again. But, if he doesn't make it this far, then I'm keeping it closed and letting him drown." How precisely will you calculate that milestone? Will you condemn your buddy based on a some quick mental arithmetic and time/distance/gas estimates? Or will you do a serious attempt at the utmost accuracy in establishing your buddy's deathline?
I don't know what I would do and I'm not saying Tom or anyone else is right or wrong. I think I would rely on my training, which includes proper gas planning to prevent either of us from dying - and (so far) does not include closing my isolator - and trust (hope!) that we planned well enough that we are both able to get out - or neither of us is getting out.