Buddy got bent, sort of...

[halocline]

Don't pay any attention to the knuckleheads that are calling you a "bad buddy." They have no idea what your dive was like, are forgetting that this was your FIRST dive trip after certification, and don't seem to understand that a depth differential of 7 ft at that depth, in 100 ft visibility water, is practically holding hands. On EVERY dive I've made in caribbean waters, in a guided group, buddy pairs are routinely this far apart at some point during the trip.

Jeesh, some of you guys will jump at anything to criticize!

You're not responsible for his "injury" (if he was really suffering from DCS) there could be many different factors. If anyone involved should take some responsibility, the DM might have thought twice about bringing newbies on their second day of diving to 100ft. I've seen that happen several times in Cozumel, though, so it's not out of the ordinary. I don't think it's very smart, but it happens.

I have a friend who got certified for her honeymoon because her husband really wanted to dive. She had a horrible time on their first trip, went OOA with a lousy DM, etc.....and I thought she'd never dive again. Now they go on dive trips several times a year and she has a great time. I hope your story has a similar happy ending!

 

[victor]

Matt is correct,
First this is not your fault, you both agreed to do the dive. If he was uncomfortable then he should have thumbed the dive, but he did not.
I have done that dive a number of times and only a 7ft seperation is nothing.
Did he have DCS, well we will never know.
I think the only thing you could have done different was to call DAN before going to see the doctor.
Don't beat yourself up over this.

Yes I agree he should get re-certified if he is not comfortable with his skills and dive tables.

Has he checked all his insurance policies, many will cover you a chamber ride as long as he was only recreational diving.

What ever happen don't let this put you off.

 

[PePaw]

I would say that he suffered an anxiety attack ! He may never dive again or become a shallow reef diver, or take some further training and eventually be okay. I'm not going to give you relationship advice because I don't know what your feelings for him are, but at minimum, you should find another dive buddy so that you can further your expierience and enjoy doing everything your comfortable with doing.

This weekend my wife is doing her checkout dives for her certification. My "hope" is that she is comfortable and safe and that she will develop the same level of love and enjoyment of the sport as I do.

But...I have to realize the possibility exist that may not be the case. In any event I will remember your story and NEVER try and get her to do a dive she may be uncomfortable doing. And fullfill my obligation to be a good buddy and look after her in the water.

So thanks for sharing and good-luck to you.

 

[DandyDon]

I'm chuckling over the "get out now" relationship questions. That's a little rash, but it does sound like you need to plan on other diving ideas - as you have the want-to and he doesn't...

You were his buddy, He did not want to go that deep you should not have gone that deep. It also sounds like you left him. That makes you the bad buddy

That's pretty rash, too. I don't think any experienced divers would say that. Yes, buddy's should stay closer, but in the real world - newbies feel safer followig the dive guides.

Anyway, he got certified in the Caribe, and you did a deep dive in the Caribe - that's how those things very often work there. Rules are but suggestions. I did a Resort course dive to 100 ft in the Caribe.

 

[diver 85]

I'm chuckling over the "get out now" relationship questions. That's a little rash, but it does sound like you need to plan on other diving ideas - as you have the want-to and he doesn't...

That's pretty rash, too. I don't think any experienced divers would say that. Yes, buddy's should stay closer, but in the real world - newbies feel safer followig the dive guides.

Anyway, he got certified in the Caribe, and you did a deep dive in the Caribe - that's how those things very often work there. Rules are but suggestions. I did a Resort course dive to 100 ft in the Caribe.

I have come to realize there are some real lou-lou's on this board.....I'm just hoping, in my next 900 dives, to become as perfect as these lou-lou's think they are........Example, if you're diving the Caribbean & never been 30 or 40 feet from your buddy, you are a lying SOB, plain & simple......I guess people from the south(the ones I know of anyway) tend to call it like it is.....

 

[DandyDon]

I have come to realize there are some real lou-lou's on this board.....I'm just hoping, in my next 900 dives, to become as perfect as these lou-lou's think they are........Example, if you're diving the Caribbean & never been 30 or 40 feet from your buddy, you are a lying SOB, plain & simple......I guess people from the south(the ones I know of anyway) tend to call it like it is.....

Well, the post I responded to was from a newish diver, and he was quoting from him training, just a little harshly. 30 ft is a little much, but 7 feet? I don't think I want mine closer...

 

[grassyknoll]

Man, talk about treating a new diver like a Piñata! I don't see that the OP (based on her current level of training experience) really made much in the way of errors. Sure, she could have realized the lack of fundamental training in her buddy/BF and chose not to dive but that's about it. I can't or won't read enough into her account to say she was not a good buddy, 7 feet away is definitely within the "few fin-kick" rule.
As for the doomed relationship? My wife doesn't dive and yet she is still my wife (as of today at least). I think what would be more telling is his lack of ownership for the event, his assigning blame to the OP worries me much more than whether or not they dive together.

Lastly, if BF does not spend much time on boats, he very well was simply experiencing that latent rocking feel you get once back on land as you lose your sea legs. I know some people who feel this effect for the better part of a day once returning to land, even if they have only been on a boat a short time.

 

[Thalassamania]

DCS is unlikely, but not impossible. I’ve known a couple of divers who were always checking themselves into the hospital because they were “bent” and to this day no one believes that they ever were, but they were awfully “body-aware” as the Docs called it and were a continuous amalgam of aches and pains in their day-to-day life.

 

[Dan Gibson]

I'd be more inclined to believe that someone wasn't really paying attention during the course.

As bad as some instructors can be, I find it very hard to believe that they skipped the dive tables.

 

[Lehmann108]

Jeez, your b/f seems to be a bit on the hysterical side (hypochondriasis) and doesn't really want to dive so he found a reason not to dive that wouldn't be his fault. The odds of him being bent are about zilch.