Some thoughts about diving alone

[D_B]

I didn't interpret Lynne's original post as saying anything negative about solo diving per se, but rather whether it is better and more comforting for family & friends to think that someone was there, that they didn't reach for help and not find any, that they died quickly/painlessly, etc.

But ultimately, death is always a solo dive. I envy Skiles and can't think of a better situation to die than doing what I like best. I presume his family knew him and understand that as well, even if no dive buddy was around to give them the particulars.

Some of you may remember the incident with SB user littlejohn a year or so ago. I was his buddy on what turned out to be his final dive. But as sad as that is, I know for a fact he really enjoyed that dive, and if you're going to go out, might as well be doing what you love.

I work in a hospital where many people die slow deaths surrounded by plenty of loved ones and caregivers. That's one way to go, and perhaps offers easier closure for those friends and family. Yet if I have any choice whatsoever in the matter (knowing that I probably don't), I would gladly choose the way of Skiles or littlejohn, even knowing that it might be tougher for friends or family.

I would trust that, ultimately, they will understand, even if that understanding comes with poignancy.

I agree with you on all of this but I would like to add to it.

Life is about choices and I take responsibility for making the choices that will eventually bring me to my appointment with death. It may be my decision to make a certain dive, take a certain drive, maintain or fail to maintain healthy habits but the decisions of my life will ultimately lead to the inevitable exit. My loved ones and I give each other our blessings to be alive until we are dead not to be living dead!

We can't 'be there' to help our loved ones cope with our deaths except by open and honestly discussing the potential with them in advance. It is my belief we can help them find peace by gifting them with the memory of lives well lived, love expressed and our discussion about coping with our inevitable death.

FritzCat I would find personal comfort if my husband's dive buddy was able to tell me what you have just said about littlejohn on his last dive! I am selfish enough to hope that I do not outlive my son and my husband but if I do... I will not dishonour their memory by living in self blame, second guessing or questioning their right to the choices of their lives!

TSandM thanks once again for posting a thread that challenges us to examine a vital aspect of our responsibility to our loved ones!

Two posts that stand out for me, thank you

Thank you too, Lynne

 

[redacted]

I would expect any autopsy to reveal diddly-squat.

75% chance it'll return drowning. 25% chance it'll return drowning with lung barotrauma.

It'll reveal a certain amount of age-related wear-and-tear as well.

I did not realize until later posts that he was on a rebreather. Such an event with an experienced diver like that on conventional scuba suggests a medical problem which should be revealed in an autopsy. But the rebreather opens up other possibilities which may not be so clear.

 

[divad]

but I think he died well.

That's what I'm thinking........at least he didn't die at his post.

 

[Nemrod]

An amazing man, Wes Skiles, died diving this week, and he died alone. No matter what you think about the decision to be alone where and when he was . . . one thing is true about his death, which is that no one will ever know exactly how it happened. There may be some information to be gained from his gear, but there may not be. An autopsy may or may not reveal anything useful.

His family and his friends, and people who didn't know him but loved him anyway, may never know exactly how and why he died. They may always think that, if someone had just been with him, he might have survived whatever the issue was.

A couple of years back, Kawika Chetron died . . . alone. He was another extraordinarily talented photographer and writer. No one knows what happened to him, because his body was never recovered. Maybe a companion or buddy could have helped; maybe not.

But the one thing you can say when someone does have a buddy on a fatal dive, as we could say about Richard Mork's death -- If a buddy was there, and did all he could, then we know that what could have been done was done. Otherwise, the torment is the thought that something could have been done, and wasn't.

I don't want my family tortured with that.

Am acquaintance of mine that I had met racing bicycles was recently killed, he was riding alone, he was found crumpled and his bike smashed in the ditch like road kill, hit and run.

I had a mentor friend, pilot, died in an airplane crash, in a rice field, he was flying alone from Jackson Miss. to Monroe La.

I had a friend, I met at the Y in Scottsdale, he died solo hiking north of the Grand Canyon.

I do or have done all of those things solo, including scuba diving, I will die someday no doubt, I will take my chances. We all hurt and grieve for the loss of our friends but how much would their lives have been dimensioned if we had imposed our rules on them? Some people like to take things on their way and accept certain risks, if indeed there is any additional risk to solo diving which cannot be statistically proven that there is.

It is sad these fine people in your post have passed on, we don't know how or why they died in exact detail and thus we speculate in order to rationalize why them and how I/you/them could avoid the same fate, we say it was unnecessary and untimely. I don't know it is my right to make that decision for somebody other than myself, we also don't know that if we were to ask them from the great beyond, would they have done different, I will bet some would say no.

A few days ago I made a 160 foot dive to a particular wall I wanted to see, I did the dive solo, I would rather be solo as opposed to exposing a buddy to the risks. I saw and photographed what I wanted to see, if I had died would it have been worth it, sitting here now I would probably say no but next time somebody tells me about a secret place with huge this or amazing that but it is dangerous and so you cannot go there, well, I will decide then as I did this time and take my chances. My chances are pretty good I figure. My closest near death experience on that trip was nearly being run over stepping off the curb looking into the traffic in the wrong direction, it was close, really close.

N

 

[Nemrod]

Some pretty accomplished divers have died while using rebreathers as well as diving in caves and/or deep diving, why single out solo diving? This seems to be selective reasoning at best. Perhaps there's another agenda being served here?

Yes, and there is another agenda, if only subconscious. We can choose not to do dangerous things or live our lives to the fullest. Cave diving, rebreather diving, free climbing and many other sports/activities are extremely dangerous even if done with a partner. Maybe not do those things, maybe just dream of doing those things but leave it to others to experience the thrill or adventure, or maybe just accept the risks that exist when we get up off the sofa and go out into the real world.

N

 

[DaleC]

I don't want my family to focus on the manner of my death (which I do not get to choose) but rather on the manner of my life (which I do get to choose).

While I appreciate the sentiment expressed it's funny (odd) that Lynne brought up this subject as I know she is very interested in cave diving. I wonder if she died in a cave whether her family would feel better if she were with a buddy or not and would they also feel angry and have unanswered questions:

Why did she put herself in that dangerous situation?

What was so important about that cave that she was willing to trade her life for?

She had such potential, why did she waste her life in a dark empty cave?

Would Lynnes teammate find praise from her family for being with her at the end or anger that they helped facilitate her death?

I suspect her family knows that she loves cave diving and, while she might not choose to die in them, she chooses to spend a part of her life exploring them. If her family is well adjusted to the concept of death they will (after greiving) accept her death and understand that the process is not always easy, clean or convenient.

If they are not well adjusted to the concept of death they will be angry and confused, seek to blame or find fault, either with Lynnes buddies or with Lynne herself. They will see Lynnes lifes value only in terms of how it effects them. They will feel short changed and will not be able to see that Lynnes life had value to her and that, by doing the things she loved, her life was fulfilled.

That's the way it is with solo diving too.

 

[VooDooGasMan]

Diving the oceans and lakes of the world are more fascinating than anything I could ever think of. Wrecks are my absolute glory, finding them is a feeling of no other.

To become famous is nowhere close to what I'm about. Solo diving is my private thoughts when I go down to see if I have found the wreck I was looking for. Ok so my diving is in the sailish sea, Its local yet very large, sometimes two days away. Now when you travel you want to take less, so I can take what I need. Single tank diving is far by easiest way of deep bounce dives, when dealing with current, wind, boat traffic. Huge tidal exchanges are contenders for everyday diving! Waiting for perfect tides are time consuming through the year.

If you would have ya" Take and put a marker bouy out, then dive down at slack, its dark so to run into it is overwhelming, many tricks to explain to do this solo on single tank. Past 250' on air is as risky as one gets, but from the surface to two hundrend fifty feet is a huge sailish sea playground of wrecks. I have a couple dozen wrecks less than an hour by boat from my homestead. Only a dozen or so are known wrecks.

Every one dives for there own reasons, whether solo, deep, overhead enviorment, team or buddy, there will always be tragic times above and below the sea! Thats why we dive to go see stuff sunk on the sea floor. And sometimes you never get back to the surface, seem's worth it to me also. Yet My Diving has died, is worse than me Dieing Diving.

This great guy went to the surface and dive team buddy's, believe the signal he gave was out of film, or was he himself out of film and tried to make it to the surface, cause he knew he could. As many close calls I have had, I make it to the surface safely. I have had some pretty bad situations on the surface to get too, or on my boat solo diving that trump solo diving under the sea. Divings Dangerous so there you have it. Rebreather diving is dangerous, for the simple fact Divings Dangerous.

Team and Buddy Diving is fun and safe till there is incident. To live that is an experience when a loss of a diver is in your presence, as you look at them you have this very un-nervy feeling that could be me someday. The worst is to find them underwater and have the thoughts shooting through your head, specially at depth.



Divings Dangerous



Happy Diving

 

[Jimsworld]

IMHO I think you simply being stupid diving deeper than 25 feet solo.

I solo dive myself and been in a number of uncomfortable situations diving solo, where everything that could had gone wrong did, but at 20' it was an easy shrug off and barely note worthy. Had I been at 40+ I'm sure I would have likely hurt myself badly.

Follow the 20 feet rule and you'll survive to love another day.

Unless it's your J O B, solo diving at 40+ feet is simply an unnecessary risk (like driving 90 on the freeway-- yea, you can do it... but should you).

Find a nice spot for shallow solo diving and enjoy yourself. Diving does not have to be dangerous.

Dying is for dummies, unless you are a risk taker-- then each to his own I guess.

 

[Mike Boswell]

This isn't about solo diving at all. It is about a buddy team which did not stay together.

I think the OP framed the issue very well when she said:

" -- If a buddy was there, and did all he could, then we know that what could have been done was done. Otherwise, the torment is the thought that something could have been done, and wasn't. I don't want my family tortured with that."

 

[Nemrod]

IMHO I think you simply being stupid diving deeper than 25 feet solo.

I solo dive myself and been in a number of uncomfortable situations diving solo, where everything that could had gone wrong did, but at 20' it was an easy shrug off and barely note worthy. Had I been at 40+ I'm sure I would have likely hurt myself badly.

Follow the 20 feet rule and you'll survive to love another day.

Unless it's your J O B, solo diving at 40+ feet is simply an unnecessary risk (like driving 90 on the freeway-- yea, you can do it... but should you).

Find a nice spot for shallow solo diving and enjoy yourself. Diving does not have to be dangerous.

Dying is for dummies, unless you are a risk taker-- then each to his own I guess.

That is a good rule for you, not for me, maybe 10 times that number give or take. Sorry, to inform you further, solo diving below 20 feet is not stupid nor are the people who do it and your rule is an opinion, not a fact and you have no science or proof otherwise to support your opinion beyond your own limitations. And, while speaking of limitations, your limitations are not mine.

N