worst pun ever

[fishb0y]

Can we get a moderator in here please!!! My brain is offended.

 

[DA Aquamaster]

This is not a pun in the true sense of the word as it actually happened, but...

...A Crestliner owned by one of the other slip holders developed and engine fire a few weeks ago. It was a nasty one that kept re-igniting and Dave, the marina owner, and I ended up using 5 extingushers before we got it out. Later, the deputy Sheriff arrived to take a report and asked Dave what kind of boat it was. Dave, in keeping with his fun loving personality, replied "It's a Smoker Craft!".

 

[abitton]

An Indian chief had three wives, each of whom was pregnant.

The first gave birth to a boy. The chief was so elated he built her a teepee made of deer hide.

A few days later, the second gave birth, also to a boy. The chief was very happy. He built her a teepee made of antelope hide.

The third wife gave birth a few days later, but the chief kept the details a secret. He built this one a two story teepee, made out of a hippopotamus hide. The chief then challenged the tribe to guess what had occurred.

Many tried, unsuccessfully. Finally, one young brave declared that the third wife had given birth to twin boys.

"Correct," said the chief. "How did you figure it out?"

The warrior answered, "It's elementary. The value of the squaw of the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws of the other two hides."

Marc

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[mike_s]

What did the fish say when he was swimming along and hit his head on a concrete wall?



dam!

 

[dive_lover88]

nooooooooooo......................y must i be put through this,in school my lecturers' puns are so cold that the sahara desert can be frozen over and now when i tot i was safe,this comes up.

 

[Former FLL Now MSP Diver]

Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron."

The other says, "Are you sure?"

The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."


Rimshot.


Marc

 

[mike_s]

A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West.

He sidles up to the bar and announces: "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."

 

[mike_s]

Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron."

The other says, "Are you sure?"

The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."

A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender replies, "For you, no charge."

 

[Rick Inman]

Alligator goes into a bar and orders a drink. An old drunk bar hag sitting next to the gator says, "I don't tink you should let those stinky, ugly reptiles into dis fine es-HIC-tablishment. They smell bad!"

So the alligator turns and to the old drunk woman and eats her up. He then finishes his drink and says, "Bartender, I'll have another."

"Sorry," sneers the bartender. "We don't serve your kind here."

"You don't serve alligators?" asks the gator.

"Oh, we serve alligators. But we don't serve drug addicts."

"Drug addict???" says the gator incredulously. "What makes you think I'm a drug addict?"

"Well," says the bartender... (oh, oh... here it comes...). "That's a bar-bich-you-ate."

 

[ohmdiver]

What did the hat say to the coat rack...

You stay here, I'll go no a head...