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Does it concern anyone that this question is being asked? I don't think you should ever leave your buddy. You don't have to be in their back pocket but the definition of "Dive Buddy" should speak for itself. The only time I can even think of leaving your dive buddy is you need to seek additional help and all other options have been exhausted
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Like some others have said I am pretty fortunate that most of the time my dive buddy is my wife and we are pretty well in sync. We know each others habits and air consumption.
I have never had a really bad dive buddy up to this point. I've had some that dived as a pair like my wife and I and I have had a couple that considered us being paired up because we were in the "same ocean". I can work around either as long as that is fleshed out above water.
Does it concern anyone that this question is being asked? I don't think you should ever leave your buddy. You don't have to be in their back pocket but the definition of "Dive Buddy" should speak for itself. The only time I can even think of leaving your dive buddy is you need to seek additional help and all other options have been exhausted
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It does "speak for itself" and what I hear is that being a dive buddy is a two way street. This is something all divers need to consider. On one hand I have no intentions of leaving my dive buddy, but on the other.....you got one shot at doing something stupid and I aint your dive buddy no more.
I think the textbook answer is "close enough to recognize any issues and render immediate aid." My answer is, close enough for you both to get to your redundant air source quickly if you've just exhaled and your primary doesn't deliver a follow-up breath.
That said, on night dives, my wife is a hand-holder.
Only reason I'm asking is that after reading the "Most Frightening Moments" thread and "Bad Buddies" thread I was wondering exactly how far a person who is not an experienced diver should be willing to follow a buddy. What if you're going to go into decomp and they want to stay down longer? My instinct would be to say "Screw that, I'm ascending with or without them." Or if they're going past MOD, etc., etc. Basically if they're being reckless and not caring about your safety.
Apparently the mantra of the importance of having a dive buddy has been promoted by your instructor(s). That’s perfectly fine, but not necessarily essential. I have never been out with a recreational dive op that required every diver have a buddy. I have seen tons of non-solo divers alone on a boat simply stay with the DM. I’m not trying to dissuade you from finding a buddy on the boat, but you never know what you’re going to get in that box of chocolates! Make sure the captain and crew, especially the DM, are aware of your experience level and concerns when you arrive whether you dive with a buddy or not.
A good rule of thumb is that if you both extend your arms, your fingertips should touch. If you're any closer, it's hard to swim without running into each other's fins (newer divers often want to swim closer, which can be really annoying). If you're much farther, it can be easy to lose track of one another and more difficult to communicate or respond to an emergency.
Where you position yourself is important too. Stay on the same side of your buddy - don't switch back and forth unless necessary. Stay in a place where you're visible in their peripheral vision. Don't swim directly behind, or worse, directly above them.
Lights are very helpful for passive communication, and of course essential at night. Keep your light beam in your buddy's field of view. Keep it stable and avoid wild movements (that can be a challenge if you're used to swimming/stabilizing with your arms). A slow back and forth sweep can call out a cool thing to look at. A circle can signal OK (to which you need to reply). A chaotic back and forth movement signals emergency.
A lot of places offer the option to hire a "private DM/guide." Although I bring my own buddy these days, with so many insta-buddy horror stories, I think if I were to find myself having to travel without my buddy, I would hire a buddy before I would tolerate being randomly assigned a buddy. I think it's money well spent. A private DM/guide can also point out interesting marine life to you that you might otherwise have overlooked. Also, in some circumstances there may be an opportunity to get to know people before the diving starts, and it may be possible to choose a buddy who seems compatible. But I wouldn't count on that.
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