Virus Warning....Please read!

[raviepoo]

jepuskar once bubbled...
I wish my last girlfriend came with a virus warning...sheeessshhh!

That's what latex is for.

 

[jepuskar]

I prefer neoprene!!

 

[randyjoy]

Oh my Gawwd - I haven't thought about Girlfriend 1.0 or 2.0 in a long time!!! That is definately a blast from the past! Now, get all those Win 3.11 jokes ready!

Anybody remember CPM and the :0 and :1 drives?

 

[Fishkiller]

I had Norton AV and thought I was safe then ran a Free scan from http://housecall.antivirus.com/housecall/start_pcc.asp

when a friend sent me the link and found I had a couple of worms that Norton didn't find along with our favorite Klez...

 

[jepuskar]

You all are talking over my head......raviepoo took my comment in the correct text it was meant...perverted real life STD.....

I came into the computer scene around Win95/Win98 and even though I am self-proclaimed computer geek, I have never heard of any girlfriend program version 6.9 or whatever. Did the program come with a drill bit to drill a 'small' hole into the computer???

 

[Spectre]

jepuskar once bubbled...
I have never heard of any girlfriend program version 6.9 or whatever. Did the program come with a drill bit to drill a 'small' hole into the computer???

A true geek has the answers at his fingertips!

-----------------
I'm currently running the latest version of Girlfriend and I've been having some problems lately. I've been running the same version of DrinkingBuddies 1.0 forever as my primary application, and all the Girlfriend releases I've tried have always conflicted with it.

I hear that DrinkingBuddies runs fine as long as Girlfriend is run in background mode and the sound is turned off. Unfortunately, I can't find the switch to turn the sound off. Therefore, I have to run both of them separately.

Girlfriend also seems to have a problem coexisting with my Golf program, often trying to abort Golf with some sort of timing incompatibility. On a positive note, DrinkingBuddies and Golf seem to have no incompatibilities whatsoever.

I probably should have stayed with Girlfriend 1.0, but I thought I might see better performance from Girlfriend 2.0. After months of conflicts and other problems, I consulted a friend who has had experience with Girlfriend 2.0. He said I probably didn't have enough cache to run Girlfriend 2.0, and eventually it would require a Token Ring to run properly. He was right, as soon as I purged my cache and realized that no one in their right mind is installing new Token Rings, Girlfriend 2.0 uninstalled itself.

Shortly after that, I installed Girlfriend 3.0 beta. Unfortunately, there was a bug in the program and the first time I used it, it gave me a virus. I had to clean out my whole system and shut down for a while. I very cautiously upgraded to Girlfriend 4.0. This time I used a SCSI probe first and also installed a virus protection program.

It worked okay for a while until I discovered that Girlfriend 1.0 was still in my system. I tried running Girlfriend 1.0 again with Girlfriend 4.0 still installed, but Girlfriend 4.0 has a feature I didn't know about that automatically senses the presence of any other version of Girlfriend and communicates with it in some way. This results in the immediate removal of both versions.

The version I have now works pretty well, but there are still some problems. Like all versions of Girlfriend, it is written in some obscure language I can't understand, much less reprogram. Frankly I think there is too much attention paid to the look and feel rather than the desired functionality. Also, to get the best connections with your hardware, you usually have to use gold-plated contacts. And I've never liked how Girlfriend is object-oriented.

A year ago, a friend of mine upgraded his version of Girlfriend to Girlfriend Plus 1.0, which is a Terminate and Stay Resident version of Girlfriend. He discovered that Girlfriend Plus 1.0 expires within a year if you don't upgrade to Fianc_e 1.0. So he did, but soon after that, he had to upgrade to Wife 1.0, which he describes as a huge resource hog. It has taken up all his space--he can't load anything else. One of the primary reasons he decided to go with Wife 1.0 was because it supposedly came bundled with a feature called FreeSexPlus. Well, it turns out the resource requirements of Wife 1.0 sometimes prohibits access to FreeSexPlus--particularly the new Plug-Ins he wanted to try.

On top of that, Wife 1.0 must be running on a well warmed-up system before he can do anything. Although he did not ask for it, Wife 1.0 came with MotherInLaw which has an automatic pop-up feature he can't turn off.

I told him to try installing Mistress 1.0, but he said he heard if you try to run it without first uninstalling Wife 1.0, Wife 1.0 will delete MSMoney files before uninstalling itself. Then Mistress 1.0 won't install because of insufficient resources

 

[jepuskar]

Very well done....something tells me you were laughing out loud to yourself as you typed that. I'm impressed!!

 

[Fotoz4FX]

I have found that No amount of Anti-virus protection can do as much as simple precautionary measures (I have been without virus protection for more than 5 years now and my paranoia seems to be working perfectly).
A few precautions:
1. NEVER use IE (it is the #1 hack / spam door)
2. If you get anything from anyone you don't know that has any attachment with an unrecognizeable attachment or .exe extension... don't even open it.
3. Chain letters threatening ill will are the hacker's tool for obtaining mailing lists - don't fall for it.
4. Paranoia is a good thing... share it with no-one (after all, you're paranoid).
5. If you suspect something might be infected... forward it to a Yahoo account so they can scan it before you open it... Yahoo has one of the best anti-virus programs running.
6. Finally... don't open any mail that is forwarded to you by anyone... if they can't copy and paste the link... odds are it might have been mailed by the virus itself (virus' can't copy and paste).

Do I sound paranoid?.... what?... who said that?