two cow theories of corporations

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tingkka

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Corporation

An American Corporation: You have two cows, you sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead.

A French Corporation: You have two cows, you go on strike cuz you want three.

A Japanese Corporation: You have two cows, you redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.

German Corp: You reengineer them so they live 100 years, eat once a month, and milks themselves.

Italian Corp: You have two cows, you have no clue where they are, you break for lunch.

A Russian Corporation:You have two cows. You count them again and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of Vodka.

a Mexican Corporation: You have two cows, but the Americans haven't taught you what a cow is yet, so you take a nap.

A Swiss Corp: You have 5000 Cows, none of them are yours, you charge for storing them.

A Brazilian Corp:You have 2 cows, you enter into a partnership with an American Corp. Soon you have 1000 cows and the American Corp declares Bankruptcy.

An India Corp: You have two Cows. You worship them.
 
American politics

Democracy, American Style:You have 2 cows, the gov't taxes you to the point you have to sell both to support a man in a foreign country who has only one cow, which was a gift from your government

Capitalism, American Style:You have 2 cows. You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.
Bureaucracy, American Style:You have 2 cows, the gov't takes them both, shoots one, milks the other, pays you for the milk, then pours the milk down the drain.
 
The Two Cow Explanation of what makes a ... :
Socialist: You have 2 cows, the Gov't takes 1 and gives it to your neighbor.
Republican: You have 2 cows, your neighbor has none, so what?
Democrat: You have 2 cows, neighbor has none. You feel guilty for being successful. You vote to tax your cows, forcing you to sell 1 to raise moeny to pay the tax. You vote to use the tax to buy a cow and give it to your neighbor. You feel righteous.
A Communist: You have 2 cows. The Gov't siezes both and gives you milk.
A Fascist: You have 2 cows. The Gov't siezes both and sells you milk.
 

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