You are ...
The Cap'n
Profile: Some men are born great, some achieve greatness and some slit the throats of any man that stands between them and the mantle of power. You never met a man you couldn't eviscerate. Not that mindless violence is the only avenue open to you - but why take an avenue when you have complete freeway access? You are the definitive Man of Action. You are James Bond in a blousy shirt and drawstring-fly pants. Your swash was buckled long ago and you have never been so sure of anything in your life as in your ability to bend everyone to your will. You will call anyone out and cut off their head if they show any sign of taking you on or backing down. You cannot be saddled with tedious underlings, but if one of your lieutenants shows an overly developed sense of ambition he may find more suitable accommodations in Davy Jones' locker. That is, of course, IF you notice him. You tend to be self absorbed - a weakness that may keep you from seeing enemies where they are and imagining them where they are not.
You are ...
Pirate, 2nd Class
Profile: Do you remember the last time you took a chance? I do. It was when you decided to leave the security of your mother's womb and headed for the bright light. It's time to head for the next bright light, my friend. Creativity is not your strong suit. You are good at doing what you are told to do and that, in itself, is a gift. It's not a gift to you, mind you, but rather a gift to those who will be there to tell you what to do. You like long walks on the beach and cuddling, but would never admit that to your Guy friends who think you are okay but can't always remember your name. Tapioca pudding seems a bit extreme for a fellow such as yourself, what with all the bumps and stuff. It's a good thing you are on a pirate ship, otherwise, you would be walking because you are positively pedestrian. Have a nice day.
You are ...
Ol' Chummy
Profile. You look old for your age. Hygiene is just that thing that happens to other Pirates. You like what you like. Taking a cannonball to the head in your younger days hasn't helped. Not one to take risks, you enjoy quiet evenings on your bunk. You're a collector. You like things. Not, "nice" things- just things. Some people think of you as a blight on humanity - a carbuncle on the alabaster skin of man. You think of yourself as a swell guy with lots of friend - just the one, but lots of him. If you weren't a pirate, but rather lived in the 21st Century, you would be the kind of guy who has played a computer game for four days without thinking of showering and living solely on Mountain Dew and Cool Ranch Doritos. What you lack in physical attractiveness you more than make up for in interesting skin conditions. What's the upside of all of this? With the Captain's lifestyle, you are likely to be running the ship in a week or two. Ahead! Warp Factor ONE!
You are ...
Th' Cabin Boy
Profile: You, me lad, are an activist! You will not only change the world, you will make a dyed-in-the-wool Pirate dream of you in a sheep costume. You are the embodiment of the love that dare not hoist its sail! Ahoy thar! You could make a two-patch Pirate turn his head - but then he would lose sleep over it and what good would that do anyone? An innovator, you are WAY ahead of your time - and everyone else's. You are sensitive and artsy-fartsy. You say things like, "artsy-fartsy" but there is always a slight giggle in your voice when you say it - like Paul Lynde on Hollywood Squares delivering a staggering punch line. Speaking of "punching" the only "punching" you would do is punching up that outfit with some accessories - say, a little bandana and some glass beads. You're not the Pirate we want in a fight, but we want you there for the crying game that follows! You go, girl.
The Cap'n
Profile: Some men are born great, some achieve greatness and some slit the throats of any man that stands between them and the mantle of power. You never met a man you couldn't eviscerate. Not that mindless violence is the only avenue open to you - but why take an avenue when you have complete freeway access? You are the definitive Man of Action. You are James Bond in a blousy shirt and drawstring-fly pants. Your swash was buckled long ago and you have never been so sure of anything in your life as in your ability to bend everyone to your will. You will call anyone out and cut off their head if they show any sign of taking you on or backing down. You cannot be saddled with tedious underlings, but if one of your lieutenants shows an overly developed sense of ambition he may find more suitable accommodations in Davy Jones' locker. That is, of course, IF you notice him. You tend to be self absorbed - a weakness that may keep you from seeing enemies where they are and imagining them where they are not.
You are ...
Pirate, 2nd Class
Profile: Do you remember the last time you took a chance? I do. It was when you decided to leave the security of your mother's womb and headed for the bright light. It's time to head for the next bright light, my friend. Creativity is not your strong suit. You are good at doing what you are told to do and that, in itself, is a gift. It's not a gift to you, mind you, but rather a gift to those who will be there to tell you what to do. You like long walks on the beach and cuddling, but would never admit that to your Guy friends who think you are okay but can't always remember your name. Tapioca pudding seems a bit extreme for a fellow such as yourself, what with all the bumps and stuff. It's a good thing you are on a pirate ship, otherwise, you would be walking because you are positively pedestrian. Have a nice day.
You are ...
Ol' Chummy
Profile. You look old for your age. Hygiene is just that thing that happens to other Pirates. You like what you like. Taking a cannonball to the head in your younger days hasn't helped. Not one to take risks, you enjoy quiet evenings on your bunk. You're a collector. You like things. Not, "nice" things- just things. Some people think of you as a blight on humanity - a carbuncle on the alabaster skin of man. You think of yourself as a swell guy with lots of friend - just the one, but lots of him. If you weren't a pirate, but rather lived in the 21st Century, you would be the kind of guy who has played a computer game for four days without thinking of showering and living solely on Mountain Dew and Cool Ranch Doritos. What you lack in physical attractiveness you more than make up for in interesting skin conditions. What's the upside of all of this? With the Captain's lifestyle, you are likely to be running the ship in a week or two. Ahead! Warp Factor ONE!
You are ...
Th' Cabin Boy
Profile: You, me lad, are an activist! You will not only change the world, you will make a dyed-in-the-wool Pirate dream of you in a sheep costume. You are the embodiment of the love that dare not hoist its sail! Ahoy thar! You could make a two-patch Pirate turn his head - but then he would lose sleep over it and what good would that do anyone? An innovator, you are WAY ahead of your time - and everyone else's. You are sensitive and artsy-fartsy. You say things like, "artsy-fartsy" but there is always a slight giggle in your voice when you say it - like Paul Lynde on Hollywood Squares delivering a staggering punch line. Speaking of "punching" the only "punching" you would do is punching up that outfit with some accessories - say, a little bandana and some glass beads. You're not the Pirate we want in a fight, but we want you there for the crying game that follows! You go, girl.