I dive the Balance and the wife uses the Libra. The horseshow shape of the back inflate bladder can trap air. There is a rear dump value but I doubt you can find it with heavy gloves on in cold water.
Next, The BC must fit so that the upper exhaust value is at the highest point when dumping air. If you tilt your body so the lower left side of the bladder is slightly higher than the lower right side, air will exhaust freely without trapping. Remember, to start dumping air first before starting an ascent. Infact you should be slightly negative when ascending. At this point you should be swimming (finning) to ascend. Especially when doing a free ascent.
When you are diving with your wife, notice the expansion of her back inflate bladder at depth. If it appears to be always full, she is overweighted. Most people think that the weight is is help then sink on the initial descent. When wearing heavy wetsuits, this can lead to overweighting yourself. Try dropping four to six pounds. If she cannot descend, then do a surface dive (head first) and this should get you down to about ten feet. At this point the wetsuit should be completely flooded and slightly compressed, thus making a feet first descent easier with less weight.
I dive with 20 pounds using the balance with a dry suit. I am about 5' 8" and 190 pounds. I do use a steel tank, but if I were using an AL80, I would add only 4-6 more pounds.