This is similar to a phenomenon or characteristic I see in saturation divers, combat swimmers, and submariners to a lesser extent. I suppose there is no way to know if it is developed from experience, training, or is largely inbred. I describe it quite un-artfully as coming to terms with death. Whatever “it” is, the result is a sense of calm and resistance to panic that is observable even in minor stressful situations.
You too? Man, that's great... Makes me feel better to know that the "syndrome" isn't too uncommon.
Logically, (that's all that seems to be left), I'm also aware of the fact that I don't really have much emotional response to what is otherwise a dangerous situation. The absence of fear, panic, and a "flight or fight" means that I have to compensate a little to ensure that I don't handle situations too casually. I can see that "normal" people might consider the lack of these emotions a blessing, but there's definite tradeoffs.
I would have no emotion, for example, if I was going 150 mph in a car on a crowded street. Logic - a slower thought process than fear or panic - would kick in, and I'd think, "Jeez, I might hurt someone if I don't slow down," so I would. But there would be no self-preservation emotion like panic or fear.
I remember getting caught in a sudden thunderstorm at the top of a 1200 ft. tower... This was before cancer. Since a climb is a 3-hour process for the fittest individual and an hour to an hour and a half descent, I spent hours descending and climbing again in order to get out of the danger. I remember distinctly being too focused to panic, and it took a lot of effort to make it happen without a catastrophe. Panic was always there during the event - fear, designed in to our psyches for the purpose of self-preservation. My focus and intent kept it from becoming a problem.
Of interest, and in accordance with Murphy's Law, the moment I touched down, the storm left as quickly as it had come.
Today, post-cancer, I think I'd have just strapped myself in and plugged my ears and enjoyed the light show. Either the tower was gonna get struck or not, and it wasn't going to help if I was mid-climb or not if the tower got struck. This seems more rational to me today - and possibly safer, since when climbing, there's times when I'm not clipped in - than descending and getting out of there. My decision to descend at the time was certainly based on fear and panic, with only the focus of the activity keeping it managable.
I believe it would be difficult to be in these professions without whatever “it” is. We share very different attitudes about risks, procedures, and expectations. This mind-set is often reflected in my posts, and frequently generates criticism. Not a complaint, just an observation.
Me too. I suppose it comes across as "mean" to other people. I suppose that, at best, it's unemotional and therefore unempathetic. I don't mean to be that way to people... But if someone reads my posts, they're gonna find that they're truthful and logical - even if that hurts feelings. "The Truth" is my way of caring. If I was being mean, then I'd lie or dance around the truth and cause someone to make inappropriate or incorrect decisions.
There are a lot of dangerous pastimes and professions that I suspect share this characteristic. There are also many people who would never participate in them, but successfully deal with life and death decisions under crisis every day — medical and public safety professionals for example. Some people say that is different because it is not “their” life at stake — but tell that to a cop, fireman, or military medic. Fascinating subject to reflect on.
Yeah it is! Good stuff. I bet you're a great dive buddy... Reliable and truthful and logical.