My friend, we have had some similar experiences. My OW checkouts were spread over two days. The first day was a disaster. 7mil +30lbs= I couldn't breath. I had done my first part of the checkouts ok and then it came time to go down again. I just couldn't do it. I bailed and said I'd finish it the next day. One ex marine DI said,"well, what's going to change by tomorrow." Although at the time that sounded cold, it made me think about why I couldn't breath. turned out that in class I was fitted with a Medium BC, the velcro belly band didn't sit at my waist, it came across my lower ribcage. Then you add the 7mil+30lbs= no wonder I couldn't breath. The second DI brought a LG intergrated BC on the second day, and I was a different person. I finished all of the checkouts and recieved my OW on my 35 birthday.
through out my OW classes I had multiple things going against me. 1. I'm allergic to the glue used on neopreme suits = full body rash, I now have a polartec suit. 2. Drank the pool two times, from this I learned to recover my reg and cough through it and not bolt to the top. Don't really recommend the activity of trying to drink the pool as something that you practice. 3. first time to the bottom of the deep end of the pool, I was in full scuba gear, now I'm the one that counts down the days till vacation.
I still have issues during the first couple of dives on the vacation. I've learned to be very honest with the Dive shops. Do some relaxation techniques, go through the process in your mind, take your time. I've also purchased my own equipment so that I'm using the same things everytime I'm in the water, I'm very fimiliar with my stuff. Visualize the beautiful surroundings.
Trace your steps back to the reason that you wanted to do this, go slower in your learning process, feel comfortable with each step. I now have about 50 dives in warm open water, I've taken my AOW, to be able to understand more and also help myself feel comfortable in the water. I go to every new dive with the expectation of learning something new, weather it be about me and my equipment, my communication and my buddy, or those neat critters that are down there. Let me know how your trip to Belize goes. If you know that taking your time will help you, then watch out for the excitement bug that may take over when you get down there and don't jump into a three day course. I almost did it, glad I didn't, I think that it would have scared me to death. I needed the slow pace and repetativeness that the OW classes allowed me. Good luck.
Shaken_Bake:
All I can say is, "Wow!" Thank you, thank you everyone who's taken time to reply. You have all been so supportive and encouraging to a stranger. I can't tell you how relieved I feel, to the point where I'm thinking maybe I can try this again. You've all made some excellent suggestions and now I know I'm not completely hopeless.
I spent a lot of time tonight talking about my experience with my husband and another friend who's a diver. Everyone seems to agree that I should have had more time to get used to it, the cold, the new depth, the heavier equipment, before performing any of the skills. I wish I could pinpoint exactly what made me bolt, but I'm pretty sure that if the water were warmer and I didn't feel so constricted, the outcome may have been different. I don't know. As I sat in my car crying my eyes out right after I got out of the water, I was absolutely certain I never wanted to strap on a tank again. Now that I see what might have been different, I'm starting to think I might give it another go - someday. I have a feeling that when I'm snorkeling in Belize next month, watching my husband dive below me, I might regain the motivation that I had to begin with.
Thanks again!