Inability to PEE !

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I believe the techincal name for this is "perfomance anxiety". It can happen to any of us. In the water, it is often necessary to stop what you are doing to initiate flow and stay relatively still till you are done. I speak with some "experience". Fighting a current or holding onto a surface line in a current sometimes makes it more difficult--especially if everyone on board knows what you are doing.

Couple this with submersion diuresis and you bet you are uncomfortable!

Just find a nice sandy place on the bottom, plant your hands in the sand facing the current, tap your ruby fins together three times and think "there's no place like home!" Voila, you pee.
Don't move till you're done unless your buddies are no where to be seen!

Good luck!

Larry Stein
 
yep... theres nothing quite like peeing at depth!! i can understand not wanting to pee in an expensive wet suit... mine cost me $700 and it took me a while before i would go in it... but i cant say that ive ever actually had any problems going when i needed too... it must be rather frustrating
 
Bubble!
You have me beat: mine was only $550 (custom). At these prices, we are peeing in designer formalwear! (which may explain why they don't have a category for divers at the Oscars! - "And the award for Best Underwater film star goes to the _________ in the very wet and smelly Vera Wang."
 
Woolite is really great for removing most odors. Skins and suits get funky after a while--especially if you don't air them out when stored.

A capful on gentle cycle works fine. A skin can be dried on a delicate cycle or cold tumble and hung up to finish. A suit has to be hung after the washing machine. Actually, the neoprene is so buyonant that you might just want to hand wash and hang after rinsing.

Works for me.

Larry Stein
 
Why is everyone so obsessed with urinating in King Neptunes Kingdom? How would you like it if a large humpback whale came into your living room for a quick squirt?:eek:

Maybe that's the answer to the unexplained reason why whales beach themselves. I can hear it now.

Chief whale: "Hey that female diver in the expensive looking wetsuit just relieved herself in the parlour".

Other whales in unison: "Yuk, why do they do that?"

Chief whale: "OK guys, get into a school it's time for a beach party, lets hose down their favourite holiday spot!"

Pilot whale: "OK chaps, follow me Tally-ho!"

Sperm whale: "I have a better idea!

Humpback whale: "Keep it to yourself chum!"

Sperm whale: "Oh lighten up Quasi-modo!, I was just thinking of asking 'Free Willie' to swim up river and then do a fly-by of their reservoir to contaminate their drinking water".

Chief whale: "Yeah, see how they like it!"

Just then a couple of Orcas leap out of the water to 'Hi-five', "Al-right!"

Chief whale: "OK, lets do it, we need to be well dressed for this but please - NO WEDDING DRESSES!"
:jester:

Instructors! Please hear me out, maybe somewhere in S101 SCUBA for beginners, perhaps between 'Bouyancy control' and 'Rescue crowd control', we should be teaching the finer points of BLADDER CONTROL?

Please don't tell me it's an 'age thing' or a 'female thing' my wife and I have never ever pee-peed in our suits and I have been diving in open water since 1969. (I suppose being in dry-suits is an added incentive?).

I can't help wondering how you would feel, if next time you wanted to dive, a large fish appeared and stuffed you down the loo! :peek:

Aquamore
"Go before, after, but never during.":jester:
 
art.chick... oops perhaps i should have said that was NZD which makes it around 350 - 400 USD.

I actually clean my westuit after every time i use it cos the people that I got it from said that the salt would hasten decay of the suit.
 
Right u r, Bobble! No matter what gets on or in your suit, a good cleaning erases a multitude of sins.

As for Aquamore's hilarious interpretation, I regret to say that it is our OW instructor who advised us to pollute King Neptunes' neighborhood! However, as this is Los Angeles, I suspect that he is getting paid by real-estate developers to bring down the value of underwater property so unscrupulous contractors can snarf it up at a cut rate & build a shopping reef for yuppie garibaldi fish. (thus displacing the kindly globe crabs who are on a fixed income of 3 clams a week.):D
 
Originally posted by Aquamore
Why is everyone so obsessed with urinating in King Neptunes Kingdom? How would you like it if a large humpback whale came into your living room for a quick squirt?

"Go before, after, but never during.":jester:
Shoot Aquamore... you came over to my house for a visit I wouldn't expect you to practice bladder control... I would expect you to use the loo ... not hold it until you got outside and then pee on the sidewalk...

What you're failing to understand here is that the whales' livingroom is also the whales' loo....
Perfectly fine for guests to use the host's loo...

(yes we dive in their loo!)
 
Enough about pee; another bodily expulsion that can go into the ocean is VOMIT (I see it on every durn dive boat). It is really an art to upchuck into your reg. Most people will get sick up on the top of the waves due to the motion, but some, like my husband do a grand job of holding the reg mouthpiece in place while spewing out fish food at 60'. (DO NOT TAKE THE REG OUT, but you know that from OW basic, right? Any takers for an arguement over which agency teaches better vomit techniques?) So he attracted a school of yellowtail jacks & motioned to return to shore. He needed to swim underwater to avoid further sickness up top. The fish followed him hoping for dessert. One eager jack looked downright disappointed as his chef climbed out of the water.
 
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