hnladue once bubbled...
Just a note that the Toyota Highlander is on the list of the 10 safest SUV's. It's the same SUV as the Lexus RX300. Just the body(look) is different. I have a 2001 Highlander and have had an accident. Totaled the front bumber and the divers side fender. Only $1200 to fix it. They had to replace the headlights and fogs too.
The Highlander and the RX300 are the new breed of car-utes that are simply raised station wagons with all-wheel drive.
Safe is not immune to falling apart, and I don't think the original comment referred to accident damage. I think it referred to a lack of reliability when subjected to what many might call abuse (driving over bushes, scraping the bottom heaviliy at 20 mph, getting airborne rather than going annoyingly slow on a long, rarely used road, etc)
The bottom line for me is that I would get a minivan or a wagon rather than any of the car-utes. They combine the worst aspects of traditional sport utes (step in height, poor mileage, reduced ride comfort with the same handling) with the worst aspects of wagons (not as tall inside as a minivan (though a bit taller than a wagon), not durable in moderate off road situations unless you take special care, reduced payload) when compared to either. Wagons could easily tow more, but companies decided to limit liability by refusing to rate wagons for towing even when they are quite functional with moderate loads. (Auto trannies may not be up to it, though.) My '89 Prelude (stick) was used to tow a jet ski frequently for 3 years, and still runs fine with 130k miles on it.
For many people who want an SUV, the Highlander, Pilot, RX300, etc will not suffice. Their suspensions are simply not up to rough treatment often encountered when driving over uncertain terrain. They are for going VERY SLOWLY over moderate terrain or for travel over deep snow ON ROADS. The bottom line, their raised height and larger tires can get you there, but if you want to keep your suspension pieces straight, you need to be very gentle with them. Load them down, and
extra extra care is required.