@JTinSD: OK. I have to ask. You mentioned that people knew you were going to do this dive.
Were these people dive-certified?
If so, what did they think of you signing up for this dive trip?
If they are divers, how much experience do they have?
Did they know that Dive #2 was going to be at Scripps Canyon (another deep dive)?
I ask all of these questions because I'm imagining how I would react if one of my friends, with your level of dive experience (approx. 60 lifetime dives over 1 yr. and one dive in the 100 fsw range), talked about diving the P-38...and then signed up to go dive it.
There is no one responsible for "allowing" me to sign up for this dive other than me. My training places responsibility for my dive planning on me. I signed up for it, I didnt ask anyones advice. I don't have a big network of dive buddies like someone who has been diving for a long time, anyway. I wish I did.
My one regular buddy knew, my wife, and I guess a non diving friend or two. When I asked a past instructor and present mentor about borrowing a bail out bottle and regulator, although he didnt make a big deal of it, he asked a few questions that raised my concerns. After I canceled, I went to see him, and we are making arrangements to do the deep diver course and plan this dive together at a future date.
I know I need more regular dive buddies, people I can bounce dive plans off of, even when we are not diving together. I really only have one, with similar experience to mine, a few others I have dived with occasionally, and the mentor I mentioned. I have fallen into the habit of showing up at the boat single and picking up a buddy for the day, or tagging along with a buddy pair. According to my log, nearly half my dives were not with someone I knew before that day. For me, it beats not diving at all. I am just realizing, I sign up for dives first, then call around to see if someone wants to go with, not the other way around.
My OP was really hard to write, but I really appreciate the responses. Believe me, I would have preferred to write a dive report about the great time I had, diving on this vintage plane at the limits of rec diving. Thanks to everyone here for making me feel like I made the right decision. You are right, the wreck will still be there when I am truly prepared to dive it.