How to piss me off? If i'm on my own recreational diving and you know i'm a DM, don't assume that I will work for you pro bono and use me to babysit your clients. That's what you have a DM for, or at least pay me. Long ago, I stopped using my DM card when signing up for dives because of more than once being paired up with a brand new diver because the shop didn't have enough employees to watch everyone. My favorite was being on one boat where the captain decided in the boat briefing to point out all of the DM's on board (even though I did not work for them and was there as a client) and stated that we were there to help out the passengers in any way they needed. Then I spent the rest of the charter getting the stink eye from the captain when I told some other divers that no, even though I was a divemaster, I would not change out their tanks and equipment for them. I told them that I would happily assist them, if they needed help, but it was not my job to be their boat butler (and yes, I was polite about it and not rude). At the end of the charter, the captain pulled me aside to complain that I was not helpful to his customers enough, and I told him that I would not be on his boat anymore and to pound sand.