How to become a better diver without a skilled dive buddy?

[Mish2020]

Hello, I'm Mish2020 in Canada. I appreciate reading all the advice and tips on becoming a better diver. Thanks in advance to any and all who respond to my upcoming questions. First One:

I have been reading on this site about the fact that all new divers need to become fully responsible for their own safety. One of the key factors I see repeated often is having a good dive buddy and not depending on diving with someone you don't know, or expecting the DM to be your buddy all the time. However, my husband does not dive and unfortunately so far, none of my friends who can travel with me are able/wish to learn to dive. I can only go diving twice a year when I go on a "dive vacation", and this is often not during the times when the dive clubs located close to me have their trips (I am a teacher and limited usually to summer diving or March Break if there are any affordable airfares). Therefore as a newer diver I find myself diving with a DM as a buddy, paying for a DM to dive with me, or having to partner with someone I don't know. Once last summer my newly assigned buddy was so interested in taking pictures he immediately swam away from me and I lost sight of him until the end of the dive. I understand he probably did not wish to be paired with a new diver.

I am not sure what to do as I move forward in diving. I am not an experienced enough diver to feel confident with a stranger buddy. I guess I can keep paying to have a DM with me until I get more training, which I plan on doing. Any suggestions would be appreciated.
Thanks.

 

[supergaijin]

I reckon you should try to find a club.... and be prepared for cooler water.

Diving vacations twice a year is actually quite a bit compared to some. 'Refresher' courses can be useful before your vacation so you can hit the water running so to speak.

 

[boulderjohn]

Welcome to ScubaBoard!

You posted two identical threads in two different forums, which you probably did not realize that we don't do here. I merged the two here rather than in the Introductions section, since you are more likely to get the advice you are seeking here.

When I started diving, I was a teacher with a non-diving wife, so your problem is well understood. I did a lot of my vacation diving in Cozumel, which is a popular destination for Canadians like you. One advantage of that location for people like you is that the dives there are required by law to be DM-led, meaning that you do not have to pay extra to be with a DM, and everyone has to stay in a group, so your buddy will not be straying too far from you.

In those early days, whether in Cozumel or other places where there was no DM in the water, I was a little intimidated because I was a beginner. I didn't feel I knew the ropes enough, and I let my supposedly more experienced insta-buddy take the lead. As I gained more experience, I finally started being more assertive. For example, once I realized that the pre-dive checks so routinely ignored really are important, I just started doing them with my insta-buddy.If I took the lead--no problem. If I waited for the buddy to do it--no check.During the pre-dive check, I would talk about the dive plan, including buddy procedures. That usually had a good effect on the dive that followed.

 

[Peter69_56]

Its sure is hard if you don't have a regular dive buddy who is competent. Don't ever think that all experienced divers don't want to dive with you. While many may not chose to there are some like myself that are quite willing to help new divers. Provided I know the diver is new and is looking for some guidance, I am more than willing to help. On the other hand if the new diver is full of arrogance and full of (as we say in OZ) bull &^%$ then I move on and find another buddy. Whilst I have the right to be able to dive and enjoy my dives, I also have a moral obligation to help others in need.

I would try and join a club and find someone helpful if you can, but if not then pick someone in the dive group you are diving with who appears to show competence and a willingness to help. I refuse to dive with people who are clearly a risk to themselves and me, that is to say stupid divers (experienced or not). But remember being inexperienced and requiring help does not make you a stupid diver. Arrogance, being obnoxious and trying to show you are better than you really are some of the indicators of a (as I would put it) stupid diver.

If you know there are some things you require help with, then ask and hopefully a conscientious diver will help you.

Also read up as much as you can on all the things you have concerns about. That's what I do if I become stuck on something.

 

[spectrum]

Mish2020

The real answer has been mentioned and that is to become an active local diver. Water temperature just does not fly as a reason. I know many parts of your country abound with fresh or ocean opportunities.

You have probably already read that the 3 best ways to become a better diver is to dive, dive and to dive. From reading your post you have also figured out that vacation diving with a potpourri of buddy's is not going to get you there anytime soon, if ever.

If this can't work for you then stabilizing the buddy situation is the next best thing. Getting involved with local clubs or meeting other divers, perhps teachers with similar constraints may help.

I am in Maine, unless you are up near the glacier we are not worlds apart. I can tell you that right now I can dive fresh water in trunks should I choose to, at least in the first 18 feet or so. Local diving does not have to mean clawing your way out of a hole in the ice. You can enjoy a nice 3-4 month season, mainly over summer beak and have a blast in a good wetsuit.

Pete

 

[pjhansman]

Where in Canada are you located? Might be some people here on Scubaboard who are close to home....

 

[jeangadbois]

I'm in the Ottawa area. I'm pretty new to diving myself but I get out at least weekly. Let me know if you want to come out.

 

[mat4ov]

Depending on where you're at, I'm always looking for another dive buddy. I'm in the metro Detroit area, so technically not Canada, but very near the border with Windsor.

 

[DivemasterDennis]

You become a better diver by diving and practicing your skills, as well as by taking continued classes to expand those skills. The first three year I dove, Iit was with randomly assigned buddies, and while not always ideal, I dove, enjoyed it, and grew as a diver. Then I landed a "dive trasvel buddy," and two year later my wife got certified. That was great. But sometimes Debbie doesn't dive when I want to- she may have had enough diving that day. So I still pair up, and be sure to have a good conversation with my "new buddy" about dive plan, objectives, activities and expectations.
DivemasterDennis

 

[diversteve]

www.singledivers.com might be an option.

For the last eight years we have been the premiere online community for single and married but buddyless or the "spouse does not dive" divers.

I'd also consider a liveaboard. On our last one - Turks/Caicos Explorer - there was a single woman from Canada. We all met her when the van picked her up so she didn't know anyone prior to arriving. One of the groups was a dentist, his wife, and their teenage son so she buddied up with them for the week. She was a new diver, we loaned her gear like lights, marker lights, etc. so she could night dive - the ship had them but ours were better. That was her first night dive ever also. The ship paired her up with another woman that was part of a group of nine - also a single traveler - to share a cabin since the rest of that group was doctors and their wives/gf's.

The other advantage is that on a liveaboard a DM is provided on every dive at no extra cost (Of course you partially pay for it upfront) Depending on crew rotation, our boat often had two DM's in the water - one leading/following or on several occasions the 2nd DM took a group of 3-4 divers somewhere else instead.

It's also a quick and easy way to knock out 25+ dives. Not the cheapest but when you add up the cost of rooms/meals/boat trips on a shore based trip, it's pretty reasonable. Also they range in price from $1000-4000+ so it's possible to find something within your budget.