How many online forum group members does it take to change a lightbulb?

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I've calculated that it should provide enough light for me to make it to the loo, but probably only for a #1.

Are my calculations sound or am I going to die?

Result: sound
Reason: who gives a '#2'
 
Are my calculations sound or am I going to die?
Your calculations look sound, and you are going to die.

Whether or not the torch will have anything to do with your death is impossible to say, though.
 
After screwing in the lightbulb do I turn it back a quarter turn? What watt?
 
An oldie, but a goldie:

How many online forum group members does it take to change a lightbulb?

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed.
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs.
27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs.
53 to flame the spell checkers.
41 to correct spelling/grammar flames.
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb"
another 6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive.
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim *they* were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct.
156 to email the participant's ISPs complaining that they are in violation of their "acceptable use policy"
109 to post that this group is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb group.
203 to demand that cross posting to hardware forum, off-topic forum, and lightbulb group about changing light bulbs be stopped.
111 to defend the posting to this group saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts *are* relevant to this group.
306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique, and what brands are faulty.
27 to post URLs where one can see examples of different light bulbs.
14 to post that the URLs were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URLs.
3 to post about links they found from the URLs that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group.
33 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy.
19 to quote the "Me too"s to say "Me three"
4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ.
44 to ask "what is a FAQ"
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
143 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again...

And on SB, also:
47 to say "you're going to die if you change a lightbulb that way."
163 to say "get a BP/W."
176 to complain about the poor standard of lightbulb training these days.

You forgot 1 to give us a 20,000 word history of the lightbulb
 
My dad used to screw in lightbulbs and I found some of his “vintage” bulbs from the 70’s. Is it safe to screw these in or should I have them serviced at my LDS?
 
If your LDS tells you they are too old and obsolete then walk out. They are just trying to sell you a new lightbulb.

No need. I discovered the bulbs were not DIR compliant, so I immediately threw them in the trash.
 
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The manufacturer no longer offers the master technician course they only offer individual classes for each of their new products. Newer dive shop technicians will have no way of getting certified to service older bulbs. You will be forced to upgrade to a newer bulb for safe service in the future.

Assuming your bulb follows the Aqualung business model.
 
https://www.shearwater.com/products/swift/

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