How do I help someone quit smoking?

[sunshinefishy]

Calling all Scuba Friends for advice:

I would like to help a friend of mine kick his smoking habit. He's been trying for the past 2 weeks (at least) but keeps relapsing. I think he's been smoking for 6-7 years about 2-3 packs a day.

I've always believed that if you truly want to quit then you have to stop smoking for yourself and not for anyone else. So I've always been quite passive when it came to helping my friends because I don't like to nag.

But I'd like to take a more active approach now. What I'd like to know is, how can I and his other friends provide support for him? Is there anything that we can do?

Sandy

 

[MNScuba]

First, you absolutely have to WANT to quit or it won't work...period.

If they REALLY WANT to quit, then here's what worked for me (at least until my divorce) haha.

The main thing is to prepare yourself. I set a date two months in advance (I used my Birthday as a date to quit). This way, you're mentally thinking about it for two months or so and you begin to be aware of smoking, how it effects you and why you are quitting. If you smoke in your vehicle, start by not doing that anymore during the two month period before your quit date. If they must have one, then pull over (in a safe location) and have one. This is a big step...

Next, after the quit date do NOT drink beer (if they drink it). Keep in mind that drinking, eating, thinking and driving are the most difficult times when you quit smoking. Have them think about all of this during the 2 month progression. They more than likely will gain weight because snack food often replaced the cigarette, this is normal and you can expect about a 20 gain.

That's really about it... just make sure they mentally prepare themselves during that two months, it really helps. Oh, and be supportive...Go to non-smoking events, etc to help reduce the urge.

Chris

 

[socaldiver]

Sandy,

I have/had been smoking for 40 years and 3 weeks ago, after coming back from my last dive I said enough is enough.

I went down and bought the dreaded "patches" (step 1 this time) and faithfully wore one everyday for the first week. Now I put one on half way thru the day and sometimes not at all. I also will suck on a mint when I really get the urge.

It takes a lot of willpower from the person who WANTS to quit, for whatever their reason(s). I cannot emphasize the smoker really needs to want to quit. Support from friends is nice but you need to watch your step, some might think you are nagging.

 

[Rick Murchison]

SunshineFish once bubbled...
how can I and his other friends provide support for him? Is there anything that we can do?
Sandy

Well, yes, there is...
First, both you and he need to understand the nature of his addiction. Addiction. Tobacco use is beyond desire, pleasure, need. A true addiction, the brain makes it a moral and nutritional issue in addition to a simple desire. And it's very convincing. Your friend will experience thoughts like "I should have a cigarette. If I don't have a cigarette I am bad." Note the difference in this thought process and the thought process of yearning for a chocolate milkshake.
Once you understand its nature, then you can understand that the addict's very own brain will lie to him, and lie convincingly. It's a rare fellow who can overcome these lies without help. Some seek help from friends, some from professionals, some from groups like AA. Indeed, reading a "twelve step" book like AA's will give you a good roadmap to recovery. Some would trivialize the "quit smoking" effort. But like the alcoholic who really can just quit drinking, the smoker who can just quit smoking is a rare bird indeed.
Rick (last cigarette 31 October, 1987)

 

[TwoBitTxn]

From another reformed smoker I don't have any better advice than whats been given. What I can say is best wishes to all involved. Its a long road but well worth it.

TwoBit

 

[Big O]

I feel as though I must answer this question in a private message to you. Il be PM ing ou soon!

Dave

 

[DiveTub]

Easy you need to link smoking to something that hurts.
So everytime he tries to light up punch him in the head. After a dozen or so hits, he will associate smoking to pain and stop smoking..

Chris

 

[sunshinefishy]

Thank you Chris, Socal, Rick, TwoBit, Sydney_Diver and Big O for your thoughts.

SoCal: it definitely takes a lot of will power. I'm proud of you for taking the first step - good luck to you as well!

Sydney_Diver: You got me laughing. I'll go and find my boxing gloves now.

Big O: I will try your advice but he won't let me near a smoke so that may be a hard one to pull off. maybe I will just do the pyro part.

Thanks again guys.

Keep the advice coming.

Sandy

 

[MuddyFox]

...and squirt them everytime they light up. It's how I got my cat to quit smoking.

 

[Wendy]

How good of friends are you with him? Are you just friends or are you 'friends" ? I think a reward system is always good. Depending how close you two are will determine the reward he gets for staying smoke free. The longer he is smoke free the greater the reward.