Okay so today I went back to the lake to retry my second open water dive (and it was snowing!). My instructors gave me a neck bio-seal to try and solve the leakage problem and also hooked me up with a different set of regs. Although the seal didn't stop the leaks altogether I found when I took off my drysuit it was only my limbs which were soaked through rather than my torso so this helped significantly reduce the problem if not altogether get rid of it. However, when I first descended into the water and knelt on a platform my regulator instantly went into free flow AGAIN so I grabbed my alternate and cleared it by exhaling sharply so was fine if not a little shaken. My instructor sorted the free flow and we carried on with the dive. I did a couple of skills on a platform and immediately afterwards my reg went back into free flow. Again I dealt with it okay but it still spooked me so we ascended and I got out the water to warm up for a bit. My instructor said he could hear that I was breathing heavily and that this was the cause of the problem and not the regulator so I have decided to complete my open water dives in Mexico and build up experience in warmer waters for the three months I am there, hopefully improving my breathing technique, until I contemplate such a cold dive again. Ultimately I feel if I force myself to finish the open water dives in an environment in which I am so uncomfortable it may put me off diving for good which is the last thing I want to happen. Going to build up to it steadily
Thank you again for all the replies, made me feel like I'm just making a sensible decision rather than 'chickening out'.