First dive with a different buddy - not fun. :(

[AbyssalPlains]

It sounds like you were paired with a real @$$hole. Don't overanalyze it, from what you say you tried to do everything you could and are trained for to complete a challenging dive. Of course, there is always the possibility of misunderstanding hand signals between people who haven't dived together or were trained slightly differently. The difference that speaks out through your post appears to me that your buddy was a jerk about it. For example, you did the exact right thing by turning around frequently, and by critizing you for that this guy showed that in fact he is an idiot. Stay away from him, find a different buddy and continue what you're doing.

 

[Hickdive]

Hello there,

I notice you're from Northern Ireland and I'm curious, did this dive happen in NI or was it abroad?

 

[Andy_HFC]

The hand signals were the same signal but for different meanings. I was taught a closed fist held out in front of my chest is 100bar, and a T shape (with both hands, time out) is 50 bar, also meaning time to surface, followed by a thumbs up, i.e. dive finished, lets go.

He used a T-shape for 100 bar, then the plan was to surface when we reached 70 bar. But he didn't have a signal for this, so when i hit 70 i pointed to my gauge and thumbed up. I appreciate there isn't a world of difference, just that it was totally against everything that was drilled into me by my instructor. I did use his signals, but i didn't know how to signal 70 bar, i would use T shape then 2 fingers (50 + 20 = 70), holding up 7 fingers just looked daft, and he seemed equally confused!!

Now you mention it, he didn't have a bottom timer, and made no mention of using my computer for both of us. He just said when we hit 70 bar to ascend to 3m then wait until we reached 50 bar then surface. That was his dive plan. Sounds worse as i type it out....but honestly this was the way it happened.

 

[Andy_HFC]

Hello there,

I notice you're from Northern Ireland and I'm curious, did this dive happen in NI or was it abroad?

Nope, wasn't in Northen Ireland. I was away with my fiance on a diving break.

 

[seanmcfarland]

I would have been confused when you started signalling bars and I'm looking at psi. I have never had the opportunity to dive with an insta-buddy, but I have been on plenty of boats with them, and in the water with them. I use 'opportunity' because that is what diving with someone new should ALWAYS be. I don't care if you are a newbie, or the most experienced diver there is, diving with a new person should always be a learning experience. Sometimes you will learn a new and better way to do something. Sometimes you will learn that there are things that you should NEVER do. An experienced diver should be willing to share the experience he/she has gained, and a newbie should be open to learning new things. LEARN FROM EVERY DIVE!! Don't let an a**hole discourage you. He should have taken away the lesson that he neds to take it down a few notches to be an effective buddy and enjoy his dive. It is common knowledge that the two most dangerous types of dives rea 1) the newly certified, and 2) the "experienced" diver that have been doing it for so long that the rules don't apply to them. Both can learn from each other.

Happy and safe diving!

 

[pmlee]

This may make an impact on you; maybe not. 90% of my diving has been with insta-buddies. Most have been excellent and have imparted a lot of wisdom and some I have been with I realize I would never want to emulate.

That being said. Do not be too hard on yourself. Most of the time we are more critical of ourselves than others are. Your insta-buddy appears to have is own demons to wrestle. Don't accept them as your own.

I have also had the pleasure of diving with people I could barely communicate with due to language barriers. They were wonderful dive buddies!! We did very well together underwater and the experience was just awesome in the way we could share the experience and the wonder without exchanging words. We even ended up at the same restaurants and had a blast even though the only true common denomitator was the diving.

I have also had the reverse where I let someone steal my confidence and my ego took a really big hit. Do Not Let this happen to you. Continue to work on your skills and continue to learn as you dive. I had someone point out to me later that that perticular person's opinion really had no basis and this was from an extremely experienced diver who really is my favorite person to dive with even though we only get to get wet together once or twice a year.

 

[Beyond_Diving]

dude, jerks are everywhere... just a few weeks ago, i got paired up with one of them... really proud of the fact that he was a rescue diver... even going as far as complaining that nobody on the boat was up to his skill level... went quiet real fast when I let my instructor card slip out of my bag... so dont let those clowns bring you down... at the end of the day, diving is not a competition about who can get more badges, and better bottom time, etc.. just do your thing, keep diving and dive safe.

 

[Sas]

The hand signals were the same signal but for different meanings. I was taught a closed fist held out in front of my chest is 100bar, and a T shape (with both hands, time out) is 50 bar, also meaning time to surface, followed by a thumbs up, i.e. dive finished, lets go.

He used a T-shape for 100 bar, then the plan was to surface when we reached 70 bar. But he didn't have a signal for this, so when i hit 70 i pointed to my gauge and thumbed up. I appreciate there isn't a world of difference, just that it was totally against everything that was drilled into me by my instructor. I did use his signals, but i didn't know how to signal 70 bar, i would use T shape then 2 fingers (50 + 20 = 70), holding up 7 fingers just looked daft, and he seemed equally confused!!

Now you mention it, he didn't have a bottom timer, and made no mention of using my computer for both of us. He just said when we hit 70 bar to ascend to 3m then wait until we reached 50 bar then surface. That was his dive plan. Sounds worse as i type it out....but honestly this was the way it happened.

I think if you signal an ascent there should have been no confusion on his behalf, if a buddy signals to ascend I don't spent my time asking how much air they have left, I will start the ascent with them. A thumbs up is not a question, it is a direction, and especially not something to be followed by him querying how much air you had left! So I don't think hand signals were really the issue here, it was more that he ignored your signal for ascent to try to figure out how much gas you had left...

But yea, for future reference, pressure hand signals tend to vary quite a bit between people (at least in my experience) so it is worth your time really getting them clear on the boat and when in doubt ask to see their gauge (discuss a sign for that too - I tend to use two fingers across one palm). A few US tourists on the boats I have gone on have their pressure in PSI over BAR too, and depth in feet not metres, so it is helpful to know how to convert between the two systems.

Hope your next instabuddy is better~~

 

[ItsBruce]

I have not read all the posts, but wanted to make a few comments as I read.

1. SteveAD says: "I absolutely will not do any sort of aggressive dive with an instabuddy, ever." I usually will not do any sort of aggressive dive with an instabuddy. The exception is when the instabuddy is an instructor, in which case I treat it as if he is training me.

2. My most common buddy is my kid. We dive well together. BUT, if I give him a signal that he does not understand, he shrugs his shoulders and then does the macarena ... or at least thats what I think he does. At that point further communication ends until we get home.

3. I have seen the "T" signal used to mean "time to turn around... half my air is gone."

4. In an effort to be a good instabuddy, when I'm in that role, I do all the right stuff the right way, but I keep my mouth shut about what I know or don't know (unless specifically asked by a captain or DM). I never try to show off about what I do or don't know or what I have or haven't done. There is no benefit in it (unless I need to show I'm qualified for a challenging dive), and it may put other people off. "I've been diving since July" and "I've done a bunch of dives," seem to be satisfactory to most people I'm buddied with.

5. When I'm with an instabuddy, I never rely on him or her to be available in the event of a problem. I assume I must fend for myself and I act accordingly. However, I also act as if I am solely responsible for my instabuddy. The net result of this is that I make sure I have a real buddy for dives that I have to travel a long way to do or pay a lot for. For routine stuff, I'll dive with just about anyone who does not impress me as a dangerous jerk.

6. As I've said before and will surely say again: I consider a buddy to be like a piece of equipment. If I get on the boat without a piece of equipment and am lucky enough to borrow a replacement from someone else, I must expect that I won't get the best piece. Same for buddies.

I hope some of my thoughts are helpful.

 

[JoyfulNoise]

Sorry to hear of your not so positive experience, I've been lucky the few times I've had to dive with a different buddy (my husband is my dive buddy) I feel I learned and had a great time. The situations for me were always that the other diver was more experienced so I asked to follow them, I wanted them to take the lead as I felt more comfortable following. I've also been in situations where I'm the third, matched up with a 2 buddy team. Again, I usually follow. Funny thing is when I dive with my husband, I usually take the lead.

There are a lot of different personalities out there in the dive world, so I'm sure I'll come across some buddies that I don't match up with. I think its just something we need to prepare for. I think in this situation I might have passed on the second dive.