This same point of confusion comes up frequently. Middle ear problems and outer ear problems are completely different conditions, caused by different things and managed differently. However, they can both cause ear pain, hearing loss and can be caused by diving.
Here is a blog post that I wrote on this topic, maybe it will be helpful to you.
A few points, in no particular order:
1) As DDM pointed out, alcohol in the ear canal has no effect on middle ear barotrauma.
2) Most random doctors who are not ENT docs (or pediatricians) will have very little experience examining the ears. I understand that your access to specialty care may be limited, but if you go to some sort of walk-in clinic, are told that your ear is "a little red", and are given a prescription for antibiotics and ear drops, then you probably don't have an accurate diagnosis.
3) While a poorly ventilated ear (i.e. after barotrauma) may cause pain with commercial air travel, it is pretty unlikely that any permanent damage will be done, assuming that there is no inner ear DCS.
4) Valsalva maneuver (pinch nose and blow) pushes air up into the middle ear, so commonly used on descent. The Toynbee maneuver (pinch nose and swallow) is better for a reverse block, since you are trying to vent an overpressurized middle ear outwards. There are actually a number of different techniques to try (both during diving and afterwards in case of barotrauma),
see this link for details.
5) One way to differentiate middle and outer ear problems is to grab your ear and wiggle it (or open and close your jaw). If that makes the pain worse, it's more likely to be an outer ear problem.
6) Treatment for outer ear problems involves someone with experience cleaning out the debris, preferably with a microscope and suction, followed by dry ear precautions and topical antibiotic/steroid drops.
7) if you can't equalize, you shouldn't dive. Don't push it.
Good luck! Sorry you have to go through this...
