1) Backplate Wing is the way to go! IMO, you'll ove BP+W, and if it were up to me, I'd eliminate 80% of the jacket-style BCDs from the market.
2) But DIY is very possible!
You absolutely can retrofit a crotch-strap, although doing so may depend on the layout of the BCD and/or your DIY skills. The way I'd do this is stitch a short length of 2-inch webbing near the bottom creating a small loop. Inside that loop is a metal tri-glide. Obviously, you want to avoid piercing any part of your BCD, which has the bladder. You'll want to use a thick/strong/durable thread, such as the kind used for outdoor purposes.
Next, the crotch-strap is just webbing, triglides, and d-rings, and removable or replaceable!
Here are some photos of some of my crappy stitching efforts. For thick or tough nylon material, you may want a "leather stitching kit" or "sewing awl", rather than forcing a needle through by hand. If you're wondering why the stiching looks like crap, is because I did it by hand, with a needle and pliers, hah.
Use additional triglides to secure the crotch-strap. (apparently I need to insert that top section of webbing through a 2nd time, just noticed!