A New Element found

[Dave in PA]

Got this off of another forum:

A New Element

A major research institution has recently announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has been named “Governmentium.” Governmntium has one neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 224 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium causes one reaction to take over four days to complete, when it would normally take less than a second.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 4 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium’s mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as “Critical Morass.” When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium – an element which radiates just as much energy as the Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

 

[Mack Diver]

I think the reorganization is called Electionation which can cause older morons to be replaced by newer ones. The newer morons retain the existing peons and gather new peons into the mass

Mack

 

[Green_Manelishi]

Got this off of another forum:

A New Element

A major research institution has recently announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has been named “Governmentium.” Governmntium has one neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 224 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium causes one reaction to take over four days to complete, when it would normally take less than a second.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 4 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium’s mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as “Critical Morass.” When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium – an element which radiates just as much energy as the Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

That's funny. Glad I was not drinking coffee.

 

[DEEPSEAWOLF]

I SOOOOOOOOOOOO wish I had seen this during my high school years! I could have created a lecture and toured the country with THIS one!
Hmmm,... wondering if the elements Idiotirium, and Doltirium are involved in the material composition of Electorium. Another member of the Edeotic Periodic Table is Stupidite. Similar to the fabled Kryptonite from the comic book stories of Superman, this Mineral induces reactions in the human brain which cause it to release these hormones; Delirium, and Asinine. Unfortunately, if treated with Radiotherapy it causes a syndrome referred to as CNN. Whereby the condition is spread with an almost epidemic speed. Few if any treatments for CNN, also known as Comprehensive Neural Nonsense, have been found. It spreads like a plague among other countries, infecting and mystifying the public, and local governments.
Some of these elements have recently seen use in the U.S. military as first strike weapons. Imagine having CNN syndrome infect a country, effectively halting all actions and scrambling the brains of its citizens, then attempt Radiotherapy with Governmentium to truly cause a shutdown of local services. The results could be catastrophic if used on less developed countries than our own. I, for one, am glad the Division of Radiotherapy Kelvinic Services keeps these elements under STRICT lock and key. These are very dangerous items that any subversive organisation would LOVE to master the use of.