I drank the koolaid!

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Thanks everyone. I can't even TELL you how helpful it is to me, to read that others experienced the same level of frustration with themselves that I have. And I definitely see your point, Lynn, about that paradigm shift. I really did think that I was fine. And it turns out that not only was I NOT fine, I might even say I was downright dangerous! Now that I have a better understanding of what truly skilled diving actually looks like, I realize how far off the mark I am. And now I have a path to follow to get me closer to it.

So here's my latest report: Yesterday was a looooong day. Draggin my sorry arse out of bed at 4am was not easy. And the dives - I struggled so badly with buoyancy that I could tell Steve was seriously frustrated. It's hard to do skills when you're bouncing up and down in the water column. I couldn't come up with a valid reason WHY someone who's been diving for over 4 years, and has almost 200 dives, would be so awful in terms of basic buoyancy control. I'm sure part of it is diving all this new gear - I can't find the dump valve quick enough, and I think I might be a little underweighted. At one point I was close to tears, just in sheer frustration at my inability to make my body do what I'm telling it to do. Steve kept going over basics of buoyancy and propulsion verbally, and I couldn't seem to get him to understand that I already know all that - repeating it doesn't make me know it any better. My mind says to do it, in fact it SCREAMS to do it, but my body just doesn't always do what I'm telling it to do. Aargh.

The hardest part for me, and for my teammate Tom, was remembering the sequences of the drills. There are a LOT of little steps for the S drill and shooting the SMB, and we practiced them repeatedly on the surface, but once we got underwater and did them we'd forget things, or get them in the wrong order, or do something with the wrong hand. I felt like a bumbling idiot. I do NOT want to feel that way again. So this week I'm planning on just practicing them over and over. I'm going to bring my gear inside and sit on the sofa and just do them. Any time I'm watching TV, I'm going to be doing these drills with my hands until I can do them without even thinking.

I did have moments of triumph - my propulsion has improved over last week, and I thought I did a pretty good job on the mask-off drill. But those moments were too few and far between for my preference. :wink:

At least the weather and conditions were a high point! The sun was shining, it was warm but not stifling, the vis was at least 30ft, no swells or surge - spectacular. I'd forgotten how much I love diving the park. We have one more day of class next Saturday, which will also be out at the dive park. I'm trying to talk my husband into coming with me and then, after class, just doing a fun dive. I DEFINITELY feel a need to get out and have some non-goal-oriented, plain old fun underwater again.
 
LeeAnne, there are frustrating moments in every fundies class. Part of Steve's job is to push you a bit out of your comfort zone and let you react....he'll do it again and again and you'll eventually get better and then what used to be outside of your comfort zone will comfortably be inside it :)

I remember the whole "I hear what you're saying and I totally get it, and I know what it should look like....but I can't quite seem to get my body to do it." It does get better....a little bit of practice goes a long way! Visualizing, watching videos, doing dry runs, etc all help it come together quickly. So keep at it and try to have as much fun as you can. It can be stressful, but we dive because it's fun....so don't forget that, even while you're struggling to back kick away from your buddy while ascending and reeling in the SMB. At some point, that won't be quite so task-loading, trust me!


On another note, I really do hope you can convince your husband to go out to the park with you next week. Doing a fun dive and not worrying about skills and drills really helps you improve more than you might expect. As an added bonus, you can show your husband what you learned without trying to force it down his throat. After he sees how much improvement you've made in one class, he just might be tempted to set something up for himself :D
 
LeeAnne - I can assure you that every student in my Fundies class, myself included, had a day or days of frustration. For the first three days I thought I should give up diving cause I sucked and did not look as good as the others in class.

Bob (Sherwood) and Steve (Millington) kept telling us that the learning was happening, maybe not at the pace we wanted but it was happening.

Hang in there and remember you are there to learn and you are learning!!
 
LeeAnne, I can absolutely relate. At least you had some experience of adequate buoyancy control before you DID Fundies. Buoyancy for me, from the beginning, was something other people seemed to have an almost instinctive grasp of, and I just didn't. People can tell you over and over again WHAT to do, but it's really hard to tell someone HOW to do it, and even after you have done that, they still have to master getting that "how" done on their own. SO much of it is breath control, and whenever we are stressed or stretched, that tends to be the first thing that goes out the window. So, as you are trying to remember all the little steps, and reach your dump valve, and not get out of position . . . keep reminding yourself to breathe quietly, calmly and rhythmically. Eventually, with enough practice, you won't have to spend conscious energy on that except at extraordinary moments, but for now, you need to keep enough bandwidth to think about it.
 
Lynn, your post made me laugh because the one underwater signal that Steve gave me more than any other was the hand slowly waving forward and backward in front of his mouth, signaling "control your breathing". :D
 
The hardest part for me, and for my teammate Tom, was remembering the sequences of the drills. There are a LOT of little steps for the S drill and shooting the SMB, and we practiced them repeatedly on the surface, but once we got underwater and did them we'd forget things, or get them in the wrong order, or do something with the wrong hand. I felt like a bumbling idiot.

Until some of this stuff becomes muscle memory, we're all idiots underwater. :wink:

In fact, that's part of the power of standardizing the approach to certain tasks.
 
Oh, and the comment about using the right hand reminds me of when Joe Talavera wanted me to change the hands I was using for shooting a bag, and I ended up with the spool in one hand and the bag in the other, looking stupidly at both and wondering where the third hand to take the regulator out of my mouth was . . .
 
LeeAnne, I am selfishly enjoying the fact that you are going through this class before me. I feel like I have this extra insight to help me prepare. I just started making my list of things I need...pencil and wetnotes are now on the list, along with practicing my math skills.
On the other hand, reading your posts makes me scared to death of how hard it's going to be to do Fundies 4 days in a row! eep! I better get cracking on those worksheets now!
Keep posting these great reports and enjoy your dive next weekend. I can't wait to read all about it!
 
Leeanne, I'm sure your going to look back at this in a while and be so thankful you did it. I was ready to auction my gear off right there at the Casino at one point but I didn't. I'm glad I didn't!

You may not feel like your progressing now, but just wait until it is over. Steve knows whats up and he'll get you through it! I'm so stoked you had such great weather! Hopefully the weather cooperates again this coming weekend!

'Til then dry runs will be quite productive for you I'm sure.
 
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