How did you convince YOUR spouse to start diving

[terrylowe]

Well, thanks all for the replies!
I thought it would be a light and airy topic and some of you responded that way.
The spectrum of replies are really interesting.....they vary from humor to "how dare you you chauvinist pig" to the usual "how can you put your wife, children, and the whole dive boat at risk" talk.

Just to make things a little clearer; after 24 years of happy marriage, I adore my wife. I cannot and would not try to force her to do anything she does not want to do.

But how to "encourage" her to ENTHUSIASTICALLY SERIOUSLY WANT to?

 

[terrylowe]

So, see, "the man of the house" CAN demand the spousal unit learn to dive -- and she now has around 1000 dives since June, 2005.

I am waaaaay to chicken to write this...she might read it one day.

BTW, our bank account would be a whole lot healthier if I hadn't done that!!!!!

I understand that...I am paying for three children and myself so far....

 

[parzdiver]

The only thing you can do is...... nothing.

I've been certified for ten years and have tried in the past to get my wife to just do a discover diving. No luck what-so-ever. But then we were going to Bonaire with a large group. We stopped by the shop prior to the trip to pick up new boots for me and she meekly asked the shop manager about the open water class and if the math was hard.... HUH??? Well, in Bonaire one of the instructors (a great woman) took my wife for a couple awesome discovery dives in the clear blue waters of Bonaire. Guess what? She liked it and has said she will get certified before our next trip to somewhere warm.

So.... give her time... let her know the opportunity is there.... and always be happy no matter what her certification status.

Good luck and good diving.

 

[terrylowe]

No success. If she doesn't want to dive, don't force her.

Didn't say a thing about forcing her.

 

[terrylowe]

The only thing you can do is...... nothing.

Yea...that is probably the approach I will be taking.

I've been certified for ten years and have tried in the past to get my wife to just do a discover diving. No luck what-so-ever. But then we were going to Bonaire with a large group. We stopped by the shop prior to the trip to pick up new boots for me and she meekly asked the shop manager about the open water class and if the math was hard.... HUH??? Well, in Bonaire one of the instructors (a great woman) took my wife for a couple awesome discovery dives in the clear blue waters of Bonaire. Guess what? She liked it and has said she will get certified before our next trip to somewhere warm.

So.... give her time... let her know the opportunity is there.... and always be happy no matter what her certification status.

Good luck and good diving.

Wow! That's great! I am sorta hoping something magical like that will happen in Cozumel.

 

[terrylowe]

I didn't. It was her idea, and I will deny any allegation that I manipulated events so it became her idea.

All the best, James

This strikes a funny nerve with me. My wife is the BEST and making me think it was my idea...

A generic example: "Honey, dear, Love of my life...do you want to take me to Wal-Mart now or do you want to wait a half hour".
It's not until after we get there that I realize that she just made me go!

 

[terrylowe]

Then ask yourself how valuable your own life is to you.

Maybe she is more aware of that risk than you realize and has decided her life is not worth it.

She has four children. Maybe she doesn't want to do anything that could cause them to lose their mother.

You should respect her decisions and not ask strangers how to coerce and manipulate her.

Sigh. I know it, I know it....I am just stupid aren't I? I guess I hate my children too for allowing them to dive. I mean, what WAS I thinking? I think we are going to trade in our gear and get sewing lessons instead. Have to figure out what to do with the sharp needles though...

 

[terrylowe]

It would be great if she wanted to dive, but she doesn't. I believe she shouldn't.

I agree 100%. Sure wish she wanted to...

 

[FireInMyBones]

Didn't say a thing about forcing her.

I apologize for the implication. I have a tendency to be persuasive to the point of forcing things on my family and friends without realizing it. I am learning not to force and I wanted to share my learning experience with the public.

I am glad to hear that your marriage has lasted for 24 years. I wish more people could say that. You must be doing something right. :serenade:

After those 24 years of learning her, how does she learn? How does she mull things over? If she learns best through reading...perhaps a book on the joys of diving, if through experience...offer to buy her a private try scuba course with an instructor friend, etc...

If she sees the fun that you and your kids are having, she will either turn around one day or become all the more content serving as surface support for the family.

 

[DevonDiver]

You want her to dive?

Just threaten to take away her vacum cleaner...and tell her she won't get the new Kenwood Magi-mixer that she was dreaming of getting for Christmas.