Question re: families that dive

[Spencermm]

I have a wife and 2 girls, ages 12 and 14. I am a new diver- no one else dives yet, but I’d like for us to be a diving family.
I won’t say that I am “over” protective, but I am very protective. For example, when we go out to do something as a group, I have to know where everyone is at all times and know what they are doing, who is around them, etc. Otherwise I am VERY uneasy.
So, to the wives, husbands, mothers and fathers- when you dive with family, do you worry, to an uncomfortable degree, about their safety?
This isn’t a HUGE issue for me, but an issue none the less. I also wonder that, as I learn more about diving, and as I gain confidence in our collective skills, if this will become less of an issue.
Thanks for any input,
Spencer

 

[willembad]

I'll give my 2 psi. I'm very new myself, so take it for what it's worth. Me and my wife actually waited to start our training after my son turned ten years of age thinking it would be a great family thing to learn together. If I had to do it over I would have been diving for years before my son did his Jr. OW.

We allowed him to finish his course and we do dive with him on occasion, but only with him being a 3rd member of our "team". We also limit the dives to ~30 min. @ 15 feet max. That seems to be his comfort zone and it makes me feel confident that I could handle any situation should it arise. Both me and my wife has since been EAN and Rescue certified and started on Advanced (maybe NAUI Master) and we are diving all the time, but it would be a while before I could consider my son a true buddy and feel like we could rely on one another on any "real" dive.

I will say this to close though. It is a joy to see him experience and enjoy this activity that I love so much and I know we are going to have many dive stories to tell together in the future.

Be safe,

Willem

 

[Ber Rabbit]

Hate to break it to you but as a female who had a Dad who needed to know as much as you do...you're being over protective. BTW, that over protective tendency breeds defiance especially as the girls get older I never even told him I was learning to dive until after I was certified because I was going canoeing one day and he said, "They scuba dive in a pond at that place, you stay away from that underwater breathing stuff." I did my first day of check-outs in that "pond" a few years later and you can bet he didn't know anything about it until weeks afterward.

Your job is to make sure they have access to great training then let them go so they can become self confident divers. Diving without you would probably be a good thing for them until they are confident in their skill as divers. You can't protect them from everything but you CAN help them get the tools to protect themselves.

I dive with my husband and we have a great time together. The underwater communication and teamwork skills are reflected in our "on-land" relationship. I actually tend to be less worried about him than I would be about a different buddy because I know he's a competent diver and if he doesn't like the dive he'll abort it. There's no gung ho "need to impress my buddy" attitude because we are part of each other. I trust him with my life and he trusts me with his, THAT is what you want to strive for; knowing in your heart that your family can take care of you if something happens on a dive.
Ber :lilbunny:

 

[bluering]

hey, spencer, I hear you loud and clear. my girls are 14 and 12 also. we are a diving family. when it was just my wife and I diving, I useto say it was twice the equipment and half the fun!!!! then my wife and i started taking advanced courses and things started to get a little better. now, with the girls diving, we pratice drills at home in the pool, we play games using our navigation skills,we do hand signals and i let the girls make up some of their own signals. we keep the dives very simple, and dive our plan . i have aborted dives in the past when things just did not seem rite, like tidal serge or when the tide is too strong. i still worry, but i have keep diving fun and education and experience is the key for me. hope this helps Bill

 

[BubblesUp]

My 14 year old son and I have been diving together for about three years. At the time I was a relatively new DM and had seen my share of adults make mistakes or get themselves into trouble underwater, so I was concerned about the safety of a young diver who could get a c-card simply by meeting minimum qualifications. Before the card was his, he had to pass not only the agency's standards but Mom's (tougher) standards.

As a parent, certainly, I felt a need to protect him while diving. However, I realized that the best way of doing that was to teach him to be a skilled and self-sufficient diver, rather than trying to do everything for him. We plan our dives - including air consumption calcs - and don't push limits. We practice skills...we take turns leading dives...we debrief dives and talk about things we could have done better. After all that, his mean old mom also makes him schlep and clean his own gear.

I'm sure I'll always feel some degree of protectiveness and cautiousness when diving with him. But there's a great feeling of pride when a then 13-year old can lead you back to the boat after a 40 minute dive on a shallow reef.

 

[adurso]

We have been diving as a family for 5 years, it took me 17 years to get my wife to dive, she decided too when our youngest was 10 and wanted to get certified, our other was 15 and wanted to go also.

Our son and my wife generally buddy up, and our daughter and myself, we dive more as a team of 4 than 2 buddy pairs.

There is an element of watchfulness that should be maintained, this manifests itself with me checking air constantly and watching the other three like a hawk, so that I spend more time watching them than anything else. But the enjoyment I see them having far outweighs anything I might miss whilst keeping an eye on my family.

Big bonus, the family is together and no one can talk underwater....

 

[Spencermm]

WHat you guys are doing is what I hope to be doing next spring.
Thanks for the responce.
Spencer

 

[Spencermm]

I don't intend to even be present for any their formal training so they can give their full attention to the instruction. My instructor has said that it is best to let each family member take classes seperately- that way they can shed their roles as daughters, sisters, moms, and ofcourse dad.
We have a lot of fun snorkeling as a family. I usually stay at the rear so I can keep an eye on stuff. My girls are pretty smart- smarter than me, in fact. But they do on occasion walk head-long into situations that they just didn't know were dangerous- due to inexperience with the situation. Hell, who hasn't.
At any rate- I can't wait for next spring!

 

[diver 85]

I have a wife and 2 girls, ages 12 and 14. I am a new diver- no one else dives yet, but I’d like for us to be a diving family.
I won’t say that I am “over” protective, but I am very protective. For example, when we go out to do something as a group, I have to know where everyone is at all times and know what they are doing, who is around them, etc. Otherwise I am VERY uneasy.
So, to the wives, husbands, mothers and fathers- when you dive with family, do you worry, to an uncomfortable degree, about their safety?
This isn’t a HUGE issue for me, but an issue none the less. I also wonder that, as I learn more about diving, and as I gain confidence in our collective skills, if this will become less of an issue.
Thanks for any input,
Spencer

Here's my experience.......My wife, myself & our oldest, our daughter, then age 14, were certified together back in '85........Our next 2(boys) were each certified when they became 12 Y.O.......After the youngest got certified, we all went To Grand Cayman for a dive trip & I 'had' 5 in the water @ one time--children's ages were 12, 14 & 20.....ABSOLUTELY NO problems EVER diving with (any) of them, many dives to greater than 100 ft, many......IF they are taught correctly there should not be........Over the years, we have made hundreds of Caribbean dives as a family, although, as the oldest got older it became less 5-somes........As a family sport, I can think of none better, plus it doesn't hurt now when the wife & I have to head off for Little Cayman, Cozumel or our house on Roatan just to go diving, lol........Let them get certified, you'll never regret it....IMO.......

 

[StraitsdiverGeo]

I had been diving for two years, when my wife and son joined the team. We have had many dives as a Family, and loved every second of it. Safety is first as should be, we never venture beyond enyones experince level.
Of all the things we have done together, this is one of the best. Oh! and I can't forget, my son's girlfrend is taking up diving, so it wont be long and we will have four divers in the family.

Regards, George