easyrider
Registered
I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people
die of natural causes.
>
Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are
removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes
out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.
>
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a
replacement.
>
Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
>
There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead.
>
Life is sexually transmitted.
>
An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.
>
If quitters never win, and winners never quit! , then who is the fool
who said, "Quit while you're ahead?"
>
Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
>
The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
>
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that person to
use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
>
Some people are like Slinkies . . not really good for anything, but you
still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.
>
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying
of nothing.
>
Have you! noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks
about seeing UFOs like they used to?
>
Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
>
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to
criticism.
>
Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a
substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
>
In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is
weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
>
Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to
realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.
>
How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a
whole box to start a campfire?
die of natural causes.
>
Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are
removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes
out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.
>
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a
replacement.
>
Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
>
There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead.
>
Life is sexually transmitted.
>
An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.
>
If quitters never win, and winners never quit! , then who is the fool
who said, "Quit while you're ahead?"
>
Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
>
The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
>
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that person to
use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
>
Some people are like Slinkies . . not really good for anything, but you
still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.
>
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying
of nothing.
>
Have you! noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks
about seeing UFOs like they used to?
>
Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
>
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to
criticism.
>
Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a
substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?
>
In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is
weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
>
Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to
realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.
>
How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a
whole box to start a campfire?
