We celebrated 25 years of marital bliss in French Polynesia last May. Our main plan was a cruise, which gave plenty of personal service and many opportunities to visit different islands. Lots of activities are available through the cruise line, though they are a bit tame for most young and active folks. All of the topside attractions you mentioned, Clutch, WERE available, at times and prices of the cruise line's choosing.
With the ease of internet communication, it is easy to arrange activities with other providers. Everybody we contacted was perfectly willing to work around the ship's schedule.
If you choose to travel to only one or two islands, Moorea, or Bora Bora may be more attractive. The other FP islands are more relaxed, have less or no disco type attractions and have more "island flavor. The farther you get from the Tahiti, the less development there is, and the simpler the locals' lifestyle seems.
Tahiti has more nightlife, shoping and other activities if that is what you want. It depends on what you are looking for. In addition to the cruise we spent 4 days onshore on Tahiti. I think I would have enjoyed one of the less populated islands more, since the more metropolitian aspects of Tahiti were not that attractive to me.
Others on the board have traveled extensively on the various islands and have reported their experiences. Use the search feature and read up to get more background info.
One other thing to consider...Since last November, when we booked our trip, the dollar has been "BUSHwhacked," and is now worth 20-30% less against international currency. Don't worry, prices were plenty expensive before. Don't flinch at paying $6 for a 1.5L bottle of water. That was one reason why the cruise ship's meals included format was attactive. We did enjoy shopping at the local grocery stores on the onshore part of the trip. Resturant food was expensive, but tipping is not a local custom, so it evens out a bit. Just go into it aware that you ain't in the US and savor the differerences.
KYDan