Just got this again in my email and thought it worh posting. Yes, it's old, but still pretty funny.
Love Your Job!
This is even funnier when you realize it's real! The next time you have a
bad day at work think of this guy. Rob is a commercial saturation diver
for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on
offshore drilling rigs. Below is an e-mail he sent to his sister. She
then sent it to a radio station 103.2 on the FM dial in Ft. Wayne,
Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to
say, she won.
Hi Sue:
Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a
bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so
I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not
so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must
bore you with a few technicalities of my job.
As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to
the office. It's a wet suit and this time of year the water is quite
cool! So to keep warm we have a diesel powered industrial water heater.
This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea and heats
it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver
through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose.
Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times
with no complaints. What I do when I get to the bottom and start working
is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my
whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything
was going well until all of the sudden, my butt started to itch.
Of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few
seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from by back, but
the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot
water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now,
since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to
it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate.
When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the
jellyfish into the crack of my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of my
dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the
fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing
hysterically. Needless to say, I aborted the dive. I was instructed to
make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five
minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry. When I
arrived at the surface I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.
As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running
down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt
as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I
couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut. So next time
you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if
you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt. Now repeat to yourself, I love
my job, I love my job, I love my job!!
Love Your Job!
This is even funnier when you realize it's real! The next time you have a
bad day at work think of this guy. Rob is a commercial saturation diver
for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on
offshore drilling rigs. Below is an e-mail he sent to his sister. She
then sent it to a radio station 103.2 on the FM dial in Ft. Wayne,
Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to
say, she won.
Hi Sue:
Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a
bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so
I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not
so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must
bore you with a few technicalities of my job.
As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to
the office. It's a wet suit and this time of year the water is quite
cool! So to keep warm we have a diesel powered industrial water heater.
This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea and heats
it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver
through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose.
Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times
with no complaints. What I do when I get to the bottom and start working
is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my
whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything
was going well until all of the sudden, my butt started to itch.
Of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few
seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from by back, but
the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot
water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now,
since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to
it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate.
When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the
jellyfish into the crack of my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of my
dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the
fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing
hysterically. Needless to say, I aborted the dive. I was instructed to
make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five
minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry. When I
arrived at the surface I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.
As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running
down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt
as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I
couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut. So next time
you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if
you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt. Now repeat to yourself, I love
my job, I love my job, I love my job!!
