More for the pilots

[ScubaBaby]

I trained with another airline as a hostess before training with my current employers. I still have the Crew Safety Training Manual from the first course I did and have attached a photo of part of the manual - it made me chuckle.

For those who can't read it - the circumstances are that you've landed on water, evacuated and a shark is lurking :

"Sharks are scavengers, but have been known to attack swimmers and rafts etc. Therefore when a shark is sighted, take the following action:
- Stop fishing
- Remain still and keep quiet
- If it comes too close, try to it on the snout with CREW SAFETY TRAINING MANUAL.

Please bear in mind this manual is not small, its a ring binder full of this kind of advice and is kept locked in our crew bags, in an overhead hatrack. I'm sure if we landed on water thats the first thing I'll want to take me with !!!!????!!!!!!

It made me chuckle so I thought I'd share!

 

[lamont]

Heard them all before, but they are still funny. Always remember, it is better to be on the ground wishing you were in the air than in the air wishing you were on the ground.

That's for all of us chicken pilots out there.

Scuba version: always remember, it is better to be on the surface wishing you were in the ocean than in the ocean wishing you were on the surface.

 

[SueMermaid]

Sue,

You only have one choice. Get your pilot's license.

Oy, the mere thought of being under a hood makes me nauseous. I am a big puker. (I almost barfed on our first date, what an impression that would have made on him).
Although Joe says otherwise, I know I'd make a crappy pilot, since I usually get an anxiety attack when ever he and I go flying!
Joe flies for a living, (He flew banner ads for a few years, now he flies a twin engine turboprop for a charter company) and sometimes even for fun, too. I will always go flying with him when we get the chance, although it will probably take me a while before I actually look forward to getting back in the plane!

 

[patriot_flyer]

Aviation in itself is not inherently dangerous.
But to an even greater degree than the sea,
it is terribly unforgiving of carelessness, incapacity, or neglect.

 

[DennisW]

Sue,

Even if you don't get your license, take the AOPA pinch hitter course. You will be much more confident and understand the process much better. Learn how to navigate. Take the sectional and figure out where you are while you are flying. Keeping busy keeps your mind on important things, not how sick you feel. Learn how to change the frequencies on the radios. Do something rather than just being a passenger. I make a really poor passenger myself. By the way, Donna is terrified of heights. Go figure.

 

[skyimp]

Oy, the mere thought of being under a hood makes me nauseous. I am a big puker.]


Keep in mind, even Chuck Yeager had air sickness when he began flying. It passes.

 

[adder70]

Sue,
By the way, Donna is terrified of heights. Go figure.

Yeah, but in a plane, you are INSIDE the plane.

I am perfectly fine in a roller coaster on the high lifts and srops because I am strapped in (OK, I do breathe a bit of a sigh of relief when everyone else starts screaming, but not much), and I love the most radical ones around. However, put me in an open skycar with no seat belt, and I will turn my knuckles white and start violently vibrating the car before it's 50 feet off the ground! :lol:

My wife tried repeatedly to get me on a skycar, and after the first ride, she promised never to try again!

 

[Mako Mark]

Aviation Truisms

The three best things in life are a good landing, a good orgasm, and a good bowel movement. The night carrier landing is one of the few opportunities in life where you get to experience all three at the same time.

I get that when the wife parallel parks the car!

 

[sparrow187]

Pilot: Hey Chief, the IFF ( Friend or foe) Doesn't work in the Official Mode
CrewChief:Sir, please spell the word for the position the switch is in.
Pilot: O F F chief
Chief: that would be the off position sir.

Simple joke or actual event You decide. But anything is possible in the pilot zone