Its the attitude, more than the age.
...The 13 year old boy I was buddied up with was a total screwoff, paid no attention so he had no idea what/where/when he was supposed to be doing, refused to follow even simple directions...
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I think that maturity of a child (or anyone for that matter) has everything to do with the parents. We have all seen those kids who treat their parents like crap, and the parents let them get away with it. Those kids you would like to just take outside yourself and spank them! My guess is the 13 year old "wonder" kid was one of them. Probably the parents were those parents always making excuses for their children and never disciplining them. It really angers me when I see that. It also irritates me when people lump all kids under a certain age with some kid they know that is this way.
I have been coaching a soccer team for 5 years, ever since the boys were in Kindergarten. There are definately kids that I would consider taking diving, and those I would never take diving. If you meet these kids parents, you can tell who you would be a good diver, and who wouldn't, without ever even talking to or seeing the kids. If you don't think your kid is mature enough to dive, then it probably isn't their fault.