Loss of confidence...

[Caradhriel]

A friend of mine, who got certified about the same time as me, had an accident shortly after he got the certification, and since then has been rather skitish about diving. At the same time, though, he wants to get over it and get back in to diving. He's asked me what I would suggest, but since it's been so long since I've been in the water, I don't really feel comfortable in giving him advice. So I figured I'd ask here. Anyone have some suggestions I could give him?

 

[DeepTrip]

Depends on the accident and how fatal is it. In general, he could try free diving first in confined water using only mask, snorkel and fin. Then maybe he can try-out the basic scuba skill with the instructor.

Again, it all depend on the accident and the trauma.

 

[armyscuba]

What Happened?

 

[Mo2vation]

A friend of mine, who got certified about the same time as me, had an accident shortly after he got the certification, and since then has been rather skitish about diving. At the same time, though, he wants to get over it and get back in to diving. He's asked me what I would suggest, but since it's been so long since I've been in the water, I don't really feel comfortable in giving him advice. So I figured I'd ask here. Anyone have some suggestions I could give him?

This is a tough one to offer specific thoughts on, simply because we don't know the nature or depth of the spook.

My story:

My wife and I got Drysuits a year and a half ago. I sort of immediately "got it"... never got floaty, or inverted, or anything. We took the class, and the first time I hit the ocean it just made sense.

My wife, on about our 4th or 5th dive in a local dive park (no currents, little chop, shallow, mellow) had a slow motion semi-runaway feet-first ascent from about 30 feet. When I turned around to not see her, I looked up and there she was, on the surface.

What shook her up the most was the fact she couldn't get my attention. It happened so fast, and I blew it and didn't see it (as she was behind me...)

This incident shook her up for a long, long time. She's done maybe 5 tentative dives in the 15 months since the incident. Its only recently (the last month) that's she's getting her confidence back and starting to dive more and more.

You hit it on the head - the confidence thing. That is so important. What scared her wasn't the ascent, but the fact she couldn't reach me. So she felt really alone... even though it was for just a moment. I've become a much more aware diver and better buddy since then, and us getting back in the water together - she sees that. She sees that she can control her suit, that I'm close by, that with her light she can get my attention. These little victories erode the wall of self doubt and the "what if's" that have been feeding her poor confidence for over a year. We have had some great dives the last few weeks.

What does all this mean? Well, it means your buddy needs to take this at HIS pace. Remain under controlled conditions, and let him lead. Patience isn't my strongest attribute - but through this I've become a better, more patient buddy, and that's helped her a lot.

Share some more with us, if you will.

He can get it back. I've seen it happen to my wife.

K

 

[mustfajohnson]

I had an accident a few years ago. To paraphrase the DAN folks, someone filled my tank with car exhaust. No doubt about it, my buddy saved my life from about 50' down. I was pretty confident almost cocky before that. It took me a year and about 50 dives before I was somewhat confident and never again cocky. I figured out that for some reason when I wear gloves I get that dread feeling. Don't understand that but, I started with shallow shore dives not exceeding 30 feet and just went through those OW skills like mask removal over and over. Oh and kept a buddy close. You gotta go dive!

 

[DA Aquamaster]

To paraphrase Ernest Hemingway:

"(fear), as distinguished from panic, is almost always just a lack of ability to suspend the function of the imagination. Learning to suspend your imagination and live completely in in the very second of the present minute with no before and no after is the greatest gift a soldier can acquire."

Divers, like soldiers, train for the unexpected and need to be able to both forsee it and forsee their reactions to it when something does go wrong. Both soldiers and divers also need to plan and remain aware of the plan as things unfold, so I think Hemingway's statement applies nicely to divers.

If all divers never did anything except focus on what could go wrong, no sane diver would ever choose to go back in the water. Fear is a normal emotion that when kept under control can be used to heighten the senses and keep you sharp. But it needs to be kept in check and balanced with the realities of the moment. So being able to suspend your imagination that, for example, a ravenous man eating great white shark is lurking just beyond the limits of your visibility waiting to ambush you is pretty important to having a safe and enjoyable dive.

A diver who is consumed with fear or who is overly focused on imagining all the things that can go wrong will not be focused in the moment and will not enjoy the dive. Ironically, they will also not be safe as their mental preoccupation with all the things that can go wrong will result in a lack of awareness and attention to detail in the moment that will inevitably bring about one of the many catastrophies they fear. For a diver, the effects of nitrogen narcosis further aggravate the problem. Regaining confidence in the water is not just nice to have, but critical to safe diving.

Given that the accident occurred early in the diver's career, positive diving experiences should help the negative event fade in importance over time as more and more positive diving experiences occur. In this case easy dives in shallow, non threatening and preferably interesting environments may help the diver gain experience and stay focused on something other than the potential for disaster. The answer as to whether the diver can regain that cofidence should be found with in a relatively small number of dives.

If the accident was related to a skills deficiency, additional training or drills may help restore confidence. Similarly if it were due to a buddy failure, training in solo diving and the development of self sufficiency skills may be helpful.

It the accident were related to an equipment failure, buying his/her own equipment may help by both increasing the diver's knowledge of the equipment and by increasing his/her confidence in the equipment and it's maintenence history.

It will also come down to a self examination of the diver's own values and why the diver feels they want to dive. Diving is an adjustable risk sport where the diver for the most part can control the risks they choose to encounter but in the end, whatever the risks large or small, the diver has to feel the trade offs are worth it if they are to continue diving.

For some diver's risk is even part of the attraction. Some divers enjoy very demanding technical dives diving for the challenges presented by the inherent risks and for the feelings that come from minimizing and controlling those risks. Others enjoy just going where few others have gone and accept the inherent risks while still others just like the escape that occurs when you focus on a challenging dive and every other problem in your world is temporarily forgotten and unimportant.

Some divers stay with recreational diving and do it simply for the beauty, diversion and/or socialization it offers. But the risks though small, are still present and the decision has to be made by the diver that the benefits of diving outweight the risks.

In the end there is, for most people anyway, more to life than diving and choosing not to dive because it does not appeal to you certainly does not make a person a failure.

 

[Warren_L]

This is a tough one to offer specific thoughts on, simply because we don't know the nature or depth of the spook.

My story:

My wife and I got Drysuits a year and a half ago. I sort of immediately "got it"... never got floaty, or inverted, or anything. We took the class, and the first time I hit the ocean it just made sense.

My wife, on about our 4th or 5th dive in a local dive park (no currents, little chop, shallow, mellow) had a slow motion semi-runaway feet-first ascent from about 30 feet. When I turned around to not see her, I looked up and there she was, on the surface.

What shook her up the most was the fact she couldn't get my attention. It happened so fast, and I blew it and didn't see it (as she was behind me...)

This incident shook her up for a long, long time. She's done maybe 5 tentative dives in the 15 months since the incident. Its only recently (the last month) that's she's getting her confidence back and starting to dive more and more.

It also helps when there are others around to assist ... safety in numbers thing. That day we did the Dive Park in December was one of the first dives Jaye had in her drysuit after the incident, if I remember correctly, and though she was a little tentative, she did well. But I think it helped that between the two of us, we always had her in our sights as she kept mostly between the two of us. But yes, it is all about regaining confidence. The skills are there, just need the confidence.

 

[s7595]

the answer is simple .your buddy needs to re focus on why he decided to get certified .I speak from experance ,when I did my first confined course .I failed the padi float and bc remove and replace at surface .all the other students passed and were moveing on.I was so discussed with my self that I told the instructor that maybe scuba was not for me . the instructor said sorry to hear ,but here is some advice you passed everything that is hard ,step back and re think your decision .I went home and 24h later could not live with my self ,imangine a life with out scuba . so as they say when you fall of your horse get back on . today I am glad that scuba is part of my life .tell your buddy to find a dm that he clicks with and go diveing ,I am sure a few dives and he will be back

 

[Caradhriel]

What Happened?

From what I understand, he and some friends went for a dive. All certified, 2 were working on rescue diver certs, 2 others were open waters, and 1 was advanced, so a total of 6 people there that day. They had to walk across a coral bed to get to the open water part, which he said was a drop off type entrance. While walking out, his foot got stuck in a hole, he tripped, a wave came and broke on top of him and he got flipped around, head was smashed into the coral, which resulted in a couple days being really sick, though I think that was from the meds the ER gave him, and he lost all his gear that wasn't strapped to his BC, ie mask, fins, snorkle, etc.

Thanks so much for the advice, guys. Only thing I could come up with was possibly going through the class again and taking things slowly.

 

[Finnatic]

Caradhriel,

I am wondering if this was your friend's first experience with shore diving?

My husband and I had a similar experience in Bonaire. We chose Bonaire as a dive destination after certification because of the reputation for calm waters, great visibility, coral and reef life, and ease of shore diving. We were really looking forward to trying the shore diving. We even bought the little book describing each dive site which is also rated as novice, intermediate and advanced. We picked up a few tanks and were ready to roll..or so we thought. We selected a site marked as "novice", watched some other divers making their entry and got geared up. The beaches on Bonaire are coral rubble as you described. It was difficult walking on this rubble in full gear as it constantly shifted under your feet. Even though the surf was gentle, the entry was difficult as there was now not only shifting coral rubble underfoot but holes such as you described and also the waves were hitting at knee level. Although we didn't fall, it would have been very easy to have fallen and be pushed into the coral. We did the dive and I felt a great deal of anxiety when it came time to exit. I removed my fins while floating on the surface just past where the waves were breaking and my husband decided he would exit first and then help me out. While wading in I stepped in one of the holes which were hard to see because of the breaking waves. I was pushed forward onto my knees and was unable to regain my feet with all of the heavy equipment on my back. Although only my pride was hurt, I wound up literally crawling out of the water. Since I had a death grip on my fins, and Bonaire does not allow gloves in the water, this was not easy. I didn't want to do any more shore dives after that. I could easily picture in my mind the scene you described that your friend went through.

Back at the dive shop we hired a DM to introduce us properly to shore diving, then scheduled a few boat dives to help me get my confidence back. We did do some more shore dives, and they did get easier.

I would suggest your friend schedule some easy, shallow boat dives to get his confidence back and then hire a DM for some one-on-one shore diving. I don't know where your friend was diving, but I thought shore diving, even under "ideal" conditions was difficult. Sorry for the long post, but I hope this helps.